Number Twenty
by DareU2Bme
Summary: Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's still single, he isn't a Broadway star, he's just lost his job which he hated anyway , and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali &** lurkdusoleil  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Gay Sex, _Blaine_

**Note:** By 'Blaine' I mean that if you are a die-hard Klainer, you might have a hard time swallowing how Blaine is portrayed in this story as well as the angst around their break-up. I don't want to paint Blaine as a villain because I love him, and I don't think I _did _make him out to be one, but I figured I'd warn for previous Klaine and the portrayal of Blaine as _not_ Kurt's one and only. In canon, Klaine is my OTP, but I like to multiship with fanfics.

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did_ take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story. Trust Sam to take a light-hearted, stupid rom-con and turn it into an angsty story. Hah.

* * *

**_Chapter One_**

* * *

Kurt had always had big plans and high aspirations back in school. He knew from a young age who he was and what he wanted to do with his life. He had to shout to be heard and fight to be himself. People like him were rare and undervalued in his home-town. It wasn't just because he was gay, though being 'out' in Lima, Ohio wasn't a picnic, but it was that he had dreams. Dreams of standing on a large stage with an applauding audience standing before him. Dreams of New York, of his name in lights on Broadway, of bouquets in his dressing room and... of a beautiful man waiting backstage after each show with a proud smile on his face and a single rose in his hands. Big dreams for such a small town, Kurt knew.

But along with being a hopeless romantic, Kurt was also driven –maybe even more so. He was taunted and pushed around for being gay, he was mocked and slushied for being in Glee club, and he was competed against mercilessly for choosing Rachel for his best friend. Kurt owned it, though. He knew having to overcome things was what gave him strength. That fight inside of him, that need to win, it flourished under the strain of adversity. He knew his less-than-ideal life as a teen was a large reason for why he had come to grips with his identity and his dreams at such a young age. People say you find yourself in college, well, Kurt knew who he was well before the age of thirteen, and he spent his teens reaffirming it every single day.

Waking up next to some guy whom he barely even liked that Saturday morning, though, Kurt wondered if he had possibly lost a little bit of himself along the way. Still, he quietly slipped out of bed, scurried into his ensuite, swiftly brushed his teeth while dabbing concealer under his eyes, then fixed his hair and tiptoed back to bed. The sexy younger man lying next to him stirred and Kurt pretended he was just waking up.

"Morning," said Benjamin, smiling groggily at Kurt while he stretched his arms over his head.

"Hi," breathed Kurt, a little winded from his scurrying.

"Damn," groaned Benjamin with a grin. "How do you manage to look so good in the mornings?"

Kurt preened at his words, ready to lean in for a kiss but then Benjamin was rolling out of bed. Lips still pursed, Kurt blinked a few times at the man's bare back before shaking his head and taking a deep, cleansing breath.

"Last night was fucking awesome," said Benjamin, not without enthusiasm, as he rooted around the sheets that had been kicked onto the floor the night before. "But now I'm all dried sweat and come... and _nasty_. I'm gonna go."

"You could shower here," offered Kurt, hopefully. "We could go out for brunch."

Benjamin paused in his movement before turning to look over his shoulder at Kurt.

"Kurt," he sighed out in exasperation. "You know how I feel about using other people's showers."

"Yet you're fine with sleeping in their beds," muttered Kurt before struggling to smile sweetly. "How about we meet for brunch, then? After you go home and shower?"

Benjamin hummed thoughtfully as he stepped into his dark denim jeans and pulled them on. He took his time doing up his fly and then searched for his shirt.

"Why are you so keen on this brunch thing?" he asked, back to Kurt, body language evasive. "Isn't that something chicks do with their mother-in-laws or something?"

"I just... thought it would be nice," sighed Kurt looking down at the pillowcase he was anxiously fiddling with. It had somehow worked its way off the pillow during their activities in the night.

"Nice," laughed Benjamin, doing up the buttons of his dress shirt, the one Kurt had picked out for him during their shopping date a few weeks earlier.

"Yeah," whispered Kurt, heat rising to his cheeks and a lump forming in his throat. "Nice."

"I'm gonna meet up with the guys in the park. Lunch and ultimate Frisbee," said Benjamin, obviously dismissing Kurt's brunch idea without guilt.

"That sounds like fun," offered Kurt, looking up to smile hopefully at the younger man.

"Yeah," said Benjamin, sitting down on the edge of the bed to pull on his socks. "How about you?"

"Oh," breathed out Kurt before he could stop himself, feeling disappointed at not being included in Benjamin's plans.

"Kurt," said Benjamin looking remorseful when it sunk in that Kurt had thought he would be coming with him. "I'm sorry, it's just, the guys don't really like you."

Kurt's face paled and Benjamin was quick to continue.

"It's nothing personal!" he hastily explained. "I mean, _I_ like you... especially certain parts of you."

Kurt turned away from Benjamin when the young man leaned in with wiggling eyebrows. Kurt was suddenly feeling ill.

"So," said Kurt, determined to push on despite everything. "My brother's wedding is next month..."

"Erm," stammered Benjamin and his face twisted like he had just bit into a lemon. "I don't do family functions... the whole meeting-the-parents thing isn't my scene."

"Excuse me?" exclaimed Kurt in surprise.

"Sorry, Babe," said Benjamin with a shrug though he didn't look sorry at all. "It is all too monogamous and committed for me."

"Monogamous?" shrieked Kurt. "You mean you...?"

The guilty bewilderment on Benjamin's face was answer enough. Kurt lept from the bed and angrily pushed the man out of his room. He grabbed his cheap, brown jacket from where it was hanging over the back of his couch as he continued to roughly direct Benjamin to his door.

"We're done," Kurt managed to say firmly as he shoved him into the apartment building's main hallway.

"Kay," said Benjamin, ducking as Kurt threw his shoes at him, and not seeming the least bit bothered at the drama of the situation. "If you ever want a hook-up sometime, though, no strings attached, just to let off some steam..."

"Thank you, Ben," deadpanned Kurt. "That's very_ generous_ of you."

Benjamin smiled at what he must have mistaken for praise before saluting Kurt and turning to leave. Kurt groaned in frustration and was about to slam his apartment door when he noticed his neighbour across the hall watching him. He had a cocky, knowing grin on his stupid face. Kurt was about to snap at him to _mind his own damn business_ when he realized the guy was standing completely nude with nothing but a newspaper strategically held in front of his groin. Kurt's eyes widened and his cheeks immediately grew red. He slammed his door shut to the sound of deep chuckles echoing from across the hall.

Kurt spent his weekend doing laundry and cleaning traces of Benjamin out of his home. On Monday, he set off to work feeling numb and tired. He worked in a cubicle in an office surrounded by soulless coworkers who looked more like coffee-powered drones. He hated his job, but it paid his rent. He resolutely pushed the judging voice of 16-year-old-Kurt out of his mind as he sat down at his desk and powered up his computer.

"Kurt," called his boss from the office only paces away from his little box of grey boredom.

Kurt stood and headed to the glass-encased office with the view of the city, his coworkers' eyes on his back.

"We're making some unfortunate but necessary cutbacks,"explained his boss once Kurt was seated in the uncomfortable chair across the desk from him. "Including you."

"Wait... what?"

His boss, barely older than him but a total kiss-ass to the people further up, sighed and leaned his elbows onto his large, cluttered desk. He looked Kurt in the eyes with forced remorse on his plain face.

"Kurt," he said. "You're fired."

Kurt's stomach dropped as the words echoed through his head with their terrible finality. He swallowed the bile in his throat before attempting to speak.

"That's... um... who else are you letting go?"

"Just you," answered the man and Kurt's rising stomach twisted uncomfortably.

"I see."

"Yeah."

Kurt let out a sigh as he watched his boss turn around in his desk chair, an awkward but unmistakable dismissal. He stood, took a deep breath, and walked out of the room with his head held high even has his pride lay dashed to pieces. He had always felt his job was _so_ below him, and yet here he was, being fired from it.

The subway was like a tin of sardines even in the middle of the work day. Kurt balanced his box of items from his cubicle precariously on his lap as he paged through a magazine. He always brought a magazine with him on the subway as a feeble attempt to keep random people from talking to him. He hated friendly strangers.

Most of the articles were uninteresting, it being a magazine primarily for straight guys, but then something caught his eye.

_What's Your Number?_  
_The average American man sleeps with 9 women before getting married. How do you stack up?_

Kurt's eyebrows shot up. The elderly woman next to him gave him a curious look and he realized he must have gasped outright.

"It says here," explained Kurt, not usually one to initiate conversation with strangers but desiring some camaraderie in his shock. "That the average American man sleeps with nine women before marriage."

The woman frowned and shook her head.

"Hard to believe, isn't it?" she asked and Kurt enthusiastically nodded in agreement. "Such a high number. Men these days are _pigs_."

She practically spat out the last word. Kurt froze. _Wait._

"Um," he stammered, his heart hammering in his chest. "Maybe it is different for gay men."

The older woman gave him a soft smile and patted him on the knee in a reassuring gesture.

"It might be harder to find someone compatible when you're a minority," she said sympathetically. "But I'm sure you'll find Mr. Right soon, son."

Kurt winced at her words but managed to give her a tight-lipped smile before turning his attention back to the article. He read through it a few times, shaking his head and frowning all the while. Just before the subway reached his stop, he carefully tore the page from the book and folded it up to put in his wallet. He would have to get to the bottom of this.

That evening he sprawled out on his couch with a carton of Thai food and mentally listed all the men he'd had sexual relations with. _...Marcus was 15, David was 16, Trent was 17, Sean was 18, and Benjamin made 19. _

Nineteen.

One more than_ double _the National average. Kurt felt sick.

The week drifted by rather quickly despite Kurt having no job to go to. He spent his time sending his resumes out to all the places hiring in his field of work, even some that weren't. On Thursday, he nearly knocked into his nude neighbour in the foyer of their apartment building. He was fully clothed this time, thankfully.

"Careful, Babe," laughed Naked Neighbour, grabbing Kurt's arm to steady him.

Kurt stepped away brusquely, frowning.

"Don't call me Babe," snapped Kurt, the word reminding him of Benjamin and leaving a horrible taste in his mouth when he said it.

Naked Neighbour raised his hands in mock surrender, his grin never slipping from his face. They silently retrieved their mail from the brass mailboxes and turned in unison toward the stairs.

"So," started Kurt hesitantly. "Are you new here... or?"

"Been living here three months, now," Naked Neighbour informed him and Kurt couldn't help but feel embarrassed.

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh," laughed Naked Neighbour good-naturedly.

...Or maybe cockily-naturedly would be more appropriate –if that was a thing. It should be a thing. Kurt would make it a thing. The stupid man was so overconfident in himself that it made Kurt's skin crawl. The evil smirk on his rodent-shaped face didn't help his cause much, either.

"It's okay," said Naked Neighbour, pulling Kurt from his stewing. "You were distracted by Mr We-Can-Still-Hook-Up. He seems like a _great_ guy, by the way."

Kurt rolled his eyes, cheeks burning at his own humiliation.

"Yeah, not so much," he managed to squeak out.

Naked Neighbour laughed again, shaking his head.

"Not the best taste in guys," he accused.

"Not the best taste in _shirts_," countered Kurt sharply. "Polo shirt with a popped collar? Really? Popping your collar never was entirely stylish but it _definitely_ hasn't been an acceptable form of expression since the _nineties_. You look like an outdated douche bag who picked up whatever shirt he could find the morning after a particularly hard-hitting fraternity party."

"Oh, Pussy's got claws," exclaimed Naked Neighbour, sending Kurt a wink before ducking into his apartment, chuckling as he let his door fall shut.

Kurt stood glaring at the door for a beat before shaking it off and crossing the hall to unlock his own.

* * *

Saturday brought Rachel's wedding shower which Kurt had been both looking forward to and dreading. Rachel was a little hard to swallow on the best of days but now that she was getting married she had become the bride from hell. Some days, it even seemed that 'Bridezilla' couldn't quite cover it.

Kurt winced when he heard Rachel's laughter rise over the general buzz of voices as he hung his coat in Finn and Rachel's entry closet. He cut through the groupings of guests to head up the narrow staircase knowing his step-brother would probably be hiding out up there.

"Kurt," exclaimed Finn in a hushed voice when Kurt found him in the spare bedroom. "I'm glad to see you. I don't think I even _know_ half the people here and you know how I feel about these fancy parties."

Kurt smiled sympathetically and gave Finn a quick hug.

"When does Puck get here from L.A.?" he asked.

"Not until next weekend," answered Finn with a frustrated sigh.

Kurt patted his shoulder.

"Are you sure you're okay with being a bridesmaid?" asked Finn, anxiety written across his face. "I mean, like, I remember Junior Prom and I just..."

"Finn," cut in Kurt.

"Puck's been my best friend since we were little, but you're my brother," said Finn, looking guilty.

"Finn," said Kurt, his voice biting but softened by the smile on his face. "It's fine. Rachel's my best friend, you're my brother; I'm honoured to stand with you. I don't care which side."

"Cool," said Finn, smiling hesitantly. "I mean, it isn't like Rachel expects you to wear a dress..."

Kurt sniffed indignantly at that.

"...and we're gonna have a chick stand with the dudes on my side for symmetry or whatever. Rachel's idea. So, I don't think it'll be too bad."

"Finn," said Kurt, squeezing his brother's shoulder. "It's fine. I know Diana is standing on your side and I know it is important to Puck that he get to be your best man. Don't worry; I'm not scared of being mistaken for a girl."

Finn smiled and nodded, seeming relieved. Kurt grew solemn then.

"Can I ask you a personal question?" he asked.

"Okay," answered Finn sounding mildly confused at Kurt's change in demeanor.

"How many people have you slept with?" asked Kurt.

"Uh... like sex?"

"Yeah."

"Four, including Rachel."

"Four!" choked out Kurt.

"Yeah, uh, why? How many for you?"

"Nine..."

"Nine!? WHOA! Dude!" exclaimed Finn, eyes widening and a grin starting to pull his mouth open. "Nice!"

Kurt forced out an anxious smile and bumped Finn's offered fist. The sick feeling in the pit of his stomach grew and twisted. He needed a drink... or nineteen.

* * *

Kurt didn't remember much of the wedding shower beyond the bottle of champagne he had confiscated from the kitchen for himself shortly after talking to Finn. He had already taken a few indelicate swigs from the bottle before even joining the party. There had been squeals when he had walked into the living room. He was attacked with hugs and kisses from Rachel, Tina and some of Rachel's friends from college and her theatre group. Later he had given a speech and Kurt wasn't sure of exactly what he had said, but he did remember how the eyes of many of the people in the room had steadily grown wider as he spoke. He hoped that it had come off much better than he remembered.

None of that mattered though because, at the moment, Kurt and his friends were laughing and grinding on the dance floor of the club they had chosen to have the bachelorette party at. The beat was pounding right in Kurt's chest, making him want to move to the music and pushing away the painful twist that had been developing there over the course of the last week. The alcohol he'd been forcing into his system all day was also helping to numb his problems.

They congregated at a round table when tired of dancing. Tina was giggling furiously and Rachel was shouting for pink shots. Tristan, Rachel's friend from back in NYADA who had quickly become a close friend to Kurt, was trying to talk Diana into taking off her top even though Kurt knew for a fact that he was _very_ gay, while Kyle and Jared were making out.

"I propose a game!" exclaimed Kurt, suddenly. Everyone's attention turned his way. "We're going to write the number of men we've been with on a piece of paper and then we'll draw them out and guess who the number belongs to."

"Yay! Games!" cheered Rachel in a drunken stupor.

"I have a notepad!" volunteered Diana, grabbing up her purse.

She passed the pad and a pen around the table so each person could write their number on it before tearing the paper out and passing the pad on. They made a pile from the papers in the middle of the table. Kyle went first, drawing out a paper with '4' written on it and showing it to the table.

"I'm going to guess Tina," he said with a grin.

Tina laughed but shook her head.

"No," she said. "I'm one."

"One?" exclaimed a few voices in disbelief.

"Mike's always been the only one for me," she sighed happily.

Something started twisting in Kurt's chest again. There had been a time when he, too, had someone. When there was someone in his life whom he thought was his '_one and only'_. The time hadn't lasted very long and he had been left with a hole in his heart; the world never seeming quite so bright ever since.

"Okay, my turn," said Tina, reaching into the pile.

"That was me, by the way," offered Diana with a drunk snicker and Kyle grinned mischievously at her.

"Five!" exclaimed Tina before turning to grin at the bride. "Rachel!"

"No fair," shrilled Rachel before pouting her lips. "I tell you and Kurt _everything_."

Kurt smiled tightly. The painful twist in his chest was growing despite the music and the alcohol.

"My turn," said Rachel, reaching for the papers and picking up the top piece. "Eleven! OH, WOW!"

"Guilty," said Tristan with a deprecating smile.

"Manwhore!" exclaimed Jared and Kyle, pointing and laughing.

Kurt could feel the blood draining from his face.

"Shut up," bit out Tristan, though he was grinning almost proudly. "My turn."

"Two," he said, sounding almost disappointed at the number.

"Me," said Jared, smiling over at Kyle.

"You guys haven't been playing the game right," said Diana with a flip of her hand. "Kurt said you were supposed to be guessing."

Kyle shrugged before turning and winking at Jared.

"There's only one left," exclaimed Rachel, reaching for the paper. "That means this one is Kurt's!"

Dread, cold and terrible, tightened at Kurt's throat and he lunged for the paper in the center of the table. Rachel was faster. She grabbed it and began to unfold it. Her mouth dropped open in shock. Kurt covered his face.

"What?" asked Diana, curious. "Is it high?"

Kurt groaned and she turned to grin wickedly at him.

"It's high isn't it!?" she asked before pulling it from Rachel's wobbly grasp. "Gimme!"

She gasped.

"Nineteen!?" she exclaimed in disbelief.

Kurt didn't have to look up to know the whole table was looking at him. He nodded minutely into his crossed arms and everyone gasped before Tristan led the group in catcalling and cheering.

"I admit it," he sighed out, raising his head to look miserably out at his friends. "One more than _twice_ the national average."

He sighed woefully and pulled out his wallet. After retracting the article from it, he unfolded it and held it out.

"There's even a whole article in Modern Man about it," he explained. "The national average for men is nine... **_nine_**."

Rachel ripped the magazine page from Kurt's hand and started scanning it over while Kurt and the others continued to talk about the numbers. He explained that he had figured playing this game would make him feel better about how high his number was but, considering the outcome, it had only made him feel worse.

"Apparently, in America, 96% of men who have been with twenty or more women will never find a wife," Rachel suddenly read outloud, catching everyone's attention.

"It _actually _says twenty?" asked Kurt staring across the table at Rachel with a scowl that was a mix between accusing and terrified.

She nodded sympathetically.

"Who cares?" asked Tristan in a biting voice. "Who the fuck did that study anyway? The 'scientists' over at Modern Man magazine?"

"Hey," cried out Jared. "That magazine gave me the best orgasm of my life!"

"I thought _I_ gave you the best orgasms of your life," pouted Kyle and Jared grinned at him before leaning in for a kiss.

"Actually, that study was conducted by Dr. Cory Miller at Harvard University. You might have heard of it. It's this quaint little school in Massachusetts," cut in Diana with a matter-of-fact tone that wore a sassy lilt. "You better watch yourself, Kurt. Soon you'll wake up forty-five, alone and no self-esteem... maybe an STI or two."

A few of the people at the table winced at her harsh words but no one said anything. If Kurt hadn't been feeling so horrified, he might have spat out some scathing response, but he wasn't up to it. The pounding in his head and the rushing in his ears were making it hard to focus on anything except for '_forty-five and alone'_.

"Maybe the percentage is so high because these guys who sleep around aren't even _interested_ in getting married," pushed in Tristan, his face a portrait of annoyance.

"I'm sure that's part of it, Babyboy," said Tina, finally speaking up. She glanced over at Kurt with a sad frown and opened her mouth to continue speaking but Rachel got there first.

"Just because you're a heartless _dick_," started Rachel, obviously having had too much to drink and speaking with undue anger. "Doesn't mean that Kurt doesn't want a proper romance and happily-ever-after... no matter how many people he's hooked up with."

Kurt winced at the judgement in Rachel's words. These were his friends and if they were bothered by his number, how would he ever find someone who would still want to be with him forever when they found out his number?

"That's for straight men, though," argued Kyle. "It could be differ..."

"That's high for _anyone_, though," countered someone else, but Kurt wasn't paying attention.

"Nineteen dicks," bit out another voice which _had_ to belong to Diana. "That's nineteen dicks that have probably been in other people, maybe nineteen other people each."

"Prude," muttered another person.

"That's... 361 bodies," she continued as if she didn't hear the other people, annoying everyone else at the table with her drunk mathematics skills. "And what about the people who have been with those people? It just keeps going on and on, spiralling. Kurt should really get tested."

"Stop it, Diana!" snapped Tina.

"What even constitutes sex when it comes to gay men, anyway?" asked a female voice.

"Coming," decided someone else.

Kurt wished the room would stop spinning.

"Coming? Really?" asked someone else. "So what if one of you doesn't come?"

"Well, that's a shitty night for one of you," laughed a deep voice, it sounded like Tristan's.

"This is ridiculous," said someone. "You guys need to all shut up, can't you see you're upsetting Kurt? He might be a slut, but he's still our friend."

Kurt could feel pressure building behind his eyes but he pushed back at it. He blindly grasped his drink and raised it to his lips, taking a long pull before setting it back down on the table with a loud '_thunk_' causing everyone to shut up and look his direction.

"Okay," said Kurt, his face coloured with determination. "That's it, I'm taking my destiny into my hands."

Rachel was nodding emphatically while Diana just rolled her eyes. Everyone else was watching curiously.

"I'm at nineteen which means I'm still okay. I have one left before this becomes a problem," he continued before pausing for tipsy emphasis. "Okay, so, listen... listen guys, gals, you people... I'm making a proclamation."

He looked around the table to make sure everyone's eyes were on him.

"I'm not going to have sex with one more guy until I'm sure he's '_the one'_. I may not have control over much in this life but I _do_ have control over my pelvis!"

"And mouth!" added Tristan with a devilish wink.

"Shut up!" cried out Kurt angrily, even though his face felt like it might be smiling. "You're one of my nineteen problems so you can just shut the fuck up!"

Tristan grinned proudly when a few of the people at the table gave him surprised looks.

"The next guy who I fuck will be my husband," announced Kurt.

Everyone nodded, Tina laughed giddily.

"To taking control of my destiny!" cried out Kurt, shouting it at the top of his lungs and he jumped to his feet.

"To taking control!" echoed his friends and they clinked their tall, slim shot glasses together before the group threw them back.

Kurt swallowed the sharp-tasting liquid and raised his glass again.

"To better decision-making and following through!" he called out, climbing up on his chair. "To TWENTY!"

The entire bar yelled 'twenty' in response despite not knowing why. More drinks were poured and cheers were called out. The rest of the night became a blur of drinking, dancing, and loud music. It was fantastic. He hoped Rachel enjoyed her bachelorette party because he sure had.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali &** lurkdusoleil  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex, Klaine Angst

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did_ take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story. Trust Sam to take a light-hearted, stupid rom-con and turn it into an angsty story. Hah.

* * *

Chapter Two

* * *

Kurt could feel the room tilting, his brain spinning inside his skull, before he even opened his eyes, before he even felt fully conscious. Slowly, facial muscles tense in anticipation of a headache, Kurt opened his eyes. Immediately, he was squinting in the bright morning light. Someone shifted beside him and he turned his head just enough to peer to the left of him. His gaze was met with one very naked ass, unabashedly on display by the sleeper it was attached to. Kurt shut his eyes and tried to regulate his breathing. His stomach rolled angrily.

One week.

Was one week really as long as he could go without sex, now? What was wrong with him? And who the hell was this person laying next to him?

Ignoring the protests of his body, Kurt pulled himself out of bed and tiptoed to his bathroom hoping like hell that they at least had the mental capacity to use a condomlast night. He stared at himself in the mirror, scowling and angry. Diana was right about him.

Forty-five and alone.

No self respect.

He pulled a comb through his hair while he brushed his teeth. Then he took out his under-eye concealer and covered up the dark circles under his eyes. He would shower once he got whoever that was in his bed out of his apartment. He'd call him Mr. Bare-Ass for now... or maybe Mr. Snuffles-In-His-Sleep... or even Mr. Number Twenty.

NUMBER TWENTY.

Kurt's eyes widened and his legs nearly gave out beneath him.

Shit.

SHIT.

Kurt tiptoed back into the room, he thought about climbing back into bed and pretending to just wake up as per usual, but honestly, he just wanted the idiot out of his apartment. The idiot with a fairly nice ass... NO! Kurt nearly slapped himself in reprimand.

The body on the bed started to move around and Kurt quickly grabbed his underwear off the floor and tugged it on.

"Mmm," groaned out the young man, reaching for the thick-lens glasses that were sitting on Kurt's bedside table, an alien sight. He pulled them on and then blinked across the room at Kurt a few times before a flirty smile spread across his face. "Wow, these must be my beer-goggles because you look just as good as you did last night!"

Kurt's mouth almost fell open in shock, but he managed to stop himself from gaping at last minute. Instead, he turned and grabbed his jeans from the floor to pull on.

"Oh!" exclaimed the man, sitting up quickly in the bed and Kurt nearly dropped his pants in surprise at the sudden outburst.

He turned sharply to look at the guy who was smiling brightly at him from the bed, dick unabashedly on display between his legs as he sat up on his knees. Kurt quickly turned away again and worked at the buttons on his tight jeans.

"Are you an astronaut?" asked the guy with what seemed like genuine interest.

Kurt's eyebrows rose at that. He finished doing up his jeans and then grabbed his shirt before turning around to eye the other guy shrewdly.

"I ask because your body is OUT OF THIS WORLD," he said, crying out the last four words with loud enthusiasm that rocked Kurt's headache while he bounced on Kurt's bed.

"Oh, g*d," gasped Kurt, holding his head in his hands.

He fled his bedroom, leaving the naked guy whose name would now be Mr. Shitty-Pick-Up-Lines in his mind. When he got to his kitchen, Kurt leaned against the counter to wait out the desperate rolling of his stomach before pulling out his coffee maker. It was a very short reprieve. He had only just finished measuring out coffee grounds when the man came into view, already dressed in a dress shirt with a tiny pattern on it, a navy blue sport coat, and slim-cut tan trousers. Kurt's eyebrows knit together.

"Are those tiny mustaches?" he asked incredulously as he scanned over the tiny pattern on the guy's shirt.

The young man's face erupted into a huge smile that caused his eyes to squint behind his round, thick glasses.

"That's exactly what you said to me last night," he laughed, shaking his head. "You are so adorable!"

Kurt bit his lip, unsure how to respond to that. He turned back to the coffee maker and drummed his fingers against the countertop.

"Are you making some breakfast?" asked the young man, bouncing up the step from the living room to the kitchen. "I absolutely love omelettes –as long as you only use egg-whites. I'm not a yolk man. Too much cholesterol, don't you know. Actually, I've heard that they've been doing studies that suggest that eating egg yolks is as bad for your health as smoking. Can you believe that? As bad as smoking! Of course, the studies are inconclusive, but can you just imagine? You spend your whole life smoke-free because you are worried about your health only to find out that..."

"No," cut in Kurt, sharply and with a little too much volume. The other man stopped mid sentence and tilted his head to the side with curiosity. "I... err... no, I'm not making breakfast today, sorry. Just... um... just coffee."

"Ooh," drew out the other man, still smiling happily as if nothing could put a damper on his mood. "I love coffee. Do you have whole milk? Usually I use almond milk, but I know that would be a tall order considering it isn't as common for people to have almond milk in their refrigerators."

Kurt resisted the urge to facepalm, knowing that it would only aggravate his hangover more. He wondered if this man had drunk anything the night before because he was much too awake and joyful for someone who hadjust partied all night then went home with a stranger for sex.

"I only have non-fat milk," said Kurt apologetically, although he wasn't sure why he felt bad about it. The other guy could just go to the coffee shop down the street on his way home. Kurt should tell him that, actually. He really wanted this crazy out of his apartment.

Suddenly a knock sounded at Kurt's door and his eyebrows drew together in confusion. He turned away from the young man's bright, overly eager face to answer the door. He checked the peephole and internally groaned when he saw it was Naked Neighbour. That was just what he needed; to add Naked Neighbour to Mr. Way-Too-Chatty-In-The-Mornings while he was dying of a hangover. Still, Kurt unlocked his door and opened it a crack to see what his neighbour wanted.

"I've got your newspaper," said Naked Neighbour, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

"I don't get the newspaper," deadpanned Kurt.

"Oh," said Naked Neighbour before throwing it carelessly over his shoulder. "Well, then. I was just..." He pushed his way past Kurt into the apartment. "I was locked out of my apartment."

Kurt could feel anger rising up in his chest but he let it simmer as he shut his apartment door and turned to regard the two nameless New York citizens standing in his living room.

"Hi!" said Naked Neighbour, when he took in the other occupant of the room.

"Well, heeeellloooo there," said Mr. Forever-On-A-Caffeine-High with a flirty smile.

"Who's your friend, Kurt?" asked Naked Neighbour turning to grin and wink at Kurt.

He obviously knew what this was. And Kurt frowned at the realization that Naked Neighbour knew his name while he didn't even know his. He frowned even fuller when he realized how sexy Naked Neighbour looked in his dark-wash jeans and his tight, grey polo.

"Chandler," said Mr. Really-Obvious-When-Interested. "Chandler Kiehl."

Naked Neighbour looked over his shoulder at Kurt again and it struck Kurt that he might have asked just to help Kurt figure out Mr. Overstayed-His-Welcome's name.

"Sebastian," said Naked Neighbour in reply, shaking Chandler's hand and smirking at him. "I live just across the hall."

"Well, Sebastian," said Chandler, tone thick with flirtation. "It is a pleasure meeting you, but I should probably run."

Kurt sighed in relief.

"Kurt," said Chandler, and how come both men knew his name before he knew theirs? How was that even fair? "Would you like to get together sometime?"

Kurt's eyes-widened at the invitation. He opened his mouth and closed it a few times.

"Um," stammered Kurt. "I guess so? I mean, yeah, okay. That... um... sounds nice?"

"How about dinner tomorrow night?" asked Chandler with a widening smile.

"Oooh," said Sebastian with a sad frown. "We have that tenants' meeting tomorrow night."

Confused, Kurt almost asked Naked Nei...Sebastian what he was talking about before he realized the guy was trying to help him out.

"Oh, right," replied Kurt with a nod and a matching frown. "Damn. Perhaps another time?"

"Okay," said Chandler, not put out. "What about Thursday?"

"How about he calls you?" suggested Sebastian as he herded Chandler to the door, his smile and proximity seemingly mesmerising the shorter man who was all smiles as he was practically pushed into the hall. "You know, once he knows what his week looks like."

"Okay, yeah, that sounds..." spoke Chandler as Sebastian started to shut the door. "Wait, do you have my number?"

The door shut.

Kurt laughed in relief.

"Wow," breathed Sebastian, turning back to Kurt with amusement dancing in his eyes. "You really know how to pick winners, Kurt."

Kurt's smile instantly fell from his face and he scowled at Sebastian before peeking out his peephole. He saw a tall, lanky blonde stepping out of Sebastian's apartment with the distinct look of shame on his face. Kurt narrowed his eyes and strode with a dignity he didn't feel back to his kitchen to grab a mug from the cabinet.

"So," said Kurt as he poured himself some coffee. "You said you were locked out of your apartment?"

"Yes," replied Sebastian, his voice suddenly very close to Kurt's ear and Kurt spun around just in time to have Sebastian take the mug out of his hand.

Kurt watched with a scowl and raised eyebrow as Sebastian set the ridge of the mug to his lips and inhaled deeply. The taller man let out a sigh and then took a sip.

"Perhaps if you had knocked," said Kurt, deciding to ignore the fact that the man had just helped himself to his coffee and, instead, got out another mug. "The tall blonde would have let you in."

Sebastian's eyes widened comically and Kurt couldn't help but grin vindictively at the other man's surprise. It was short-lived, though, because Sebastian's cocky grin quickly reformed on his face before he took a longer drink of the coffee in the mug that was cradled in his large hand.

"Good to know he's gone," said Sebastian before explaining, though it was obvious Kurt already knew the truth. "I may have been hiding from a similar situation."

Kurt licked his lips before giving Sebastian a calculating look.

"Similar situation," he repeated.

"Yep," said Sebastian with a wink before turning to scan Kurt's apartment with an appraising but curious eye.

Kurt warily watched him move around his living room, touching things on his bookshelves and running his hands over the tops of his furniture. He tried to tamp down the irritation growing inside of him but it was difficult considering his hangover and who he had woken up to. He just wanted to be alone to wallow in the loss of his number twenty.

"Vogue?" asked Sebastian, turning away from Kurt's bookshelf with an accusing expression. "Isn't that a little stereotypical, Babe?"

Kurt cringed at the pet name.

"Don't call me that," he said in a low voice.

Nostrils flaring, Kurt took a moment to breathe and then another to sip at his coffee.

"I happen to enjoy fashion," he finally said.

"Women's fashion," Sebastian corrected teasingly.

Kurt looked down at the shirt he was wearing before looking back up at Sebastian, not amused.

"Fashion knows no gender," said Kurt with a lift of his chin.

"Oh, I don't know about that," laughed Sebastian. "I'm pretty sure if you check the tag of that blouse, it will say otherwise."

"You really aren't one to talk," snapped Kurt, narrowing his eyes. "Just because it has a little green crocodile on it and cost you more than $50, doesn't mean it is worth wearing."

Sebastian looked down at the short sleeved polo he was wearing and grinned. He shook his head silently before taking another drink of his coffee.

"So," said Sebastian after a few more long sips. "We make a pretty good team."

Kurt's eyebrows knit together for a moment before it became clear to him what Sebastian was talking about. The thought of helping each other get rid of people the mornings after made his head hurt even more.

"I don't want to be part of your crusade to sleep with every willing and fabulous man in New York City, okay?" answered Kurt with a frustrated sigh. He set down his coffee on the counter and rubbed lightly at his temples. "They are kind of like my brethren."

The corner of Sebastian's mouth quirked up at that.

"Oh, Princess," sighed Sebastian with mock disappointment. "I thought you would be more fun than that. I saw your toast on Youtube... you seemed like you had a good sense of humor."

"What!?" exclaimed Kurt, body snapping straight from where he had been bending over the counter.

Sebastian grinned gleefully.

"Someone should go back in time and tell 16-year-old me that the guy I wanted so badly would end up marrying my best friend," quoted Sebastian with sparkling eyes.

Then Sebastian did an exaggerated frown as if trying to mimic what Kurt's face must have looked like and continued, "Actually, someone should go back in time and tell 16-year-old me to cool it because the guy I wanted so badly would end up being my brother!"

Kurt's hands flew up to cover his mouth as his eyes grew wider still. Had he really said that? It was no wonder everyone at Rachel and Finn's wedding shower were giving him scandalized looks. And now everyone could relive it through the internet.

"THOSE... THOSE BITCHES!" he exclaimed in horror.

"Finn's just lucky I'm gay or he would have competition for you, Rachel," said Sebastian, in a really terrible attempt at Kurt's voice before laughing out loud.

Kurt just shook his head, mouth open and stomach twisting.

"Who names their kid Finn?" asked Sebastian through chuckles.

"But, seriously," he spoke again in a high voice, clearly not done mocking Kurt. "I'm so happy for you two. I just hope you don't reproduce because... ey!"

Kurt crossed his arms over his chest and glared angrily at Sebastian.

"Are you quite done?" he asked when Sebastian finally stopped laughing and glanced over at him.

He bit his lip and nodded, though his adam's apple was still bobbing in his throat with contained laughter. Kurt rolled his eyes.

"How did you find it so fast?" Kurt asked, he had only made the toast yesterday.

"It was attached to Google Alert," replied Sebastian with a shrug. "My dad was an attorney, so, I have this habit of digging up dirt on people. I have the whole place under... surveillance. Guy in 4-D tried to marry his dog!"

Kurt's mouth dropped open again at that, but he quickly shook it off.

"Well, as much as I loved having you over," said Kurt, moving across the room to pull the mug out of Sebastian's hands and shoo him toward his apartment door. "I have places to go and still need to get ready."

"Alright, Babe," said Sebastian as he let Kurt push him out of the door. "I'll let you go powder your nose. See you around."

"Don't call me Babe!" exclaimed Kurt before shutting his door in Sebastian's face.

He let out a sigh of relief when he turned back to his now silent apartment. What a day, and all before ten a.m.

* * *

That afternoon, Kurt found himself sitting in a specialty bakery with Rachel, sampling the different flavors of cakes they offered. Rachel would daintily take a bite of one cake and then quickly scribble down a hundred different notes in her lace-adorned wedding notebook. Kurt wished he could be more into it; he had loved wedding planning in his youth. Now, though, it just felt like a slap in his single-and-lonely face.

"At the party last night, do you remember someone named Chandler?" asked Kurt, playing with the silver fork between his fingers.

"Um, maybe?" answered Rachel distractedly.

"Blonde hair, thick glasses, talks too much?"

"Oh, yes," replied Rachel, recollection taking over her face. She set her pen down and looked up at Kurt with wide eyes. "Goodness, he was annoying! So... what about him?"

"I slept with him," mumbled Kurt.

"What?"

"I slept with him," whispered Kurt.

"Kurt, you'll have to speak up," said Rachel. "Remember our voice training; enunciate."

Kurt sighed in frustration.

"I slept with him," he hissed loudly and a few people in the store turned their heads to stare.

Kurt glared at whoever he could make eye contact with until they looked away, despite the blush rising on his face.

"This is your fault," he accused.

"Uh, no," laughed Rachel. "When I tried to get you to leave the bar last night, you spit on me."

Kurt's jaw tightened.

"But congratulations!" exclaimed Rachel, her face suddenly lighting. "You said twenty would be your husband and it looks like you found him already! You might not be the most aesthetically pleasing couple together. You and Blaine," Kurt winced at the name, "looked much better together than I expect that Chandler fellow and you will, but true love doesn't always take its cues from Hollywood. At least you gave up that whole Broadway star idea; you won't have to worry about how you two look together in photo shoots and on red carpets." Rachel paused for a millisecond. "I have to admit, I didn't think you'd find the one so quickly. I'm so very happy for you, though!"

Kurt knew there wasn't a sarcastic bone in his best friend's body but he stared at her in mortification as she continued. Could she really be serious?

"Anyway," said Rachel, her smile falling off her face as she gave him a stern look. "I don't want to be the ants at your picnic, but I feel I need to make one request. As my wedding is approaching and we have put so much time and effort into making it the perfect event, I ask that you hold off on any big engagement announcements or sudden eloping until after my big day."

Kurt rolled his eyes.

"I'm sure that now that you've found your one and only, it'll be hard for you to wait, but if you waited a year, or a perhaps two, that should give our friends and family ample time to recover from my wedding and Finn and I time as a new married couple to finish with our... Oh! Kurt! A winter wedding! You should have a winter wedding!" exclaimed Rachel, clapping her hands together. "Not this winter, that would be too soon, you need more time to plan; but perhaps next winter. Oh yes, that would be perfect. You could have it in January to ensure that there's the highest possible chance of snow. It will be beautiful."

"Rachel," snapped Kurt. "Would you stop it? He is not my husband to be. There is no way I would marry him!"

"But... he's your number twenty," argued Rachel, looking lost.

Kurt sighed.

"And therein lies the problem," he said, his shoulders falling in defeat.

Rachel's face morphed into one of sympathy. Kurt hated it.

"Oh, Kurt," she breathed out. "I'm so sorry."

Kurt just shook his head, not wanting to hear her condolences or her ill-fitting words of advice which were most definitely about to follow. He grabbed the fork in front of him and took a big bite of the sample cake, suddenly in need of a distraction. Rachel's eyes widened.

"Mmm," groaned Kurt, before shoving another large bite into his full mouth. "This is good."

"Kurt," reprimanded Rachel quietly, her face still ugly with pity. "Kurt, Honey."

Kurt took another huge bite, crumbs sticking to the sides of his mouth. He knew he was making even more of a fool of himself, but he didn't care. Suddenly, the sweet taste of cake was the only thing keeping his emotions inside. He'd swallow them down with large bites of sugar and carbs.

"Kurt!" hissed Rachel, grabbing his arm. "That's enough. The idea is to just taste them."

"Why?" exclaimed Kurt, his words muffled and bits of cake spraying from his mouth as he spoke. "They throw it out once you're done tasting, might as well enjoy the whole piece! Besides, nobody's ever gonna see me naked again."

"While I appreciate the drama of your statement," said Rachel, her hand still holding tightly to his wrist making his grip on the fork uncomfortable. "I have a hard time believing you'll be celibate."

"I have no choice," exclaimed Kurt, and the people at the other table looked up sharply at them, again. Kurt made a face in their direction before turning back to Rachel. "I said I would stop at twenty and now, because of that idiotic boy and his ridiculous pick-up lines, I've hit twenty."

Kurt paused, closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Just promise me you aren't going to sit me at the singles table," pleaded Kurt.

"Seating is really complicated," Rachel answered nervously.

Kurt's eyebrows pulled together and he was readying a full out rant about seating charts when suddenly the bell dinged signaling that someone had come into the store. He turned in his seat and saw a familiar man step into view. Kurt squinted, trying to place him.

"Rachel," he whispered. "Does that guy look familiar to you?"

She looked up from where she had resumed jotting down notes and tilted her head to the side to regard him.

"Nope," she chirped after a beat and went back to her notes.

Kurt frowned. The man was tall and slim, though his shoulders were broad like a football player. He was well-groomed and well-dressed, his small circle beard trimmed neatly, and his hair styled in a masculine and stylish, if not a little humdrum, cut. Kurt chewed his lip in contemplation before it suddenly hit him and his eyes widened.

"Holy sh... Rachel!" hissed Kurt. "That's Disgusting Don!"

"Disgusting Don?" asked Rachel, amusement sparkling in her eyes.

"We dated."

She looked over at the man as he looked through a book of wedding cakes. Kurt glanced back at him, too. He looked uncomfortable, or perhaps restless like he was waiting for someone.

"Have I ever met him?" asked Rachel.

"No, nobody did," replied Kurt, his mind flitting back to the time he dated Don.

This man wasn't disgusting, but the man he had dated had been. The man he had dated had been nearly twice the size of the man he was looking at right that moment. Kurt knew he was being shallow with the nickname, but he had been the one dating him, he had been the one sucking that fat bastard's dick. So, anyone who thought he was shallow could just fuck off.

"He's kind of cute," said Rachel, tilting her head.

"He's gay, Rachel," hissed Kurt with unbridled annoyance. "And you're here planning your wedding."

"I know," replied Rachel, rolling her eyes. "I'm just saying, he doesn't look disgusting."

"He must have lost a lot of weight," muttered Kurt before speaking up. "I'm almost certain it is him, though."

"Well, go say 'hi'," said Rachel, pushing his shoulder. "See if he remembers you."

"I dunno," replied Kurt. "It'll be awkward."

"No, it could be good," said Rachel, grinning at him.

Kurt sighed, picked up the napkin on the table and wiped his mouth to make sure he wasn't still covered in crumbs from his near emotional breakdown, and pushed up from the table. He moved around the store, trying to look inconspicuous as he approached the other man. He was staring at a yellow fondant-covered cake under a large glass cover when Don spoke.

"Kurt?" he questioned.

Whipping around with a too-bright smile, Kurt pretended to act surprised but he said the other man's name much too quickly and had to internally smack himself for it.

"Don? Wow!" exclaimed Kurt, maybe a bit loudly in the quiet cake shop. "Look at you."

"I know," laughed Don, patting his stomach. "You look great, too."

Kurt preened a little under the compliment, he was about to ask him what he was up to when a tall, dark-skinned and absolutely gorgeous man stepped through the front door capturing both their attentions. He moved with grace, his chest broad but thin, his waist nearly non-existent, and his legs long.

"Hey, Gorgeous," cooed Don and the man stepped into his arms, planting a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

Kurt blanched.

"Who's this?" asked the other man with a polite smile.

"This is Kurt," said Don. "He's a... uh... old friend."

The man nodded at him, reaching out to shake his hand. Kurt attempted a smile in response.

"Kurt, this is Alexandre," said Don, turning to grin dopily at the other man. "My Fiancée."

"Oh, wow, congrats," stammered Kurt, feeling sick to his stomach and very much intimidated by the absolutely gorgeous man who was going to marry his suddenly-attractive ex. "How did... how did you two meet?"

Kurt silently berated himself for the squeak in his voice.

"Conference," the two both spoke at the same time before grinning at each other and leaning in for a quick kiss.

Kurt thought he was going to throw up all the cake he had eaten. He didn't really listen to the full story Don was now regaling him with, but he snapped to attention when he heard Alexandre ask him what he was doing in there.

"Oh!" exclaimed Kurt, grinning too big. "I... uh... am here planning my own wedding."

Don gave him a surprised smile, Kurt forced his face not to frown at that. He knew Don knew him, probably remembered what his face looked like when he was lying, probably never expected him to settle down and get married. It made him want to lie much more convincingly, surprise the hell out of his stupid ex who was now stupidly thin and had a stupid, fucking model for a fiancée and they probably had stupid, amazing sex every night and it was all just stupid.

"I'm marrying a scientist!" said Kurt, faking dreamy eyes. "He's more of a hands-on kind of guy, though. Right now he's up at the North Pole studying the effects of global warming. He has this amazing plan to counteract the entire thing; it is going to be amazing. Anyway, that's why I am here with my... uh... bridesmaid."

Kurt motioned to Rachel who smiled and waved when the three men looked her direction.

"She's helping me pick a wedding cake," finished Kurt.

Alexandre looked convinced and happy for him, but Don was giving him a strange look. Kurt shrugged at him, keeping his sunny smile firmly planted on his face.

-

"I can't believe he introduced me as an old friend," cut out Kurt as he and Rachel strolled away from the bakery, arms linked, and bodies close so they could both fit under the umbrella. "He was acting like I was the embarrassment. He had MAN BOOBS! Man boobs, Rachel; big, hairy ones!"

Rachel nodded her head, speeding up her pace to try to keep up to Kurt's angry steps.

"I can't believe how good he looks now," exclaimed Kurt. "He's so thin, he even looks taller! And his fiancée is a fucking model! How is this fair? Why didn't he look that good when I was dating him? Maybe we would have lasted. Instead he's marrying Alexandre."

Kurt practically spat out the name.

"A lot of men get better with age," said Rachel, matter-of-factly. "I mean, remember what Finn was like in high school? Remember the things he said to you? People change."

Kurt stopped abruptly, and Rachel had to scramble not to lose grip of her precious notebook tucked under her arm.

"You're right!" exclaimed Kurt. "Rachel! You're a genius!"

"Oh, I know," said Rachel fondly. "But what do you mean?"

" I don't have to go celibate or go over twenty! Don can't be my only ex who has gotten better over time," said Kurt, excitement bubbling through his system at the thought. "Ah! I gotta go!"

Kurt kissed Rachel on the cheek, unhooked his arm from hers, and fumbled to press the umbrella handle into her hand while she was still clutching her notebook to her chest. Then he was off, running down the soaked and slippery New York sidewalk, hand out as he hailed for a taxi. He had to get home.

* * *

Here we go again; I kinda want to be more than friends  
So take it easy on me, I'm afraid you're never satisfied  
Here we go again, we're sick like animals, we play pretend  
You're just a cannibal and I'm afraid I won't get out alive  
No, I won't sleep tonight

Blaine's rich voice came through the speakers as the Warblers' YouTube video played on Kurt's computer monitor. Kurt hummed along with it as he rifled through the address books and journals he had collected in a messy pile on his desk.

Oh, oh, I want some more  
Oh, oh, what are you waiting for?  
Take a bite of my heart tonight

"Blaine Anderson, Blaine Anderson," he muttered under his breath as he looked through the phone numbers in his address book. "These are ten years old, there's no way he still has the same phone number."

Kurt groaned in frustration, before looking up just in time to see him making ridiculous faces on the old video of him in the terribly unflattering Dalton uniform. He groaned again, this time in embarrassment as teenager-him did a high-kick and stuck his curled tongue out while he sang. What a fucking mistake. It made him think back to the other horrible mistake he had made around the same time; the mistake which had started a long line of mistakes... twenty to be exact. He groaned and clicked out of the window, instead opening a new window where he typed 'Blaine Anderson' in the search bar.

"Twelve million results?" exclaimed Kurt in disbelief, nearly dropping the wine glass he had been holding. "What? Is he on a TV show or something? His name can't be that common!"

Kurt clicked through a few results; seeing Blaine's father, Jake Anderson's campaign website and grumbling residue hatred for the awful man, before gasping when he came across an article about Blaine on OUT Magazine's website. He quickly clicked the browser window shut, suddenly not willing to see just how fantastically his high school sweetheart's life had turned out.

After taking a few deep breaths to steady himself, Kurt went back to scanning through his old journals for other ideas. He hummed happily when he saw the name 'Gavin Stone' and quickly went to type it into the search engine.

"Seventeen million, seven hundred thousand results," groaned Kurt. "That's even worse than Blaine!"

He opened up facebook to try to search for him that way; still there were way too many results.

"This is going to take forever," he muttered before taking a very large gulp of his wine.

He went back to his search engine and typed in 'Gavin Stone New York', this time he had nearly nine million results. That was still way too much to sift through. Kurt sighed. Then he tried typing in the name of the band Gavin had started back when they were in college, still no help. Kurt went back to his journals and address books, there had to be someone who was simple enough to get in touch with.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali &** lurkdusoleil  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex, Klaine Angst

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did_ take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story.

* * *

Chapter Three

* * *

Kurt woke the next morning with a pounding headache and his face pressed against the keys of his computer's keyboard. He sat up and stared with bleary eyes at his computer screen, tab after tab of dead-ends and too many search results. He rubbed a hand over his face and grumbled to himself about missing his moisturising routine the night before.

In the distance he heard a familiar voice arguing good-naturedly with an unfamiliar one. He furrowed his brow for a moment but then an idea hit him and he jumped from his chair, list of nineteen exes in hand, and ran to his apartment door. He pulled it open in time to see Sebastian, naked again, bending over to get his mail from in front of his own apartment door.

"Hi!" called Kurt, forcing a bright smile while worrying at his appearance after spending the night sleeping hunched over a desk.

Sebastian grinned tiredly at him and opened his mouth to speak when another voice called to him from inside his apartment asking if he had seen his underwear. Kurt tilted his head in interest when Sebastian grimaced and called back that the other guy should look under the bed.

"Morning Princess," replied Sebastian, finally. He held a dish towel over his groin while gripping a half-eaten apple and the rolled newspaper in his other hand.

"Hey, um," started Kurt trying to keep Sebastian's attention as the naked man turned to head back into his apartment, profile of his perfect ass on display. Kurt cleared his throat nervously and Sebastian paused. "I see that you have... company, but I just wanted to ask you a quick question."

"Shoot," responded Sebastian, dropping his newspaper inside his door and turning back to face Kurt. Damn, he had a fantastic v-cut.

"Remember how you said you were really good at digging up dirt?" croaked out Kurt, Sebastian nodded expectantly. "Do you think that maybe I could pay you to find some people for me?"

"Sweetheart, If I'm gonna help you, you're going to have to give me more than that," answered Sebastian, obviously intrigued but attempting to feign nonchalance.

"Just some guys I used to date," fumbled Kurt.

"Oh, you have herpes,"said Sebastian, looking momentarily sympathetic. "That's not a fun phone call to make."

"No, no, no," started Kurt, shaking his head, but then pausing. "Wait... what? You have... Never mind, will you help me?"

Sebastian gave him a funny look, before biting into the apple he was holding and keeping it in his teeth so he could use his hand to close his apartment door.

"I just think that one of these guys might be... worth a second look," said Kurt, feeling nervous and ridiculous under Sebastian's curious scrutiny, even though it was Sebastian who was standing there in the buff with a kitchen towel the only thing covering his dick.

Kurt clenched his eyes shut to keep himself from checking him out as he waited for Sebastian to look over the list. Sebastian hummed and Kurt opened his eyes to glance over at him. Of course, that was the moment Sebastian decided it was necessary to lift the dish towel from where it concealed him to wipe the corner of his mouth, adignified move in the most undignified of scenarios. Kurt's eyes were immediately pulled to the long, gorgeous dick hanging on display. Kurt quickly tore his eyes from the sight and turned beet red when he met Sebastian's amused countenance.

"Stop it," snapped Kurt before shaking the list to return Sebastian's attention to it. "So, what do you think?"

"No," said Sebastian, lifting his chin in exaggeration and stepping with overly embellished movementsback to his apartment door. "I refuse to be part of your type of crazy."

"What?" snapped Kurt.

"I don't know why all these guys broke up with you, but that, sir, is a long list," said Sebastian, twisting the knob of his door and opening it. "Most likely a list of men like myself -my brethren, if you will. I need to protect them."

"Hey!" exclaimed Kurt, affronted. "Why do you just assume they broke up with me?"

"Because you seem like the type of guy who tries to make a bad thing work," said Sebastian, taking another bite of his apple as he leaned against his door jam.

Kurt felt an unnamed emotion clawing up his throat and struggled to suppress it.

"Some people call that optimism," he ventured.

"I call it crazy," responded Sebastian with a shrug.

"I don't know why I even asked," sighed Kurt, annoyance filling his voice. "I knew you'd just be a jerk."

Kurt stalked away, his open apartment door waiting for him.

"Don't be mad," called out Sebastian. "It doesn't mean I won't sleep with you."

Kurt groaned turning to toss a disgusted expression over his shoulder as he reached his door.

"You're gross!" he called out before slamming his door shut.

He could hear Sebastian chuckling and it made him want to pull his hair out. He threw his paper down on the hall table next to his door and frowned at it when it didn't make the bang that he wanted. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall taking deep breaths. He felt overwhelmed. He was contemplating pulling out his last bottle of wine and just spending his day drinking it when a sudden thought flitted through his brain.

He quickly grabbed his coat and ripped his door open, yelling for Sebastian at the top of his lungs as he ran. He fumbled a little with his coat before getting it on just as he reached Sebastian's door.

"Sebastian!" he cried, banging loudly on the apartment door. "Open up!"

A few moments later, Sebastian's door opened to reveal an alarmed and confused, but mercifully, mostly dressed version of his neighbour. Kurt ran past him into his apartment, nearly running into a tall, slim man wearing nothing but bright red briefs.

"Oops, sorry," exclaimed Kurt, not missing a beat as he stepped around him. "Sebastian! Come on! Get dressed! We have to go! It's mom! She... she... slipped and fell in the shower! Yeah! And... she's... she's in the hospital and she's all... wet?"

Kurt grabbed the pair of shoes and jeans on the floor next to the kitchen table that looked to be Sebastian's and turned around to run back to the door, shoving them into Sebastian's arms as he passed him.

"We gotta get over there!" continued Kurt. "They're drying her off as we speak!"

Kurt paused and turned back to the undressed stranger, looked him up and down, the judgmental eyebrow raise he wanted to give the guy nearly ruining his spiel.

"I'm so sorry to cut your visit short," he said at the strange man, instead. "You seem like a very... wonderful person, but we gotta go! I'm sure he'll call you. We really gotta go!"

When Kurt turned back to Sebastian, it was obvious Sebastian was barely containing his amusement. Kurt pushed through the open door, dragging Sebastian with him.

"Lock up when you leave," called Sebastian over his shoulder just before Kurt pulled the door shut and pushed him across the hall into his own apartment.

Sebastian was chuckling when Kurt shut the door behind them.

"Very impressive," said Sebastian, biting the inside of his cheek as if to keep himself from grinning too widely.

"You help me track down my exes," said Kurt, panting lightly from the exertion of his performance. "I'll help you escape yours."

"What happened to protecting your brethren?" asked Sebastian, looking around Kurt's apartment, his jeans and shoes clutched in his arms.

"If those guys can't see you coming," said Kurt with a shrug as he moved to hang up his coat. "I guess they just deserve what they get."

"Oh, Babe," said Sebastian, clicking his tongue and shaking his head. "There's definitely coming involved, and what they get is something that stays with them for a very... very... long... time."

Kurt nodded solemnly.

"Yeah," he answered, giving Sebastian a pained look. "I heard you had herpes."

Sebastian's mouth dropped open and his eyebrows drew together in indignation.

"I do not!" he yelped. "I'll have you know that I am careful and completely clean!"

Kurt cracked a smile, then.

Sebastian sidledup to the open door on the far side of the living room.

"This place really goes on and on, doesn't it?" he asked.

Kurt narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips. Sebastian just smiled.

"And you can use my apartment to hide in," sighed out Kurt in defeat.

As if those were the magic words, Sebastian dropped his clothing to the ground and made a wide gesture with his hands and arms.

"Then, I'm all yours, Babe," he said through that stupid grin that seemed almost always plastered on his smirky face.

"Don't call me Babe," growled Kurt.

* * *

Kurt paid the cashier for both their coffees while Sebastian rocked on his toes next to him. He wondered if Sebastian was doing it just to annoy him and turned to ask him as such when he realized the taller man was doing it to see past him. Kurt turned in the direction of Sebastian's gaze and saw a guy about their age, possibly a few years younger, in jeans and a tight t-shirt, picking up his coffee from down the counter. Kurt glanced back at Sebastian who was quite obviously checking the guy out and quickly smacked him in the shoulder.

"The hell was that for?" asked Sebastian, interrupting his ogling to glower at Kurt.

"Eyes on the prize, sir," said Kurt, chipperly as he slid his wallet back into his bag.

"That's exactly what I was doing," sighed Sebastian, following Kurt to the end of the counter where the hot guy had been. "But now, because of your naggy old lady habits, I can't; you got me all covered in your domestic germs."

"That doesn't even make sense," said Kurt, giving Sebastian a sour look while shaking his head.

"It means, we look like a couple and I would be an ass to go hit on someone with my bitchy girlfriend in sight," cut out Sebastian. "This arrangement isn'tgoing to work if I can't actually take anyone home, you know."

Kurt just rolled his eyes and grabbed his coffee where the barista had placed it on the counter. He stalked across the cafe and sat down at a table by the window. Sebastian followed at a much more leisurely pace. Kurt wanted to scream. Everything about Sebastian made him want to scream... and break things; starting with Sebastian's stupid face.

Sebastian took a seat in front of Kurt at the table. His plaid button-up fit him well, snug in all the right areas, and Kurt had to admit that it suited him despite looking like something from Aeropostale, American Eagle Outfitters, or some other pit of uninspired sartorial hell. Actually, he had to admit that Sebastian looked altogether delicious that morning. It made Kurt want to hate him even more; that Sebastian could be such a dick and an ass and still be sexy as fuck.

"Cool it, Killer," laughed Sebastian when he looked up from where he was stirring his coffee. "You are practically trembling with PMS."

"Hilarious," drawled Kurt. "The homophobic, misogynistic comments are so cutting edge. I've never had anyone liken me to a girl before."

"Yes, well," started Sebastian suddenly looking bored. "Perhaps it has something to do with your gay face and your girl clothes."

"At least I don't dress in Aberdouchey & Fitch," snapped Kurt, before pulling a revised version of his list of exes from his pocket. "Here's the list and all the info I have on the guys; names, old phone numbers, addresses. Find out who is alive, single and still in the East Coast. I'll take a car or a train to see them, but not a plane, and I'm definitely not moving away from my beloved New York."

Sebastian set down his coffee cup from where he had lifted it to his mouth. He took the list from Kurt and began to scan it over as Kurt spoke.

"I prioritized the list so start at the top," finished Kurt.

"Blaine Anderson?" asked Sebastian, reading the first name on the list. "Is he the one who got away?"

"Something like that," answered Kurt, feeling uncomfortable as if his heart were on display for Sebastian's enquiry and subsequent amusement. "His dad is Jake Anderson..." he continued, because he really needed to move the conversation forward.

"THE Jake Anderson?" asked Sebastian, his eyes widening.

Kurt nodded.

"That guy is a real jackass," huffed Sebastian. "His 'traditional values' campaign makes me wanna hurl. He has a gay son? That is pure gold."

"Anyway," cut in Kurt. "He shouldn't be too hard to find since his dad is so famous, or infamous, whatever you want to call it."

"He may not be hard to find, but I guarantee he'll be hard to get to," said Sebastian, wrapping a large hand around his coffee cup and raising it to his lips. Kurt internally slapped himself for staring and wondering how the other man managed to make everything look suggestive. "You don't have a phone number or address or anything like that?"

"If I had that, I wouldn't need you," said Kurt, his voice coming out harsher than he meant.

"I dunno, Babe," purred Sebastian, as if Kurt's annoyance was what brought out his flirtatious side -maybe it was. "We've got a few things in common that would actually lend themselves quite nicely to you needing me."

Kurt rolled his eyes, though his mind instantly supplied him with the images of what Sebastian was suggesting. It made him realize that he really was obsessed with sex and needed to find a match, fast.

"Speaking of which, you should move Gavin Stone up to number three," said Kurt, wickedly pleased when Sebastian looked disappointed with his lack of response to the suggestive comment.

"Why's that?" asked Sebastian.

"Well, he may still only be working at Starbucks and singing lead in a glorified garage band but he was the best sex I've ever had."

Sebastian stared down at the list for a few beats before looking wryly back up at Kurt.

"You haven't had sex with me," Sebastian quipped.

Kurt sighed out a long suffering sigh and gave his head a shake.

"No," he said, gathering his stuff in order to leave the cafe. "But I have had sex with other overconfident, poorly-dressed idiots, so I'm good."

As he strode to the door, Kurt watched out of the corner of his eye as Sebastian quickly fumbled to put the list into his jeans pocket, grab his coffee, and follow after him. The taller man reached his side just as he was stepping onto the sidewalk from the concrete steps.

"What's so wrong with being the lead singer of a band?" asked Sebastian, falling into step beside him.

"Nothing," said Kurt with a shrug. "Depends on the band and the guy, I guess."

"What if I told you I was the lead singer in a band?" asked Sebastian.

Kurt paused to look him over and Sebastian stopped beside him, permitting the examination. After a few moments Kurt raised his eyebrow and shook his head.

"What?" asked Sebastian.

"If you're the lead singer in a band," Kurt finally said. "I'm sure there's something wrong with it."

Sebastian chuckled, shaking his head.

They walked side by side in silence for a few blocks, sipping their coffees and allowing the city sounds to envelop them. Eventually, though, Kurt's peace was interrupted by Sebastian.

"Why not just find a new guy?" asked Sebastian.

"No," said Kurt, adamantly. "No new guys."

"New is always better than old," replied Sebastian, and Kurt had to side-eye him.

"Of course you'd say that," sighed Kurt in exasperation. "The longest relationship you've ever had is with that coffee."

Sebastian stopped abruptly and Kurt almost felt bad for his words, thinking he must have hit a sore spot. He looked back at Sebastian in time to see him grin and, to Kurt's horror, take a disgustingly suggestive pull from his cup while making the most obscene sounds of pleasure. Kurt rolled his eyes and continued forward. He quickened his pace when he heard Sebastian jogging to catch up.

* * *

Kurt was impressed, not for the first time, with the decor of the wedding dress boutique as he waited in the front room with Tina and Diana.

"Wow, are you really gonna let your bridesmaids actually look good for your wedding?" asked Kurt, touching the dark purple dress hanging on the railing. It was simple but classic and Kurt had a hard time believing it was something Rachel picked out.

Rachel stuck her head out from behind the large dressing room curtain to see what he was talking about.

"Oh, no," she said. "That's Carole's dress."

Kurt looked back at the dress as Rachel ducked back into the change room.

"We thought that we'd dress all our parents in dark purples to keep the symmetry in the wedding party, considering I'll have two men in tuxes with me," she called matter-of-factly, though her voice sounded slightly strained like she was having trouble putting her dress on. "Just like we're having Diana stand with the men to counter-act you standing with the women."

Kurt barely repressed the urge to roll his eyes, if he heard the word 'symmetry' in regards to the wedding one more time he... well, he didn't know what he'd do, but it wouldn't be good and it'd probably result in some prison time, or a one-way ticket to a mental facility.

"The bridesmaid dresses are hanging by the counter," finished Rachel.

Kurt's eyes immediately drifted to the counter that held different accessories like hair clips and necklaces. Tina, walked over to it, as curious as Kurt. Beside it, hanging on a stray hook on the wall were two bright plum purple dresses of different cuts but similar styles. Tina pulled the smaller one down and held it up to her shoulders, checking the length. While the colour was rather bright, Kurt had to admit the dresses were quite lovely.

"My dress is this beautiful off-white, crème colour. Champagne, I guess. Anyhow, it is beautiful and it matches the groomsmen's tuxes perfectly," gushed Diana with a little bit of snark which seemed somewhat out of place even for her until the meaning sunk in.

"I think the colour was actually called papayawhip," said Tina, absently as she twirled her dress around with her. "It looks pretty much the same as Champagne to me, but Kurt knows all the differences between these colours; so... papaya whip, Kurt."

Kurt wasn't listening to Tina, though; all the blood had begun rushing around in his head at Diana's words and he suddenly felt dizzy.

"Rachel," he managed to rasp. "What colour is my tux?"

The room went silent. Rachel didn't answer right away which was probably answer enough, but Kurt pressed.

"Rachel?"

"It matches the girls' dresses," she said, her voice timid.

"You mean you've got me in a plum purple tux!?" exclaimed Kurt in disbelief. "I might as well just dye my hair green and paint my face!"

"Kurt," sighed Rachel, before pushing the curtain aside and coming out. "Don't be so dramatic. It doesn't look bad, I promise."

"This coming from the girl who wore animal sweaters, pleated skirts, and knee socks all through high school," breathed out Kurt, pinching the bridge of his nose to try to ward off a headache. "I should have known better than to be in your wedding party."

The topic was immediately dropped, though, when everyone looked up to see Rachel standing in her wedding dress. She was beaming and Kurt couldn't even find it in his heart to be mad at her in that moment. He rushed up the steps to the viewing room to give her a careful hug andspin her around in a circle while the other two women squealed from behind him.

"I know how we had always dreamed of an Audrey Hepburn inspired wedding dress," said Rachel, laughing as she and Kurt danced around the room. "But, I think I might like this one better."

"Oh, Honey," laughed Kurt, giving her another hug before letting her go so he could step back and take her in. "We were just kids with Broadway dreams when we said that. This... this dress is perfect for you."

Rachel smiled brightly at him, her eyes a little misty and Kurt found himself wiping his own eyes. Rachel looked past him and he turned, remembering the other people in the room. Tina's smile was just as wide as Rachel's. She was gripping her fingers together and swinging her hands in excitement. When Kurt stepped out of the way, she ran forward to hug Rachel, too. Diana hung back, but she was smiling fondly, too.

"You look amazing, Rachel," breathed Tina and Kurt was filled with a second bout of emotional nostalgia at getting to share this special event with his best friends who had been there for him since he was a teenager.

"You really do," said Diana, nodding. "This dress is perfect for you."

Everyone was silent for a few moments, staring at Rachel in her dress. Then Rachel broke the quiet with a loud squeal as she threw her hands up in the air.

"I'm getting married!" she cried out and Kurt couldn't help but laugh gaily.

It was then that Kurt's phone pinged with a new text. He stepped aside to pull it from his bag. As he sat down on the grey couch beside the dressing room his eyebrows shot up when he read the text.

"He found Connor Morris," mumbled Kurt to himself.

Rachel paused from fussing with her dress and looked over at Kurt in surprise.

"Wait!" she said, stepping toward Kurt. "Are you tracking down all your ex-boyfriends so you don't have to go over twenty?"

Kurt wanted to curse her for her sudden cleverness.

"What?" gasped Diana, turning to give Kurt a judging look.

"Think about it," said Kurt. "If it works out with one of these guys that means a whole period of my life won't have been an entire waste."

Tina gave him a sympathetic look and he wanted to hate her.

"Yeah, but it didn't work out with any of those guys because they were all wrong for you," argued Rachel.

"Wait, Connor Morris?" asked Tina, sitting down on the seat next to him. "Isn't that the aspiring magician you dated?"

Kurt blanched, his mind flitting back to hazy memories of too much alcohol and a man with dyed black hair, plenty of piercings, charcoal lined eyes, and a lot of ridiculous magic tricks performed at the most inappropriate of times. He couldn't believe he had thought it was sexy. Well, he hadn't thought all of it was sexy, but he had played along because the sex itself had been excellent.

"Maybe he's changed?" hoped Kurt.

Diana rolled her eyes and Tina patted his knee encouragingly. He didn't know which gesture was worse.

* * *

"Wow," said Kurt as he sunk into the seat across the booth from Sebastian. "You work fast!"

"This one was easy," responded Sebastian with a shrug, his eyes looking out over the busy bar, probably scanning for future one night stands. "He has his own website; supersexy "

Kurt's expression fell a little at that, remembering the 'super sexy magic' times he and Connor had together years ago. He chewed his lip and looked around anxiously, suddenly feeling embarrassed. He didn't want Sebastian to see this.

"Well, I'm sure I'll be able to find him in here," said Kurt, twisting his fingers together on the table. "So, you can go, now."

"And miss the show?" asked Sebastian.

Sebastian took a long drink of his beer while Kurt glared at him. When he was finished the drink, he motioned to the bar. Kurt looked just in time to see a man, a touch more clean cut, a bit older,but definitely Connor Morris, pretending to pull a coin from a hot chick's ear in a strange form of flirting. Kurt's stomach rolled with his own humiliation, remembering how that was the very trick that had worked on him.

"Looks like he went straight," Sebastian said absently before raising his beer for another drink.

"No, he's always been bi," answered Kurt, though he was much more worried about the fact that Connor looked like he hadn't changed in the least, despite the haircut and lack of piercings on his face.

"Oh, Princess," laughed Sebastian. "Are you sure he hasn't just always been straight?"

That got Kurt's attention.

"Excuse me?" he asked, snapping his attention away from the ex standing behind the bar.

"Well, you're just so pretty," said Sebastian, grinning from behind the neck of his beer bottle. "Maybe he was confused."

"Okay," breathed out Kurt, his limbs tight with fury. "We're done here."

Kurt was out of the booth in seconds.

"That's it?" called out Sebastian.

Kurt kept walking.

They were out on the street by the time Sebastian caught up with Kurt.

"Aw, Babe," he called out and Kurt stopped, took a deep breath, and turned to face him. "You don't have to have a hissy fit; I was only teasing."

Kurt was momentarily surprised at the apology hidden behind Sebastian's words, but he ignored it and shook his head at Sebastian.

"No," said Kurt. "I just have no use for him. He's still a bartender. He's exactly where he was six years ago –a struggling magician who sleeps until noon, bartends until 3, and goes around pulling money out of people to get them to sleep with him. He keeps your quarter, by the way."

"So what?" asked Sebastian, now walking beside Kurt. "He's still hot! You could have some fun for old time's sake."

"No," answered Kurt, sighing out in frustration. "Even if it doesn't raise my number, I can't afford to waste my time on guys like him."

"Wait, wait, wait," exclaimed Sebastian, grabbing Kurt's arm to halt him. Kurt looked down at where Sebastian's hand was wrapped around his forearm and looked back up at him with a raised eyebrow. Sebastian let him go. "That's what this is about?"

He paused, his eyes sparkling with mischief in the light cast by the streetlamps.

"You don't want to raise your number," he exclaimed, grinning as if the world suddenly made sense again. "That's why you won't sleep with me!"

"No," Kurt adamantly replied. "No, there are a lot of reasons why I won't sleep with you."

"No, there's not," argued Sebastian. "I don't know why some guys worry so much about their number anyway."

"Despite what some people might think of me," said Kurt. "I'm not a slut. I'm just a man looking for love... and obviously looking for it in the wrong places."

Kurt sighed and turned to Sebastian. They paused in stride.

"We're guys, we like to have our fun," said Kurt. "We can sleep around and enjoy ourselves."

"Hell yeah."

"But the moment you want to settle down with someone," continued Kurt, ignoring Sebastian's little cheer. "Suddenly, if his number is too high, a guy's not commitment material."

Kurt closed his eyes, feeling a sudden overwhelming sense of loss come over him.

"I never thought I would be the guy who slept with nineteen people," he whispered.

"Nineteen?" exclaimed Sebastian. "Is that all?"

Kurt broke out of his moment of misery to glare over at Sebastian.

"Yeah, that's all," snapped Kurt. "But I guess for a man-whore such as yourself, that isn't such a big number. How many for you? 99?"

Sebastian laughed.

"I stopped counting years ago," he said with a shrug. "When I was counting, it was for the opposite reason as you."

"Bragging about your conquests?" ventured Kurt.

"Yeah," answered Sebastian with a nod. He actually looked a little bit embarrassed about it, underneath that stupid grin of his. "It started to feel immature after a while, though."

Kurt snorted.

They started walking again. Kurt took a few moments to relish the sounds of his beloved city. The old stone of the backstreet was moist and shining under the lights of the city from the night-time fog, the traffic sounded almost distant in the semi-quiet of the alley, the sounds of people talking and yelling from the front of the bar they left a few blocks behind bounced off the sides of the buildings.

"What kind of guy cares about how many people you've slept with, anyway?" asked Sebastian, eventually.

"Decent guys," Kurt answered immediately. "Ones who don't just want a quick fuck. Ones who want to take you home to their parents and... and buy furniture together."

"So," said Sebastian after a long pause. "You think one of these guys will want to buy furniture with you?"

"I don't know," sighed Kurt. "I just know that I can't go over twenty. I can't let myself become unmarriageable. I just can't."

Sebastian was silent for the rest of the walk back to their apartment plex.


	4. Chapter 4

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali &** lurkdusoleil  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex, Klaine Angst

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did _take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story.

**NOTE:** A very special thank you to obsessivegleekypotterhead for helping me with this chapter.

* * *

**_Chapter Four_**

* * *

Two mornings later, Kurt woke alone; just like he had every day since kicking Benjamin out, (except for that one, horrible morning when he woke with Mr. Twenty in his bed). At first, the familiar pang of loneliness pressed at his chest, a feeling he had lived with almost every day since puberty. But at a few moments of lazing in the peace of his quiet room with no one to impress and no false impressions to make, the knot began to unwind just enough to allow him to breathe properly. Smiling softly, he listened to the cars in the street, the kids playing in the nearby concrete park, the sound of snoring... Kurt sat bolt upright in his bed.

The snoring continued, soft and masculine. Kurt swung his legs out of bed and stood; he inched around the side of his room and peeked down the short hall into the open living room. Lying sprawled out on his couch was Sebastian, mouth hanging open and head resting on Kurt's designer throw pillows.

"Hey!" exclaimed Kurt and Sebastian startled, nearly falling off the couch. "What are you doing?"

"Waiting for..." stammered Sebastian sleepily, his brain obviously still fuzzy from sleep. "Andrew to leave."

"You hooked up with someone in the middle of the week?" asked Kurt incredulously. "Don't you have a job to be at? How do you pay rent? By stealing cash from the wallets of your conquests after they fall asleep?"

"Don't be so crass," grumbled Sebastian, shuffling around on the couch to get more comfortable. "We had a romantic evening together, a very... _romantic_ experience. Then, I told him I had to get up early for a dentist appointment, and now I'm hiding on your couch until he leaves."

Kurt gaped at him for a few beats before shaking it off. Without another word, he stalked off into his bathroom to shower. When he returned showered, teeth brushed and hair styled, dressed in his undershirt, briefs, and a bathrobe, Sebastian was back to dozing.

"You should use this time to do some actual work," said Kurt, grabbing a second throw pillow from his sofa chair to toss at Sebastian's head.

"I _am _working," grunted Sebastian, rubbing a hand over his face. "I set up a Facebook account for you."

Kurt's eye twitched with the knowledge that Sebastian had managed to crack his password and get onto his computer.

"I don't want to be on Facebook," snapped Kurt, so far, he had managed to keep away from the thing for the two decades it had been around and he wasn't planning on being part of it any time soon. "What picture did you use?"

Sebastian grinned sleepily at him before sitting up on the couch and opening Kurt's laptop where it sat on the glass coffee table in front of him.

"The one I just took of you sleeing this morning," answered Sebastian casually.

Kurt groaned.

"I think this is going to be better," said Sebastian, suddenly serious. "While you're looking for them, they can be looking for you."

"Fine," sighed Kurt, moving past Sebastian and up the step into the kitchen. "But I refuse to tweet."

Kurt began looking through his cupboards in order to start his coffee.

"Oh, number seventeen," said Sebastian, halting Kurt's movements. "Trent Partridge has friend requested you. He's tagged you in a few photos and suggested that you become a fan of the Dalton Academy Warblers?"

Kurt nearly dropped the can of coffee grounds he was holding. He spun around, unsure of whether to be touched by Trent or worried at the awkwardness that could ensue from being connected with him online.

"I always liked Trent," he finally managed to say. "He's a sweetheart."

"You don't sound interested," questioned Sebastian, looking up from the computer to glance over his shoulder at Kurt.

Kurt bit his lip and shrugged.

"Oh, there's a story here," said Sebastian, grinning and leaning back on the couch to get a better look at Kurt.

"Where's my coffee pot," Kurt muttered, trying to evade Sebastian's amused but questioning looks.

"I broke it."

"What?" exclaimed Kurt.

"If you were on twitter, you'd already know that," stated Sebastian with an unapologetic shrug.

Kurt glared at him for a few moments before sighing and pulling open the refrigerator door to get out some orange juice instead.

"Oh!" called out Sebastian in delight. "Another familiar name! Wow, this Facebook thing was a really _brilliant_ idea, hey Kurt?"

"Ass," grumbled Kurt under his breath before pouring himself a glass of juice. He cleared his throat then and asked, "So, are you going to tell me who?"

"Ciriaco Finelli," said Sebastian, his eyebrows rising at the name. "Not a common first name."

Kurt hummed in response, walking around the couch to sit down next to Sebastian. He lightly pushed Sebastian's hand away from the laptop so he could click on the man's photo.

"He was after I broke up with Disgusting Don," said Kurt. "I worked really hard to lose the weight I gained while dating Don and... Ciriaco definitely noticed."

The profile photo was a headshot of an incredibly attractive Italian man with tan olive skin, a strong jaw, and deep dimples in his smiling cheeks. It had been taken at the beach; his hair was wet and his skin shining with moisture, with a long blue expanse of ocean and sky behind him. What could be seen of his chest and shoulders gave a good impression of how fit and muscled the young man was. Sebastian whistled his appreciation.

"You hooked up with _that_ and you're bringing guys like _Chandler_ back to your place?" asked Sebastian. "Kurt, you've hit a serious slump."

"Chandler was a mistake," grumbled Kurt. "Ciriaco... was a dream."

"A fucking wet dream," groaned Sebastian and Kurt gave him a disgusted look.

"He was visiting from Italy a few years ago and he was just so adorable," said Kurt dreamily as he clicked open the album of photos.

"Huh," said Sebastian, squinting at the screen. "So are his wife and _teenaged_ kids."

"That can't be right," breathed Kurt, suddenly feeling light-headed as he clicked through photo after photo of Ciriaco and his family.

"Closeted men," sighed Sebastian. "Freaky in the sack but even freakier..."

"Shut the fuck up," snapped Kurt, jumping to his feet and stomping to his front door. "If you don't start taking this more seriously, you're fired from using my apartment!"

He pulled on his jacket and pulled open his door. The resulting bang when he slammed it back shut behind him wasn't nearly as satisfying as he had hoped. Muttering angrily to himself, he stormed down the stairs and out the front door, he needed some coffee and, because of stupid Sebastian, he would have to head to a cafe for an outrageously overpriced cup.

* * *

After a few hours of retail therapy which was mostly just window-shopping considering he was currently unemployed, Kurt was feeling better. It wasn't his fault Ciriaco had cheated on his wife with him. How was Kurt to have known? He would ensure it never happened again, though. There wouldn't be a chance for it to happen again because Kurt wasn't doing any more hook-ups, he was going to stop wasting his time and squandering his love. He was going to find his match and get his life together and everything would be okay. There was no need for him to be upset over Ciriaco Finelli.

He climbed the stairs of his apartmentplex with a determined gait and a decided expression on his face. No more being lonely and desperate, no more letting life screw him over, Kurt Hummel was going to get his life back on track starting with his love life. He heard music and it got louder with every flight. When he glanced up, he saw Sebastian leaning on the railing and grinning down at him, a white cardboard take out box in one hand and chopsticks in the other. Kurt wondered how Sebastian knew he was coming, if he had been watching and waiting for him, but he pushed it aside and instead gave him a condescending look.

"You owe me 19.95," he called out, hoisting the coffee pot box up for Sebastian to see.

"How about I pay you back in Chinese?" asked Sebastian, not missing a beat. "I ordered Golden Dragon."

"Did you get those itty bitty spare ribs?" countered Kurt, pausing on a step.

Sebastian lifted one from the take out box with his chopsticks to show Kurt.

"Okay," conceded Kurt. "I'll be there in five minutes.

Kurt was quick to put away his things from his day of shopping and change into a pair of yoga pants, and then go across the hall to Sebastian's apartment. He considered knocking on the door, but ultimately decided against it, instead taking a deep breath and opening the door.

"Hey," he said as he stepped into Sebastian's apartment, the source of the music he had heard earlier.

"Hey," called back Sebastian, grabbing a remote from his kitchen counter and turning down the loud music before going back to dishing out their dinner. "Come on in."

Kurt walked slowly through the apartment. The only other time he had been there had been when he was trying to save Sebastian from a one night stand who had outstayed his welcome. Now, though, he wasn't running around yelling things about mothers in bathtubs, and could actually take the place in. The decor was seriously lacking and there was music equipment in a few corners, perhaps Sebastian had been serious about being in a band. One wall of the living room was completely covered in a row of three bookshelves which were bursting with CDs and books.

As Kurt stepped further into the room, he saw the main wall had poster paper tacked up with an organizational chart drawn on it and Kurt's list of exes tacked to the side.

"Wow," gasped Kurt, eyes roving over the chart, taking in all the information written under each name and the obvious amount of work put into the whole thing.

"Yeah," said Sebastian, appearing in the living room beside him and handing him a beer. Kurt narrowed his eyes at the bottle as if it might bite him but accepted it, daintily. "My dad wanted me to get a degree in business. They really liked charts and graphs there."

"Impressive," Kurt said simply.

Sebastian left him to grab their plates of Chinese takeout from the kitchen counter. He set them on the dark wood coffee table in the living room and they sat down on the floor to eat.

"So, I think they messed up our mail again and put your copy of Vogue in my mailbox," started Sebastian as he pushed his food around on his plate with his chopsticks.

"Nope," answered Kurt, promptly. "Impossible."

"Oh yeah?" asked Sebastian, looking up from his food in challenge.

"Yeah," responded Kurt, staking a spring roll violently before smiling sweetly at Sebastian.

"Why?"

"Because I don't have a subscription to Vogue," replied Kurt before taking a bite of the roll.

Sebastian scoffed at that.

"As if I would pay to have my magazines manhandled and covered in postal stickers," said Kurt, shaking his head. "No, I buy each issue from the newsstand down the block the day it comes out. I'm surprised this latest edition would even fit in your mailbox."

"Huh."

Kurt watched as Sebastian distractedly opened his folder with one hand and began spreading some of the papers in it out across the floor next to them.

"Did you really get an issue of Vogue in your mailbox?" he finally ventured.

"No. I was just looking for a reason to bring it up again," admitted Sebastian.

"Huh," breathed Kurt, mirroring Sebastian's earlier noise.

"It amuses me that a grown man has what looks to be every single issue of Vogue for the past ten years lovingly displayed on a shelf in his living room," explained Sebastian with an evil glint in his eye.

"Thirteen years," corrected Kurt with a lift of his chin.

"Not helping your case, Babe," laughed Sebastian.

Kurt took a few more bites of his food. He repressed the urge to grin as he felt Sebastian's expectant eyes on him. He remained silent.

"You didn't tell me not to call you Babe," said Sebastian, as if reminding him of the line he missed in a play.

"Maybe I don't mind it anymore," said Kurt with a shrug.

"Well, that just takes all the fun out of it," grumbled Sebastian.

Kurt did grin, then. Sebastian narrowed his eyes at him, trying to look upset but mostly just looking fond.

"So," said Sebastian, breaking their strange moment of staring as he pushed through a few papers he had scattered out on the floor. "Jesse St. James is married."

Kurt made a disgruntled sound at that, remembering how fantastic the young man had been in bed. He had especially enjoyed him when he was giving head, his mouth too full of cock for him to keep talking about himself like he so incessantly did.

"As is Cameron White," continued Sebastian. "Marcus Matson moved to Arizona and Evan Stahl is over in Montana."

"Montana?" exclaimed Kurt in surprise. "What the hell for?"

Sebastian shrugged, making a face like '_why does anyone do anything?_'

"Plum sauce?" he asked, lifting a little packet.

"Yes, please," said Kurt, lifting a dumpling in his chopsticks and holding it out to Sebastian to squeeze the packet over.

"Anything on Blaine Anderson yet?" asked Kurt after taking a bite from the dumpling.

"No," sighed Sebastian and Kurt grumbled. "I'm sorry, but I told you; rich people are very good at protecting their privacy. But be patient, I'll get him. What about Adrien Desjardins?"

Kurt perked at the name.

"He's separated and his house just went on the market," explained Sebastian before taking a long drink from his beer. "So, I'm guessing they aren't getting back together anytime soon; a divorce may be imminent."

"Huh," exhaled Kurt, thoughtfully, even while looking down at his own beer with distaste. "Okay. I'll give Adrien another try."

"Adrien," said Sebastian in a terrible mock-French accent.

"So, I need a plan," said Kurt thoughtfully, ignoring the teasing. "Oh, I know! I'll figure out what law firm he is using and then I could get a job there as an assistant or something. Your dad's a lawyer right?"

"Or," cut in Sebastian, stopping Kurt from snowballing. "We keep it simple and you just go to his open house."

"Huh," said Kurt nodding. "Yeah, that might be better."

He noticed Sebastian roll his eyes and shake his head out of the corner of his eye. It made him chuckle at his own ridiculousness.

"You can just shut your mouth," snapped Kurt, grinning.

"I didn't say _anything_," laughed Sebastian, holding up his hands in surrender.

Kurt eyed him carefully before quickly snitching a lonely spring roll from Sebastian's plate.

"Hey!"

* * *

That weekend, Kurt found himself walking down a cobblestone backstreet with Sebastian as the taller man babbled on from between bites of his sandwich giving Kurt ridiculous advice on how to 'woo' a newly divorced man. They had stopped for lunch at a bistro on the way, and Sebastian had insisted they would have time for the soup _and _sandwich he had ordered. He had time to eat the soup, but was now working on finishing the sandwich as they walked. Kurt muttering 'I told you so's' under his breath.

They crossed the street, Kurt dazzled by the quiet neighbourhood with large oak trees and heritage brick homes, Sebastian still talking about blow jobs and mind blowing sex that keeps them oblivious to the fact that they are falling in love with their pursuer until they are in too deep. They paused in front of the joined stairs of two townhouses, the 'open house' sign pointing them there. One of the doors was standing ajar, so, after shrugging at each other, Sebastian and Kurt walked to that door.

"Wow, this is nice," breathed Kurt, looking around as they stepped into the entry. "Adrien's doing well."

"I wonder where the realtor is," said Sebastian, heading to the staircase.

He dropped his sandwich unceremoniously on the hall table between the staircase and the front door before running up the stairs.

"Hello?"

Kurt rolled his eyes as the other man disappeared upstairs, and then began wandering around the main floor, taking in everything even though he wasn't really there for the house. He caught sight of a picture in a frame on the mantel in the living room that had his eyebrows drawing together in surprise. Why would Adrien have a photo of his ex, Don, and Don's stupid model fiancée?

"Don?" he whispered aloud as he stepped closer and picked up the picture frame.

Mystified, he slowly turned around as he examined the photo, vainly hoping for an explana - and nearly collided with Don, who had just stepped into the open door of the house laden with a brown paper bag of groceries. Kurt shrieked. Don nearly fell on the floor.

"Kurt!" exclaimed Don, scrambling to tighten his grip on his groceries. "What the hell!? What are you doing in my home?"

"Uh..." stammered Kurt, looking around with the sudden realization that he was in Don's house. "The door was open... so, I just... assumed this was the open house."

"No, no," said Don, his face a mixture of annoyance and recovering surprise. "This-this is my house."

"Oh, well..." Kurt laughed nervously, searching his brain for something to say. "My fiancée and I are looking to buy a place... you know, for when he gets back from the North Pole."

Kurt slowly walked toward the front door, getting ready to make a break for it.

"Hey, Kurt," called Don. "Can I go ahead and get that picture back from you?"

Kurt glanced down at the frame still in his hand and let out another sheepish chuckle before setting it down on the hall table next to Sebastian's sandwich._ Sebastian_... Shit! He glanced up the stairs and bit his lip before turning another apologetic smile to Don and quickly stepping through the door.

Kurt stood in the street biting his thumbnail as he waited for Sebastian, not really knowing what to do. He startled when he heard a kafuffle inside Don's house and then suddenly Sebastian burst forth into the street, eyes wide and a stupid grin on his face. Kurt had actually imagined Sebastian smooth-talking his way out of it, but couldn't help but grin back at him when the tall young man nearly fell down the concrete front steps in a hurry to get to him.

"What the fuck?" cried out Sebastian, breathlessly.

"That was Disgusting Don's house!" replied Kurt, throwing his arms out as he spoke, still unsure of what had happened. Had they mixed up contacts somehow? But that still didn't explain the Open House sign.

"He didn't look disgusting to me," said Sebastian. "Well, the blur of him I saw."

"Well, he was when I dated him," snapped Kurt. "What did he say to you?"

"Nothing," said Sebastian. "I flushed the toilet to distract him and then ran."

"Flushed the toilet to distract him?" repeated Kurt in disbelief. He stared at Sebastian like he was insane before shaking it off. "Anyway, I don't know what happened but that was definitely not... There he is!"

Kurt looked over Sebastian's shoulder to see Adrien stepping out of the other side of the townhouse, trotting down the steps as he slid his sunglasses on. Kurt let out a soft puff of air in surprised appreciation of the other guy's appearance.

"He looks good," breathed Kurt.

Sebastian swung around beside him, obviously checking him out.

"Okay, well, thanks, you can go now," said Kurt before giving Sebastian a small shove.

"I'm good," said Sebastian, eyes still on Adrien, so Kurt shoved him harder.

"I can take it from here," said Kurt, pushing his shoulder into Sebastian's side. "So, why don't you just get lost."

"Don't shove me, Gayface," grunted Sebastian, bumping him with his hip.

Kurt pushed and Sebastian pushed him back, letting out a low chuckle at Kurt's frustration. Kurt pushed him and stepped on his foot, hoping desperately that he would just leave.

"Kurt?" called out Adrien, when their little match caught his attention.

Kurt could feel all the blood drain from his face, knowing he would have to talk to Adrien with Sebastian present. He took a deep breath and smiled brightly at Adrien as the man walked toward them.

"Kurt," he said again as he drew close. "Ees eet reelly you?"

Sending a quick glare Sebastian's way, Kurt reached to take Adrien's hand. His memory going back to the moment he had met Adrien at a restaurant he had waited at for a year back in college. Adrien had complained to him how he was so very homesick for Quebec and would give anything for something to remind him of home.

"'ello," Kurt greeted him in a mock French Canadian accent. "Adrien, I can't believe it! What are ze chances I would run eento you?"

He glanced sideways just in time to see Sebastian's face scrunch up with barely contained laughter.

"Eet ees wunderful to see you!" exclaimed Adrien, gesturing with the sunglasses in his hand.

"It _is_ wonderful, isn't it!" exclaimed Sebastian, obviously needing an out for the noise building in his throat.

Adrien cocked his head to the side and looked Sebastian up and down as if seeing him for the first time.

"Dis ees Sebastian," said Kurt, not wanting Adrien to get any information from Sebastian or to think they were together. "He's… my neighbour. And he was just going, weren't you?"

"Yeah," laughed Sebastian but not moving to leave. "Sure."

Adrien gave Sebastian a funny look, obviously not understanding Sebastian's amusement.

"Good to meet you," said Adrien, sparing a few glances to Sebastian but really more interested in Kurt.

Kurt tried not to be too obvious in his preening.

"Wow," Adrien finally vocalized. "I'm sorry, but, Kurt, were you reelly dis gorgeous when we were dah-ting?"

"Oh… I… vell…" Kurt stammered out random words and sounds, unsure of what to say but so very pleased at Adrien's words. He caught Sebastian rolling his eyes and repressed the urge to stick his tongue out at him.

"Look, Kurt," said Adrien, glancing back over his shoulder for a second. "Dey are showing my 'ouse so I need to make myself scarce for duh next 'our. Would you like to do someting? Take one coffee somewhere, per'aps?"

"I vould love zat!" exclaimed Kurt, turning a smug smile on Sebastian. "Goodbye Sebastian."

Sebastian grinned, still so obviously amused with the entire thing, and waved. Kurt and Adrien linked arms and walked away.

* * *

"Cross Adrien off the list," said Kurt with a defeated sigh as he dumped his bag on the couch and flopped down. He wasn't even going to ask why Sebastian was in his apartment.

"Awww," cooed Sebastian, unsurprised. "What happened?"

"Hey, don't judge me, I was nineteen and lonely... and you saw him," snapped Kurt before letting his head fall back against the top of the couch.

Sebastian made a noise of agreement.

"When we met I was in college," explained Kurt. "And I was an active member of the theatre club there, so it was a lot easier for me to mimic other accents at the time, but now..."

"Not so much," supplied Sebastian.

Kurt groaned and ran a hand over his face.

"Not so much," he agreed. "About halfway through dinner I started sounding like Jean Chrétien."

"John who?"

Kurt rolled his eyes.

"So when I tried to pull out of it," continued Kurt. "I panicked and went full Borat."

Sebastian chuckled and leaned back in the chair he was sitting in. Kurt gave him a half-hearted glare.

"After that, things just went downhill," Kurt sighed miserably. "Okay, so, who else do we have?"

"Let me order a pizza and we can _tête-à-tête_," offered Sebastian slyly before getting up to make the call.

Kurt wanted to snap at him for his teasing but he was tired and embarrassed from the outing and Sebastian _was _offering to feed him, yet again.

"Not meatlover's or pepperoni or any other type of blue-collared, artery-plugging crap," called Kurt. "And make it a flat crust."

"Yes, _Dear_," answered Sebastian.

* * *

Kurt admired the lights of the city below and all around them from the roof of their apartment building. Sebastian lounged on the old chesterfield sitting against the wall of the stairwell, looking over Kurt's well-worn list.

"I thought we weren't allowed up here," said Kurt, wrapping his sweater tighter around himself to ward off the chill of the night air. "Didn't you get the memo?"

"I wrote the memo," said Sebastian with a shrug.

Kurt's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open.

"It was getting kind of crowded and my band and I practise up here," he explained and it gave Kurt enough time to get over his shock and turn his facial expression back into a judgmental look.

"I don't know why I'm even surprised at your asshattery at this point," sighed Kurt, lifting the lid of the pizza box and pulling out a slice of flat crust pizza covered in exotic toppings. "It knows no bounds."

Sebastian scoffed.

Kurt pushed his feet off the couch and sat down beside him.

"So, where does your band play?" asked Kurt.

"Here," said Sebastian, as if Kurt were an idiot.

"You said you _practised _here," said Kurt, rolling his eyes. "Where do you play? Some grungy basement bar in the side streets of the city?"

"We're not that kind of band," said Sebastian before taking a big bite of his pizza.

"One that gets gigs and makes money?" asked Kurt.

"Let's just drop it," muttered Sebastian before setting down his slice of pizza and picking up the list sitting in his lap. "So, we have eight guys left if you don't include that Chandler guy and Mr. We-Can-Still-Hook-Up."

"Yeah," sighed Kurt. "I'm definitely not calling either of them."

"How about Collin Gerson," asked Sebastian, reading his name from his notes. "He's in Miami now and I know that's not ideal but he _is_ a doctor."

Kurt hummed thoughtfully but shook his head.

"No, I hate Miami," he finally said. "Too much sun makes people stupid."

"Okay, how about Tyler McCaul?" asked Sebastian. "He's in Denver now but has a caboose worth relocating for."

"Pass," sighed Kurt. "He always wanted to breathe fresh air. Camping, hiking, bicycling... Do you know how exhausting it was to pretend to enjoy the outdoors with that kind of enthusiasm?"

"More exhausting than pretending to be French?" asked Sebastian.

"French Canadian," amended Kurt. "And at least I never had to sleep on the ground and ruin my Marc Jacobs collection with campfire smoke and bug spray when I was pretending to be a Francophone."

"Touché."

They both took a few bites of pizza while they mulled that over.

"What about Brett Murray?" asked Sebastian after a few moments. "He's unemployed –I'm guessing that's why he's single... hey! You're unemployed and single, too! You would make a great match."

Kurt would have had plenty of things to say in response to Sebastian's remarks, but the memory of one Brett Murray was too vivid and upsetting to allow him any other thought.

_"Are you on anything?" asked Brett who had been paired up with Kurt in class. "Cuz this is trippy."_

_"You smell homeless, Brett," replied Kurt. "Homeless."_

"He was my first... mistake," admitted Kurt, groaning and covering his face with his hands. "I had this huge crush on this one guy I had just met but he kept pushing me into the friendzone. I tried so many things to get his attention and he was either not interested or just really oblivious. My self esteem took a few hard blows because of it and Brett was just ...there... and... willing."

Kurt looked up in time to see Sebastian giving him a thoughtful look. There was something almost like sympathy in his eyes. It was an emotion Kurt was getting really good at discerning from people's facial features considering how often it was directed at him as of late; he really didn't want to see it on Sebastian's face.

"I don't want to go out with Brett Murray," Kurt snapped at him. "Where is Blaine Anderson!?"

"Turkey," said Sebastian.

Kurt paused and looked down at the pizza in his hand. It took him a few moments to realize Sebastian was speaking of the country, but when the realization hit him, it still seemed odd. He leaned closer to Sebastian on the couch to see the page where Sebastian's information on Blaine was written down.

"He's overseeing the building of a school there with his family's philanthropic foundation," said Sebastian before looking up from the page at Kurt.

Kurt realized he had probably leaned a little too far into Sebastian's space than what was acceptable and quickly moved away, blushing.

"Okay," said Kurt, for lack of anything better.

Sebastian smirked at him.

* * *

**A/N:** You can find me on tumblr! My username is _idareu2bme_ and all my Number Twenty related posts are tagged _fic: Number Twenty_


	5. Chapter 5

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali & lurkdusoleil**  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex,_ Klaine Angst_

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did _take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story.

* * *

**_Chapter Five_**

* * *

Sunday morning, Kurt found himself strolling through Central Park beside Sebastian and enduring a running commentary of snide observations about each person they passed. It reminded him of the people-watching he and Blaine would do at the mall back in Ohio. They would sit together after a busy morning of shopping, pretzels in hand, and Blaine would nod at a particular person walking by and together they would invent an elaborate life story. It was cute and _romcom_and Kurt had loved it. Remembering it now made him feel melancholy. It didn't last, though. Not with Sebastian leaning over to quietly comment on a large woman's leggings and ask Kurt how he imagined she had even managed to pull them on that morning.

They followed the wide path into an area less populated. There were more trees there, less people, and a large pond. Sebastian enthusiastically but wordlessly pointed at some ducks and ducklings in the reeds and Kurt had to work to hold back his bright grin. The softer side of Sebastian might not be _that _soft compared to the rest of humanity, but it was adorable in its own right.

"So, if this Blaine Anderson is so perfect," asked Sebastian, once they had continued on from the ducklings. "Why did you break up?"

Kurt's stomach suddenly felt heavy.

"Well," said Kurt after a long pause and a deep breath. "He was my first boyfriend, back in highschool. I had a huge crush on him from the moment we met."

"Okay," said Sebastian, prompting Kurt to explain further.

"Well, when we first became friends, we were virgins," said Kurt, nervous and awkward and heart still very sore at the memory. "He, um, he knew that about me because of an incident at school with some idiot guy that resulted in me sadly telling Blaine the guy was my first kiss. Anyhow, we got together about half a year later and it was this big deal to him that we were each other's firsts... and... well... one of us wasn't a virgin anymore by that time."

"You... you got with someone else even while madly crushing on this Blaine Anderson character?" asked Sebastian, eyebrows rising in surprise.

Kurt had a moment of residual annoyance at Sebastian's surprise, memories of comments on gas pains and baby penguins flitting through his mind. But, then he realized that Sebastian's first impressions of him were his breakup with a pig-headed guy who offered to still fuck regularly, and the morning after a one-night-stand. Suddenly, Sebastian's surprise seemed sweet. It was almost like he was the only one who could still see the hopeless romantic Kurt had once been, even if Sebastian had never even met that boy.

"Yeah," said Kurt sheepishly.

"Which of the twenty could possibly be better than Blaine Anderson and why aren't we looking for him?" asked Sebastian, incredulously.

"Remember how I said Brett Murray was my first mistake?" asked Kurt, grimacing. "He was actually my first, first, too."

"Brett Murray?" exclaimed Sebastian. "You broke up with Blaine Anderson over Brett Murray!? That unemployed pothead?"

"Yes," mumbled Kurt, covering his face with his hands in humiliation though he couldn't help but smile along with Sebastian as the other man guffawed loudly, which was a strange new oddity considering how much that highschool break-up still hurt.

"Oh, Kurt," sighed Sebastian, wiping a tear of mirth from his eye. "I underestimated you; that is amazing."

Kurt groaned.

"That," said Sebastian, turning to look him in the eye. "That's my new favorite thing about you."

Kurt laughed despite himself and punched Sebastian in the shoulder.

"Shut up," he commanded, though it probably didn't hold much authority since he was giggling.

* * *

There was no stopping the ridiculously wide smile that spread across Kurt's face when he stepped into the high-end New York restaurant and caught sight of his father's back. Even dressed in his best, Burt Hummel looked ridiculously out of place and so very much like an oasis in a desert of snobby, rich business people and forward thinking New Yorkers. No matter how long Kurt had lived there, no matter how long he had spent before that _wishing _he lived there, New York didn't have anything on the sense of home Kurt felt every time he looked at his father.

"Dad," breathed Kurt as he approached the table where his family was seated.

"Hey, Kiddo," was Burt's familiar answer as he stood from the table to wrap Kurt in a big, fatherly, bear-hug.

The others were used to Kurt only having eyes for his father and knew to wait for the exchange to play out before even trying to greet him themselves. Kurt loved the safety of his father's arms and lingered there in the embrace. He didn't care that he was 29, he really needed this comfort.

When they broke apart, Burt gave Kurt a concerned look but Kurt just smiled benignly before turning to warmly greet Carole. He half-hugged Rachel and Finn, who were in their seats, while Rachel, leaned in for a kiss on the cheek.

"So, Rachel," said Carole as the group looked over their menus. "I was talking to the caterer and he had plenty to tell me about his plans for your _strictly _vegan supper."

Kurt hid a smirk behind his hand as both Finn and Burt groaned.

"He came up with this main dish involving eggplant that he's really excited about," continued Carole, not missing a beat as she lightly smacked Burt on the shoulder. "It will not only be hearty, but it will match the purple colour scheme."

Kurt felt his composure slipping even more and quickly raised his glass of water to his mouth in an attempt to cover his indelicate snort.

"Speaking of which," said Carole, turning from grinning excitedly with Rachel to face Kurt. "Kurt, Honey, does your boyfriend have any allergies?"

Kurt blanched.

"Oh, he broke up with Benjamin weeks ago," said Rachel with a flip of the hand.

"What?" asked Carole and Burt in unison.

Kurt wanted to hide under the table.

"_Rachel_," hissed Finn.

"What?" asked Rachel quietly. "Was it a secret? Kurt should have told them by now."

"He can't when you do it first," muttered Finn and Kurt _really _loved his brother in that moment.

"Kurt," sighed Burt .He looked so disappointed. Kurt felt sick. "Again?"

"The gay community in NYC doesn't seem all that keen on monogamy, so it seems," Kurt mumbled by way of explanation.

Finn winced sympathetically while Rachel and Carole gave him matching sad smiles. Burt, however, just looked pained.

"Are you talking about him or you?" he asked.

Kurt's jaw fell open.

"Burt," gasped Carole.

"Dad," exclaimed Kurt. "Of course it was him. You _know _me! You know I wouldn't..."

"I don't know if I do, Son," sighed Burt. "I always figured you as more of a... commitment kind of guy. I know you were young, but when you brought that Anderson boy home back when you were in high school, I kind of figured you two were in the real deal. The way you looked at each other..."

"Dad," sighed Kurt, his heart aching at the memories and his father's disappointment in him.

"I know it is a sore spot, I'm sorry," said Burt, in a low voice so the other tables wouldn't hear. "I still don't understand why you two even broke up. And ever since... it just... Kurt, it seems like it has been boy after boy ever since... and not a single one have you deemed worth bringing home to meet us. I'm not stupid and you're not seventeen anymore; I know you aren't just going out to coffee with these guys."

Kurt was beginning to feel dizzy as the room started to move around him as the look in his father's eyes smashed at his already sore heart. His father's way-too-true words smashed into his heart.

"I'm sorry, Kurt," said Burt with a sad sigh, but his words sounded far away with the rushing sound circling Kurt's head. "I don't mean to upset you. I just think that... if you don't want to show them off to your family, then they shouldn't be worth your time. I just want you to be happy. I look at you and I remember the talk we had after I got out of the hospital, you remember? After the whole Finn problem? He was asking you to stay away from that new kid? You asked me why you didn't get to have someone... Kurt, I just want you to have someone... but someone worth being with you."

Humiliated, Kurt glanced over at Finn and could see the guilt on the other man's face as he obviously was recalling the incident Burt was talking about. Kurt looked down at the leather-bound menu still in his hands. His knuckles had turned white as his grip on it increased throughout his father's spiel.

"I know, Dad," croaked Kurt, finally. "I want that, too."

The luncheon wasn't the most cheerful of gatherings after that, no one being able to recover from Burt's quiet but long-winded outburst. Finn left with Burt and Carole to help them find their way back to their hotel. Even after having kids living in the city for eleven years, the two were nearly hopeless in navigating the city on their own. Puck had arrived the day before and was staying in the same hotel, so Finn planned on spending the rest of the day with him after escorting his parents. Kurt had no doubt that they would be getting into some form of trouble.

Rachel stood on the sidewalk next to Kurt, waving as they left in the yellow taxicab.

"I'm so sorry, Kurt," said Rachel, once the cab was out of sight. "He was so incredibly out of line to say all that in front of everyone and in public at our family luncheon, no less."

"Thank you, Rachel," sighed Kurt. "But it was a long time coming."

"Still, it isn't his place to criticize your love life, you're an adult."

"He's just worried about me," replied Kurt before offering Rachel his arm so they could stroll down the street companionably. "I'll talk to him when I get back."

"Where are you going?" asked Rachel.

"Miami," replied Kurt. "For a prostate exam."

"What!?"

"Do you remember Collin Gerson?" asked Kurt.

"The guy who blew you while you rode our decrepit old washing machine?" asked Rachel.

Kurt laughed, his face heating at the embarrassing memory of Finn walking in on them in the laundry room at his and Rachel's old place.

"Yeah," groaned Kurt. "I had forgotten about that."

"Finn sure hasn't," exclaimed Rachel. "He's refused to do the laundry ever since."

"Oh, Hun," chuckled Kurt. "That was eight years ago, aren't you sure he just doesn't want to do the laundry?"

"I don't know, Kurt," said Rachel. "He was pretty freaked out."

Kurt laughed again.

"So, what does this have to do with Miami? And why do you need to go all the way down there for a prostate exam?"

"He's a proctologist now," explained Kurt. "He has an office in Miami."

"But you hate Miami," argued Rachel.

"I know," sighed Kurt. "But I'm not having as much luck locally as I hoped and I'm running out of time."

"So, you're telling me that tracking down your ex-boyfriends is more important than helping your best friend plan her wedding?" asked Rachel. "We're only days away from the big day and I need my best gay's support."

Kurt cringed at being called her 'best gay' but still gave her arm a little apologetic pat.

"There's still nearly two weeks until your wedding, Rachel," he said. "And I know this sounds stupid to you, but it is important to me. I feel like everyone else is moving on with their lives except for me. Everyone has someone except for me. when will I get my epic romance, Rachel? When will it be my turn?"

"Kurt," said Rachel, stopping him so she could level him with a serious expression. "I'm all for moving on and I want you to find that special someone, but this whole quest of yours... well, it feels a little bit crazy. I don't think you are going to get what you want from it. All those guys you were with, those relationships; they didn't work out because those guys weren't right for you."

"Rachel," said Kurt. "If you hadn't given your ex a second chance... repetitively, we wouldn't even be planning this wedding. "

Rachel sighed in defeat and let go of Kurt's arms.

"I'll see you when I get back from Miami," said Kurt before leaning in to kiss her cheek.

"Travel safe," Rachel offered weakly.

Kurt smiled brightly at her before turning on his heel and jogging off into the crowd. Perhaps Collin Gerson would be the one and he wouldn't have to be a disappointment to his father any longer.

* * *

Kurt was miserable. Two days and all his saved air miles later, he found himself stumbling back into his apartment heavy laden with his bag and the personal humiliation of knowing he had been so desperate as to fly all the way to Miami. He let his bag fall to the floor and then plopped down on his couch, hissing when his sunburnt arms touched against the leather. The moment he had sat down, his apartment door opened and Sebastian walked through with an expectant look on his face.

"He recognized my ass!" exclaimed Kurt before letting his head fall back against the couch.

"What?"

"Collin!" replied Kurt. "When he first came into the room, I was all '_Oh My G*d, Collin!?_' and he looked so lost. I told him we dated in college and he just stared blankly at me. He didn't recognize me at all, Sebastian! But the moment my _ass_was on display, he remembered me! He remembered me for my ass!"

"It _is_a pretty fine ass," tried Sebastian, mischievously.

"Cross Collin off the list!" exploded Kurt before throwing an arm over his face. "You know what? Cross the list off the list... Rachel's right. This is ridiculous. I'm broke and unemployed and I'm spending all my time tracking down these _assholes _that it didn't work out with the first time. That's it, I'm just going to quit."

"That's too bad," said Sebastian with a shrug. "Because I found David Moore."

Kurt stilled. He slowly removed his arm from over his face and then sat up.

"Keep talking."

"He's in D.C. like you thought," said Sebastian. "He's working as Senator Fleming's aide."

"Oh," said Kurt, smiling softly to himself. "Good for him. Sounds like everything is coming together for him just as he had planned."

Sebastian tipped his head to the side as he regarded Kurt quizzically.

"Sorry, it's just," stammered Kurt, feeling awkward and a little melancholy. "When we first met, he was just finishing university and had all these plans to storm D.C... I guess he is."

"That's good, isn't it?" asked Sebastian.

Kurt's brow wrinkled in confusion.

"Yes," he said carefully.

"Then why did you face go so quickly from fond to depressed?" asked Sebastian.

"Oh," said Kurt not having realized his thoughts had been so easily displayed on his face. "I'm happy for him, but... I guess I'm a little jealous, too."

"Being unemployed and searching through your exes for a winner, or the least loser, wasn't your plan when you graduated from school?" asked Sebastian wryly.

Kurt snorted.

"Not exactly," Kurt replied with a short laugh.

The smile Sebastian had managed to get out of Kurt was short lived. Kurt couldn't help but recall the day when his big Broadway dreams received their first indication of disaster. He, his step-brother, and his best friend had gathered in the choir room at their high school to open their letters from the New York schools they had applied to. Rachel had gotten into NYADA and Finn had gotten into the NYU but Kurt had only needed to read the first few words; 'We regret to inform you...' to know that he wasn't as fortunate.

Blaine, _oh, sweet Blaine_, had pushed him to apply to NYADA along with Rachel even though Kurt had worried he wouldn't get in with his lack of extracurriculars. And just as Blaine had pushed him then, he had also been there to pick up his pieces when he had fallen instead of flown. After plenty of cheesecake and some fantastic, albeit slightly bloated sex, Blaine had revealed to Kurt that he had sent in a few applications to other schools in New York for Kurt. He had looked embarrassed about it and worried that Kurt might be mad, but he had explained that Tina had secretly applied to schools for Mike and it had given him the idea. He had wanted Kurt to have faith in himself which was why he didn't tell him about the back-ups in hopes that they weren't necessary.

Despite Blaine's faith in Kurt and his devotion, they had broken up only a few weeks later. Kurt had gone to NYU along with Finn in the fall; the school his ex-boyfriend had applied to for him.

"So," said Sebastian, obviously wanting to change the subject. "What are you going to wear?"

Kurt grinned brightly; Sebastian had said the magic words.

* * *

After spending an hour or more that evening going through his wardrobe and trying on different items for Sebastian to critique, Kurt finally decided on an outfit to wear when he went to D.C. to track down David Moore. At Sebastian's suggestion that he get a less '_flamboyant_' tie to wear because '_politicians don't wear McQueen neck ties, Kurt_', Kurt decided to go shopping for a new tie first thing the next morning.

He was just on his way home with a Dolce & Gabanna bag in his hand and guilt pulling at his chest for the rising balance on his credit card when his cell rang. He paused to pull his it from his coat pocket and answer the call.

"Kurt," came Rachel's voice when he said hello. "I'm on your street and I really need to use your bathroom."

"Let yourself in," said Kurt, biting his lip to keep from laughing. Rachel hated to go to the bathroom without the utmost privacy. "I'll be home in ten minutes."

He hurried his stride after hanging up, not wanting to keep Rachel waiting too long. When he arrived at the building, though, he decided to duck into Sebastian's apartment first, to show him the new tie. He knocked but no one answered, so he figured Sebastian was still asleep. Suddenly filled with glee at the possibility opportunity to prank the guy, he tried the door. It was unlocked!

Quietly, Kurt tiptoed into Sebastian's apartment. Everything was clean and in its place, unlike the previous times he had been there. He crept down the hall and slowly pushed open Sebastian's bedroom door. The bed was vacant and perfectly made. Kurt blinked at the sight before realizing he was standing in the doorway of Sebastian's room and suddenly feeling creepy.

He quickly left the apartment and crossed the hall to his own.

"Hello!" he called out as he opened his door, knowing Rachel was there.

He stopped abruptly when he saw Rachel perched uncomfortably on the edge of his couch with Sebastian sitting on the other side strumming a guitar and seemingly buck naked.

"Ugh," sighed out Kurt in frustration. "Tell me you're not naked on my couch sitting next to my best friend."

Sebastian grinned and lifted his guitar to reveal he was wearing briefs.

"Thankfully," said Rachel, primly. "He doesn't like to play without his underwear. He says it gets cold against his penis."

Sebastian nodded his head enthusiastically and Kurt had to cover a traitorous grin that threatened to cross his face. Rachel simply fidgeted on the couch looking entirely uncomfortable.

"Well," he almost laughed as he spoke. "I guess you two have met."

He set his things down on his counter and went into his kitchen to get a drink.

"Oh! Rachel!" he said a few moments later. "Remember David Moore?"

"Um..."

"Sebastian found him in D.C., so I'm going there tomorrow. And for the big meet, I bought this!" exclaimed Kurt, pulling the tissue paper wrapped tie from the bag. " I'm so excited!"

"Ooh, Dolce," said Sebastian in a low voice. "Excellent choice."

"Don't you have your interview tomorrow?" asked Rachel, not the least bit excited for Kurt. "And how much did that cost?"

"That's the beauty," explained Kurt. "I can wear my lovely outfit that Sebastian and I picked out last night and this gorgeous new tie and it'll be the bright part of a super-boring interview, and I'll be looking fantastic for an accidental, on-purpose encounter with my future husband."

"Hey," said Sebastian. "Where's your interview at? Did you ever think about getting into fashion?"

"No," cut in Rachel, shaking her head and still looking absolutely frigid in her posture. "He needs to pursue something within his grasp. While it isn't the glamorous life of a Broadway singer, he was doing quite well at bookkeeping before he lost his last job."

"Yeah," sigh Kurt, his shoulders falling just a little. "Fashion's just... a hobby."

"I know I tease," said Sebastian, strumming a few chords on his guitar absently. "But it seems like more than a hobby. You have all those issues of Vogue and you get so excited when you think of putting together a new outfit..."

"Excuse me," snapped Rachel, and Kurt turned sharply in surprise at her unusual tone to see her poking Sebastian roughly in the shoulder. "Would you _please_go on home so that Kurt and I can have a little privacy?"

Sebastian looked from her over to Kurt with a question in his eyes. Kurt was about to shrug in response when he remembered what Rachel had said on the phone. Suddenly, her demeanor made so much more sense.

"She has to poo," explained Kurt.

Rachel sputtered out a bunch of embarrassed sounds before dropping her head into her hands.

"No... I..." she stuttered before groaning.

"What _are _you doing here, anyway, Sebastian?" asked Kurt. "Hiding from another one-nighter?"

Aware of the other apartment's vacant state, Kurt awaited Sebastian's response with interest. He paused in movements after speaking, he had just been in Sebastian's house and it had been vacant and impeccably tidy.

"He must be a late sleeper," said Sebastian with a shrug and a nervous smile.

Kurt hummed in reply but narrowed his eyes slightly, wondering why Sebastian was pretending.

"Wait," started Rachel. "Are you... Is he... hiding out here because there's someone in his apartment?"

"It _appears_to be so," said Kurt at the same time as Sebastian grinned at Rachel and said, "He is."

"That's it," said Rachel, shaking her head and gathering her bags. "I'll just go to the coffee house down the block. I can't believe you two."

"Want to grab me a cannoli?" asked Sebastian with his trademark smirk as Rachel pushed past him.

Kurt bit the inside of his cheek when Rachel huffed at Sebastian.

"Oh, by the way, Kurt" said Rachel, pausing at Kurt's door. "Mercedes arrived yesterday. I thought you, Tina, and I could take her out for lunch tomorrow, but I guess you'll be _busy _chasing some..."

"Bye, Rachel," snapped Kurt.

She let out another indignant huff before twirling around, opening the door and exiting the apartment in one of her trademarked dramatic exits.

"She's nice," commented Sebastian airily.

Kurt snickered.

"So, he'll be doing research in the Adams Building for the rest of the day," said Sebastian's voice over the cell phone.

"How do you know that?" asked Kurt, walking briskly down the populated sidewalk after parking the little blue car Rachel had begrudgingly loaned him for the day.

"A magician never reveals his secrets," said Sebastian and Kurt narrowed his eyes, clearly hearing the smirk in his voice. "Unless... maybe they do if sex is involved?"

Kurt opened his mouth to respond when he noticed the unmistakable sound of his bathroom pipes groaning in the background. He furrowed his brow, coming to a stop in the crowded sidewalk and nearly getting crashed into by the pedestrians behind him.

"What was that sound?" asked Kurt as he waved his apologies at the people moving brusquely past him, their annoyance palpable.

"Uh, nothing," replied Sebastian's voice which was then followed by the squeaking of Kurt's '_antique_' bathtub faucet being shut off.

"Are you... are you taking a bath in _my_bathtub?" stammered Kurt in surprise.

"That's preposterous," said Sebastian. "Wow, I'm surprised to learn you're a Lionel Richie fan; did _not _see that one coming."

"I... _what_?" stammered Kurt before his eyes widened and he came to another abrupt stop.

Someone swore at him in a low voice and nearly knocked him over when they pushed past. Kurt considered flipping them off but decided it was below him. Instead, he poured as much ice into his next words to Sebastian.

"You know, looking at someone's playlist is like reading their diary."

Sebastian chuckled in response.

"Do you have a diary, Babe?" he asked a few beats later. "I could do with some light reading as I take my bath."

"You _are_in my bathtub," exclaimed Kurt in frustration which only grew when he imagined the self-satisfied smirk on Sebastian's face. "Well, just, don't touch my bath salts!"

With that, Kurt ended the call vehemently, which really wasn't that dramatic because it was a touch screen. He put his cell back into his bag and turned to head toward the building Sebastian had said. Just as he reached the front steps of the white stone John Adams Building, his phone pinged with a new message. He pulled it out and unlocked the screen to see new message from Sebastian. Brow furrowed, he opened it to find a picture Sebastian had taken of himself in Kurt's bathtub with Kurt's ipod in his hand and earbuds in his ears. Kurt let out a loud, bark of laughter which he was quick to cover with his hand. He typed out a response saying 'remind me to buy new earbuds' and hit send before replacing the phone in his bag and continuing into the library building.

.

* * *

**A/N:** You can find me on tumblr! My username is _idareu2bme_ and all my Number Twenty related posts are tagged _fic: Number Twenty_


	6. Chapter 6

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali, lurkdusoleil, perkytxgrl**  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex,_ Klaine Angst_

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did _take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story.

* * *

Chapter Six

* * *

David Moore was in the library just as Sebastian had said; and so were plenty of other men and women in suits, pant suits, and conservative pencil skirts. The decor was grand and traditional, with white statues and columns, and shelves and shelves of leather-bound books. In the middle of the room were large, dark wood tables where many people were seated. Though the room was very crowded, the silence was one of pin-drop proportions.

As he stepped into the room feeling completely out of his element, Kurt was glad Sebastian had helped him choose the proper outfit for the day. Politicians, Lawyers and Scholars –or whatever these people were— were definitely not the types of people Kurt normally socializedwith. Even his stint at Dalton Academy back in high school did nothing to prepare him for the pervasive lung-choking stuffiness that had nothing to do with the air-flow and everything to do with the people. But then, there was David, sitting across the room at a table with three different books open in front of him.

Kurt was debating on how to get David's attention when suddenly someone dropped a large book in one of the aisles of bookshelves and it echoed throughout the entire room. Everyone looked up in surprise, including David whose eyes immediately found Kurt's. They lit up with surprise and perhaps joy. Eyes trained on Kurt, David closed his books, picked them up, and rose to his feet. Kurt gave him a tentative smile as he approached.

"Kurt?" he whisper-exclaimed. "Wow, I can't believe you're here. I've been thinking about you all week."

Kurt was pleasantly shocked at the man's admission. His smile grew and he held out his hand for the man to shake, mindful of their environment. David grasped it, but didn't shake it, as if that would be too formal for them. Kurt's heart fluttered hopefully.

"Let me finish up here," he requested in a low voice. "And then meet me at the Belga Cafe at six. I'll call ahead and make sure they'll have room for us. Will that work out? Are you busy?"

"I can... I can move some things around on my schedule," offered Kurt, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning too widely. This was going so much better than he had thought.

"Wonderful! I'll see you at six," said David giving him a small smile and wink before breezing past back to the rows of bookshelves.

Kurt wanted to skip out of the room, but, of course that wouldn't be appropriate, so he raised his chin and slowly strode out instead, giving curt nods to whomever he made eye contact with. He wasn't sure what to do to pass the two hours he had to wait, but he soon found himself perched on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial and watching a few kids splash in the water of the Reflecting Pool. He pulled out his cell to call Sebastian.

"He remembered me," said Kurt the moment Sebastian answered the phone.

"That's a start," replied Sebastian through the tinny speaker.

"He was so happy to see me, Seb!" Kurt interrupted, excitedly launching into a full out ramble. "He said he had been thinking about me and then here I was! He's calling to make us reservations at a restaurant and he's meeting me there at six!"

Kurt paused.

"Damnit!" he suddenly hissed.

"What?" Sebastian asked.

"Should I just go wearing this suit? Or should I wear something else?" asked Kurt, suddenly feeling panicked. "Not that it matters because I was an idiot and didn't bring another change of clothes. Oh no, oh g*d, what should I do?"

"Kurt," deadpanned Sebastian and Kurt quieted. "It's a working day and it is only two hours away, I think you'll be fine wearing the same thing. Actually, it would be strange if you had the time to change, really."

"Yeah, yeah, you're right," said Kurt, nodding against the cell pressed to his ear. "You're right."

"Of course I'm right," said Sebastian.

They were both silent for a few moments, Kurt watching a few pigeons flying around in the sky. And Sebastian, well, who knew what Sebastian was doing?

"I'm really excited about this," Kurt finally said. "This might be it. My search might finally be over, and actually be successful."

Kurt let out a soft laugh of relief after saying the last bit.

"That's... great, Kurt," said Sebastian and he sounded a little sad - or perhaps distracted, like he had been in the middle of something when Kurt had called. Yeah, distracted made more sense because why would Sebastian be sad?

Another pause and then a soft sigh.

"Congrats," said Sebastian.

Kurt smiled again, "Than -"

Kurt paused when he suddenly heard the sound of a click ending the call from Sebastian's end. He pulled his cell away from his ear and looked at it in surprise for a moment before shrugging and putting it away. He stood up from the step he was sitting on, not wanting to get any more of a crease in his pants than he already had from the long drive there. He decided to walk around the Reflecting Pool while he waited. It was a nice day, after all.

* * *

Kurt found himself making his way through a cluster of tables that stood crowding the sidewalk and covered in charming yellow plaid tablecloths. He stepped through a simple wooden door and to his surprise and delight, the interior was stunning, even elegant. Kurt found David quite quickly and sat down across from him.

"I got you a nonfat Cafe Mocha," said David once Kurt was seated and curiously examining the mug in front of him. "I hope that's still your coffee order."

Kurt smiled brightly at him, pleased that he had remembered. He quickly picked up the mug and took a small sip to cover his excitement.

"I'm so glad we ran into each other today," reiterated David. "I've been thinking about you all week and wouldn't have known how to get in touch with you. But then, there you were..."

"There I was," repeated Kurt with a smile and a shrug.

"... In the middle of the John Adams Building of all places," chuckled David. "It has to be a sign."

Kurt bit his lip and nodded.

"Definitely a good sign," Kurt said.

David's eyes turned serious and passionate then, and Kurt held his breath as the man leaned in across the table.

"I have plans, Kurt," he said in a low but excited voice. "I have my eyes on a senate seat and then thepresidency."

Kurt's eyes widened at that. This wasn't really where he had hoped the conversation was going, but perhaps it would come around.

"Big things are happening, Kurt, and if the last few days are any indication, I think I could go all the way," said David, his eyes sparkling with excitement. Kurt nodded.

"So, this is what I need from you," continued David after a short pause to take a sip of his own drink. "We never dated."

Kurt's eyebrows drew together and his mouth dropped open at David's simply statement. Yes, they had dated. They had dated for an entire year. David had even asked Kurt to move in with him which Kurt had declined and ended their relationship over.

"We met when I was finishing University," said David and Kurt nodded in confusion because, yes, they had. "And you asked me out" –wait, no, David had asked him out. –"But I declined politely saying that I was flattered, but I'm straight."

Kurt felt lost and a little sick.

"You continued to pursue me," continued David as if reading from a script –a very, very false script. "But finally gave up when I kept declining. We became friends after that, but that is all."

David looked at him expectantly when he was finished speaking and Kurt just stared back, not really knowing what to say. David took a few sips of his drink while he patiently waited, calm and collected, while Kurt floundered, drowning in confusion and disappointment.

"I..." he finally managed and David smiled almost condescendingly at him.

"If anyone should question you about it in the future," he explained, "that's what happened."

Kurt stared blankly at him for a few more beats before it finally began to sink in. David hadn't wanted to seek him out because he missed him and wanted to get back together. He was trying to clean up all his 'indiscretions' before pursuing a career that would put him under scrutiny. He was stepping back into the closet!

Kurt closed his eyes and massaged at his temples. When he opened them again he gave David a resigned smile.

"Okay, David," he said. "If... if that's what you need to go after your dreams, then... yeah, that's what happened."

David beamed at him and Kurt smiled back weakly, remembering the days when that bright smile on David's handsome face was actually for him and not simply in relief.

"Thank you, Kurt," said David. "Change is happening. America has a black president, minorities are getting representation, our country is growing up... but," David let out a long breath of air. "But it isn't ready for a gay president."

"I hope... I hope someday you do become president, David," said Kurt with a sad smile. "You're a really amazing person."

"Thank you, Kurt," said David, his face softening and he discreetly caught Kurt's hand across the table and gave it a squeeze. "We have history, and... It is special to me, but..."

"No," said Kurt, cutting him off. "I get it, David. I really do. I just... I think I'm going to go. So, good luck. I really... I hope you change the world."

Kurt smiled one more fake smile before picking up his bag and quickly leaving the table. David was saying something, but he didn't look back. There were tears pricking at his eyes and he really didn't want anyone to see that. He hurried out to Rachel and Finn's car, pulling out his cell phone with shaking hands. He needed to hear Sebastian's voice.

* * *

It was nearly midnight by the time Kurt made it home to his apartment building. His limbs had stopped shaking and his tears had long dried, though fewer had fallen than he had expected. He didn't really feel sad, just numb and empty; and tired, so tired. His feet felt lead-filled as he slowly worked his way up the winding flights of stairs. Finally, he made it to his apartment door, nearly collapsing against it in relief. He put his key in the lock and turned it, but it was already unlocked, so he simply opened the door.

"Wait, wait, wait!" exclaimed Sebastian as Kurt walked into his dark apartment. "Don't move!"

Kurt's hand was already going for the light switch and his mind didn't comprehend in time to stop. The lights flicked on to reveal Sebastian setting wine glasses down on Kurt's dining table. Kurt let out a miserable sigh.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, watching numbly as Sebastian scurried around his apartment. "I'm not depressed enough to sleep with you."

"Close your eyes!"

"That won't help," murmured Kurt, but he obeyed.

"Aaaand," said Sebastian, the panic of surprise leaving his voice and another emotion taking its place... maybe nervous pride. "Open them."

Kurt opened his eyes just as Sebastian flicked on an unfamiliar hanging light over top of a desk that had never been in his apartment before. The light shone down on his white sewing machine that was set up on the old desk. Kurt's brow furrowed in confusion.

"Okay, yes, I admit I went through your stuff," said Sebastian at Kurt's silence. "It was a few weeks ago and I was looking for anything incriminating while waiting for you and... I saw this sitting on a pile of sketchbooks and fabric and partially sewn clothes."

Kurt turned his eyes away from the sewing machine to stare wordlessly at him.

"So, I had this desk I wasn't using and I know it isn't really the same style as the rest of your apartment, but you could refinish it... if, you.. uh... if you wanted to use it..." Sebastian was rambling nervously which was bewildering Kurt even further.

"I can put this all away if you hate it," said Sebastian with a sigh.

"No, that... no," said Kurt, suddenly drawn from his moment of confusion. Everything seemed to be confusing him that day. He needed to save Sebastian from his nervous flounderings, though. Adorable as they were, they were also really disconcerting considering... well... Sebastian.

"That's... this is... really great," murmured Kurt with a small smile.

Sebastian looked up at him from where he had been nervously straightening the pile of Kurt's old sketchbooks on the desk.

"Yeah?"

The hopeful look on his face made Kurt's stomach swoop; a sensation he hadn't felt in a long time, at least not the pleasant version.

"Well, there wasn't an outlet nearby, so I ran a cord back behind your shelves," said Sebastian, obviously heartened by Kurt's words. "I think it is pretty discreet, though."

"You would have had to move all my furniture to do that," stated Kurt.

"I had to anyway," said Sebastian with a shrug. "I was trying to find the best spot for this desk. I don't know if the same is true for sewing, but they tell artists to only paint in natural light. So, this is the best spot; kind of out of the way, but sitting where the sunlight can reach it."

"Sebastian," breathed Kurt, shaking his head. "I... I don't know what to say. Why did you do all this?"

Sebastian gave him a shy shrug, looking down at his hands before looking back up at Kurt.

"You seemed really down on the phone... so..." Sebastian stopped mid thought and then took a deep breath as if steeling himself. "Kurt, you shouldn't be just trying for simply 'what you can get'."

Kurt tensed at that, but Sebastian continued.

"Bookkeeping is boring," said Sebastian and Kurt relaxed a little. "No one likes office jobs, no one. If they say otherwise, they're lying, or too pathetic to see how miserable they are."

Kurt bit his lip.

"I don't know what happened to shake your confidence. I mean, I haven't really known you very long... but, Kurt, I do know that you are so much better than a cubicle."

Kurt just stared at him, stunned.

"I don't know," sighed Sebastian, running a hand through his hair. "I just thought maybe you could sew your own clothes, design a line or something. Maybe open an online store. I know a guy who makes excellent websites... Or, maybe... maybe that's stupid. Maybe you don't want that. You could, um; you could be a fashion journalist or something. Go to the runway shows and criticise the new lines or whatever... you like to criticize people's clothes."

Sebastian grinned fondly as he said that; Kurt managed to smile back.

"I just... Kurt, you're better than... all this," said Sebastian, and Kurt knew he was talking about more than applying for lame jobs. It only made sense that he was meaning that Kurt was better than his hapless quest to get one of his exes to take him back. Somehow, it felt a lot less judgmental than anyone else's similar comments on the matter. "I don't want to see you waste your... potential. You could be something really great. I can tell just by looking at you."

Kurt's bottom lip was trembling. He bit it to keep it in check. Sebastian was looking at him with the most earnest expression he had ever seen and Kurt didn't know what the strange tensing in his chest meant, but it was strange and new and uncomfortable.

"So... um... I'm guessing you didn't eat dinner with Mr. Jumping-Back-In-The-Closet," said Sebastian, looking flustered but trying to conceal it with his usual cocky facade. "Hungry?"

"Yes," sighed out Kurt, finally releasing his death grip on his bag and letting it drop to the floor. "So, so much."

"Good, cuz I made supper," said Sebastian with a wink, and, good, that felt more familiar.

"You did not make supper," argued Kurt as Sebastian led him to the dining table.

"Okay," admitted Sebastian, not in the least put out by Kurt's comment. "So, I ordered food and then put it on your dinnerware so it looks fancy."

Kurt laughed.

He sat down at the table and Sebastian poured him some wine before going back to the kitchen to bring out their dinner. He set the plates down on the table with a flourish before sitting down across from him.

"Bon appétit" said Sebastian with a smirk and a cheesy French accent.

"Will you ever let me live that down?"groaned out Kurt from behind a grin.

"What's the fun in that?" asked Sebastian before picking up a fork to dig into the food.

They ate together companionably. Kurt making a show of complementing Sebastian on his cooking skills while Sebastian smiled and playfully rolled his eyes. When they finished, Sebastian took the plates to the kitchen and returned with the wine bottle to top off their drinks. They toasted to having dinner after midnight before Kurt let out a sigh and set down his wine glass.

"It wouldn't have worked out anyway," he said. "How could I possibly date a politician? He's in D.C. all the time and I'm really not politically correct enough to be under that kind of scrutiny."

"Politically correct is boring," said Sebastian with a shrug. "I don't like boring people. Besides, no politicians are truly politically correct; they all have scandals going under their veneer."

"And I guess I'm one of them," laughed Kurt humourlessly. "And I still don't have a date for the wedding."

Sebastian frowned.

"Let's go get some air."

* * *

Just as it had been described many times before, New York really was the city that never slept. Kurt had no idea where Sebastian was taking him when they stepped out of the apartment at 2 a.m., but it didn't take long for them to find a taxi and head there. Kurt felt lost when Sebastian asked to head down Shore Parkway and even more confused when they stopped next to a row of over-the-top condos that looked more suited to the beaches of Miami than the shorefront of New York. Sebastian paid the driver while Kurt looked around, squinting in glare of street lights and lit buildings while simultaneously enjoying the fresh salty air the ocean's proximity afforded them.

"We played a gig here last week," explained Sebastian after joining Kurt on the wide sidewalk. "It was a big birthday party for this idiot bachelor. Anyway, I forgot to return the key."

Kurt's eyes widened when Sebastian pulled a key from his pocket with an evil grin.

"We're going to break into someone's house?" asked Kurt, scandalized.

"Pfft, no," said Sebastian giving Kurt a look. "I just told you, I have a key."

Sebastian crossed the quiet street, maybe this part of New York actually did sleep, and Kurt quickly jogged after him.

"What if someone wakes up?" asked Kurt, still completely shocked. "Why are we even...?"

"No one's home," said Sebastian. "Calm down, Babe. Live a little."

Kurt followed him up the wide steps at the front of the condo and hugged his arms around himself, glancing nervously around as he waited for Sebastian to unlock the door.

"How do you know no one's home?" hissed Kurt as Sebastian opened the door.

"Because right after his birthday party, he was set to head down to Jamaica for more partying," replied Sebastian before stepping into the home and quickly disarming the alarm system by typing a code into the keypad. He turned back to Kurt then and gave him a bright smile. "You have been entirely too unhappy the last few weeks. It is time for you to have some fun. So, stop worrying so damn much and just play along."

Sebastian held out a hand to him.

"I... okay," said Kurt, managing a smile as he slowly reached for Sebastian's offered hand.

The moment Sebastian's fingers had closed around Kurt's, he pulled him forward, nearly off his feet, and led him through the open-concept home. Kurt's breath caught in his throat in awed surprise when they came to the other side of the large kitchen to see that beyond the wall of glass was a large indoor pool.

Sebastian let go of his hand to open the glass door leading into the large, dark room. Tropical heat hit them as they stepped through and Sebastian quickly jogged ahead of him to grab a remote from the patio furniture in the corner of the room. He used it to turn on the lights, adjusting them to a soft glow before switching on music that began to play melodiously over the overhead speakers. Kurt slowly followed after him, star struck. The floor was warm under his feet, a sandy finish that was slightly pebbled to reduce slip. The pool was blue and sparkling under the lights. The room was huge and even had a second floor that was half open to the pool below with what looked like a DJ station.

"Fancy a swim?" asked Sebastian before nonchalantly pulling his shirt up over his head and throwing it to the side.

Kurt's eyes widened and he stammered a few incoherent sounds before swallowing and clearing his throat.

"I... umm... don't have a suit," he said, lamely.

"Neither do I," Sebastian said smoothly with a sly grin.

Kurt paled as he saw Sebastian move his hands to his fly. Sebastian paused when he caught sight of Kurt's expression. He rolled his eyes and let his hands fall away from his jeans.

"Okay, Babe," he said. "If you wanna be a prude about it, how about we skinny dip in our underwear? It kind of ruins the whole skinny part, being as it is pretty much the same as swim trunks, but..."

"Briefs are slightly more form-fitting than swim trunks," Kurt said haughtily, trying to mask his nerves. "Well, unless you wear form fitting swimwear."

"You're trying to imagine what I wear, now," stated Sebastian, looking entirely too smug.

"No," squeaked Kurt, his eyes following the lines of Sebastian's naked torso as the tall, lean man slunk back across the room to him.

"Actually," said Sebastian with a shrug and sudden matter-of-fact expression. "A thong; full out banana hammock."

"Really?" asked Kurt, unbelieving.

Sebastian tilted his head to the side and bit his lip as a slow, devilish grin spread across his ever-changing face. He considered Kurt for a moment before shaking his head and laughing.

"No, but I got you picturing it."

"You got me almost vomiting in my mouth, is what you did," huffedKurt, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Whatever you say," replied Sebastian, flippantly. "So, is it a deal?"

Kurt worried his bottom lip between his teeth as he eyed the large staircase that rose from the opposite side of the pool and wound up over it to a second floor above them.

"Here's the deal," said Kurt. "You dive in from the staircase and I'll swim with you."

Sebastian turned to look at the staircase towering over the pool, and then turned back to Kurt with twinkling eyes.

"Deal."

Kurt's jaw fell open as he watched Sebastian casually slide his jeans down his muscular thighs and stride with confidence across the room to the stairs. The sight of his perfectly shaped ass as he made his way up the steps left Kurt almost speechless, but the fact that he was about to see his friend jump from a ridiculous height, was still a little more pressing.

"Wait! No!," exclaimed Kurt, chasing after Sebastian. "Oh my g*d, Sebastian, that is way too high, you will break your neck! You'll die and, even worse, I'll have to call it in and explain why we were even in here!"

"Sorry, Babe," said Sebastian with a shrug. "You made the deal. You can't go back on it, now."

Kurt watched in horror as Sebastian made his way ever higher up the long, curving staircase to a spot directly above the pool, and much, much too high to jump from. Sebastian made a big show of climbing onto the railing and putting his hands together over his head like he was going to dive.

"No," exclaimed Kurt, suddenly pulling at his tie and undoing it enough to pull up over his head. "No, don't! No! Okay, I'll swim with you! I'll even go completely skinny!"

Sebastian paused and slowly brought down his arms. His eyes were on Kurt, waiting expectantly. Kurt took in a deep breath and quickly removed his suit jacket, stepping back to drape it over the the closest patio chair.

"Whew, good," called out Sebastian. "I really didn't want to have to jump from here; I think I might actually have died from this height."

Continuing to undress, Kurt began undoing the buttons of the dress shirt beneath. Even from so far below, he easily heard Sebastian's indignant huff when he began folding his shirt. He narrowed his eyes as he placed his folded shirt on the seat of the chair, Sebastian's possible death was no excuse to mistreat McQueen. He undid his slacks and stepped out of them next, deciding to drape them over the back of the chair instead of take the time to fold them since Sebastian was suddenly so impatient.

When Kurt was standing in nothing but his dark grey briefs, he looked up at Sebastian.

"Okay," he shouted. "Come down, now."

"You promised me skinny dipping," replied Sebastian, shaking his head, still perched on the hand railing like a bird on a wire.

Even from the distance, Kurt could see Sebastian's leg muscles trembling as he struggled to keep his balance. Kurt sighed and hooked his thumbs in his briefs. The moment he looked away to pull them down, though, he heard a garbled 'OH FUCK' and glanced up just in time to see a blur of Sebastian hit the water.

"Sebastian!" screamed Kurt, nearly tripping out of his briefs in his haste to reach the water.

He dove in and swam to where Sebastian had disappeared. As he cut through the water, kicking hard and moving his arms in a frenzy to get to the other man, Sebastian came up for air, choking and spitting out mouthfuls of water.

"Sebastian," panted Kurt, reaching for him in the water. "Oh my g*d, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," groaned Sebastian between gulps of air and watery coughs as they both treaded water. "Just give me a moment to die."

They swam back to the side of the pool together, Kurt swimming awkwardly while clinging to Sebastian to reassure the still-spluttering man - or possibly himself- that everything would be okay. When they reached the side, Sebastian leaned his back against the wall and exhaled a long breath in relief. Kurt stood in front of him, his toes nearly meeting Sebastian's. He carefully placed a hand on the pool wall on either side of Sebastian, eyes scanning his face, looking for clues as to his physical state.

"Seb," he questioned, voice choked with worry.

Kurt waited as Sebastian looked back at him wearily, eyes drifting absentmindedly downwards.

"You're naked," was all Sebastian managed to say in response.

Kurt blushed brightly and the corners of his mouth flickered in the beginnings of a smile.

"I am," he agreed, looking down bashfully.

He suddenly realized that looking down was perhaps unwise. The delectable peach of Sebastian's skin looked unbearably touchable through the nearly transparent material of his wet briefs as he caught peeks at it through the ripples in the water. The mere sight made Kurt feel light-headed, everything so much more electric at their sheer proximity and the intimacy of sharing water. When he looked up, it was to catch Sebastian doing the same to him, his handsome face flushed and green eyes darkened. Kurt cleared his throat and unconsciously licked his lips.

"And all I had to do was almost die," Sebastian mused wryly as if unaffected, though his voice came out rougher than Kurt had heard before. "I shoulda done that a long time ago."

Mood momentarily broken, Kurt let out a little snort and slapped at Sebastian's shoulder.

"Jackass."

"Hey!" cried out Sebastian, throwing up his hands to fend off Kurt's light-hearted assault. "I almost died and now you're abusing me!"

"You said you were fine," replied Kurt with a lift of his eyebrow.

"You can't always believe victims of traumatic experiences," replied Sebastian. "Their emotions usually cloud the truth."

With a half shoulder shrug, Kurt turned and began to swim away. He grinned to himself, feeling his panic fall away at the warm laughter of Sebastian behind him, leaving a steady thrum of nervous energy in its wake.

He swam a few laps around the pool, waiting for... well, he wasn't sure what he was waiting for, but as he swam, he could feel Sebastian's eyes on him. They were a constant heated presence and, despite the new and alarming emotions playing through his mind, it wasn't nearly as jarring as he would have thought.

Eventually, Sebastian came after him, with a speed and grace only seen in professional swimmers. Kurt let out a yelp of surprise when Sebastian grabbed hold of his ankles. He giggled as he kicked him away and swam with heightened speed to the far curve of the pool. After a laughter-filled game of cat and mouse, Kurt finally allowed Sebastian to corner him in the smaller end of the asymmetrically shaped pool. Sebastian grinned triumphantly when he had him backed up against the wall.

"You can't escape me, Babe," said Sebastian, all flirtatious and silly, as he moved into Kurt's personal space.

Kurt rolled his eyes and smirked back at him, though his heart rate was picking up exponentially with Sebastian, drenched and panting, moving purposefully toward him. Kurt swallowed almost audibly as his eyes were drawn to the small streams of water dripping down Sebastian's toned torso in the most dangerously pornographic of imageries. Sebastian's playful smile turned into something much more serious as they drew close.

"Don't call me Babe," whispered Kurt hoarsely, looking up into Sebastian's eyes.

"Okay," whispered Sebastian, eyes dark and lips growing ever closer.

Kurt's breath caught in his throat and his hands came up of their own accord to rest tentatively on Sebastian's shoulders. His eyes fluttered shut in anticipation of what was to come. But no kiss came. A bit surprised, even bereft if he were honest with himself, Kurt slowly opened his eyes to find Sebastian with his eyes clenched shut and his bottom lip held tightly between his teeth. Sebastian looked so torn and small in that moment that Kurt's heart twisted in his chest.

"Hey?" rasped Kurt, reaching up to gently brush his thumb over Sebastian's bottom lip, freeing it from his teeth. "What's going on?"

"I'm..." Sebastian let out a soft sigh, swallowed, and opened his eyes. "I'm taking advantage."

Kurt's eyes widened.

"What?"

"Nothing," groaned Sebastian, letting go of Kurt's hips, and fuck, Sebastian's hands had been on Kurt's bare hips. "I'm... I'm sorry, Kurt. Did you just want to go?"

Kurt blinked at Sebastian's crumpled face a few times before slowly nodding.

"Yeah, okay," replied Kurt, quietly.

Sebastian backed away and climbed out of the pool. His baby blue briefs clung to him as he slowly walked to his pile of clothes. Mesmerized, Kurt studied the movement of the muscles under his soft skin while attempting to get control of his spiraling libido. The two things were counteracting each other, though, so Kurt reluctantly closed his eyes and turned away when Sebastian started to pull down his wet briefs. When Kurt dared look again, Sebastian was in his jeans and retrieving his shirt.

Kurt took a deep breath and pulled himself out of the swimming pool. He tried to maintain some semblance of dignity as he squelched dripping wet and completely nude across the pool deck to his own clothes. He felt vulnerable and exposed but brightened a little when he caught Sebastian's eye and the other man let out a soft gasp and a murmured 'fuck, so gorgeous' in a way that made it obvious to Kurt that he hadn't meant to say it outloud.

Kurt still felt absolutely ridiculous as he tried to tug on his clothes while still damp, even after Sebastian had given him his shirt to use as a towel, insisting that he didn't want him to ruin his expensive suit with chlorine spots.

"You want to go for a walk? Talk?" asked Sebastian, softly, once Kurt had finished getting dressed.

"Okay," breathed Kurt, heart in his throat.

* * *

**A/N:** You can find me on tumblr! My username is _idareu2bme_ and all my Number Twenty related posts are tagged _fic: Number Twenty_


	7. Chapter 7

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali, lurkdusoleil, perkytxgrl**  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex,_ Klaine Angst_

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did _take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story.

* * *

**_Chapter Seven_**

* * *

Kurt could hear the stuttered breathing of Sebastian as the other man shivered next to him; chilled, even with Kurt's suit jacket draped over his shoulders. Feeling the chill himself, he huddled closer to him as they walked; trying to share what little body heat they had between the two of them. It had been a bit awkward at first, Kurt silent and trying not to feel like an idiot for letting his guard down only to be rejected at something as trivial as a mere kiss. Sebastian was quiet and contemplative, Kurt imagined the man was berating himself for same moment. Eventually, though, they picked up earlier conversations.

"So, what do you do that you're home all the time?" asked Kurt, teasingly, though he still felt awkward.

"I'm not home_ all_ the time," argued Sebastian with the beginnings of an almost-smile.

Kurt gave him a look. Sebastian rolled his eyes in response, bumping his hip against Kurt.

"What I do isn't important," said Sebastian with a shrug. "It's only part-time and definitely only temporary."

"Okay," said Kurt. "So what do you _want_ to do?"

"I want to write my own music," replied Sebastian, and then a small smile crossed his face as he continued. "I want to write other people's music, too."

Kurt's heart stuttered at that. The way Sebastian spoke reminded him of how he had sounded when he was passionate and excited about coming to New York, about attending NYADA, about taking Broadway by storm. It hadn't worked out and then reality had kicked him in the ass, repetitively. He glanced sideways at Sebastian.

"Don't you worry about paying rent?" he asked, not knowing a better way of wording it. "I don't love bookkeeping, or marketing, or secretary work, but..."

"What_ do_ you love?" interrupted Sebastian.

Kurt had to seriously think about that before he answered. His first reflex was, as always, to say performing, bitter though the thought was. But, that was the Kurt from high school, the boy with dreams and a boyfriend, who lived in Ohio, who didn't have the experiences he currently had. He wasn't that boy anymore. So, what did today's Kurt love? What was _he_ excited about?

"I want my own line," said Kurt, finally, grinning as if admitting it brought a weight off of his shoulders he hadn't realized he was stooping under. "I want to be a designer."

"Great!"

"No one will wear me," said Kurt with a sad sigh, letting his shoulders slump back down. "And I'm too old to just be getting started in something new. Besides, _you_ said I dress like a woman."

"Teasing," said Sebastian with a dismissive wave of the hand. "You said I dressed like a fraternity boy."

Kurt gave him a solemn look.

"Oh," laughed Sebastian. "Well, _I_ was teasing."

Kurt laughed and shook his head. When they had finished their moment of shivering laughter, Sebastian caught Kurt's arm and pulled him around to face him.

"Kurt," he said with sincerity. "You're not dead, yet."

Breath catching in his throat, Kurt swallowed nervously and nodded.

"Okay," Kurt choked out barely above a whisper.

Sebastian smiled fondly at him making Kurt's stomach flutter.

"Let's go home," said Sebastian. "I'm freezing."

* * *

Kurt unlocked the door with cold, fumbling fingers. The apartment was dark when he swung open the door and stepped inside, save for the lamp hanging over his sewing machine that had been left on. Wine glasses still stood silently waiting on the table, dishes from their night-time meal were piled haphazardly on the counter, Kurt's bag sat against the counter; everything was just as they had left it, but suddenly everything seemed so much different.

Sebastian stayed leaning in the doorway as Kurt crossed the room. Anxious to rid himself of his damp clothes, Kurt unbuttoned his dress shirt as he walked. He looked back over his shoulder at Sebastian, wondering why he wasn't coming further into the apartment. It dawned on Kurt then, that Sebastian was, uncharacteristically, waiting for an invitation. Kurt paused and slowly turned around to regard him. He was met with eyes that revealed a nervous longing -something he could easily detect because he was feeling it too.

He opened his mouth to ask him in, but couldn't seem to make anything come out; the heaviness of the moment seemed to render him soundless. Something between them was shifting. He closed his mouth, swallowed, looked down at his fingers still deftly working on the tiny buttons of his shirt, took a deep breath, and then, finally, looked up at Sebastian once more.

"You better give me my suit jacket back," he said, inwardly cursing himself even as he said it. "It's really expensive."

"Alright," said Sebastian, taking a step into the apartment and moving to take the article in question off. "Give me my shirt and I'll go."

Kurt looked down at the shirt in question that had been hanging in the crook of his elbow while his hands were busy. He bit his lip and looked back up at Sebastian.

"Maybe you should stay," he breathed, the weight of the statement keeping his voice small.

Sebastian's eyes widened for a millisecond, but he kept his face schooled.

"Oh?" he asked.

Kurt nodded, clearing his throat.

"Well, you might have a concussion from your fall earlier," he explained, coyly. "You shouldn't be alone if that's the case."

"I didn't hit my head when I fell," argued Sebastian, eyes narrowed but corner of his mouth turning up –an obvious indicator that he was going to play along. "It was more of an undignified belly flop, anyway."

Kurt hummed, nodding. "It looked painful."

"Even if I _had _hit my head," Sebastian continued to argue even while shutting the door behind him and moving further into the apartment. "We walked around in the freezing cold for almost an hour after; I'm probably good to go."

"Hypothermia, then," insisted Kurt. "We need to rewarm you before you start paradoxical undressing."

Sebastian hummed lowly as he slunk across the room with Kurt in his sights.

"Maybe we should just give in and skip to that part," he said in a deep voice that sent tremors through to each of Kurt's nerve endings.

"What?" asked Kurt distractedly as Sebastian moved into his space, his eyelids falling half-shut and a warmth growing in his belly.

"The paradoxical undressing," explained Sebastian.

He slowly raised his hand to caress the side of Kurt's face and Kurt leaned into the touch, his head suddenly feeling much lighter than it had seconds earlier. He let out a stuttering sigh, eyelids fluttering shut of their own accord before he even properly realized Sebastian was leaning in to kiss him.

And then Sebastian's lips were on his. Kurt knew Sebastian was not unsure of his physicality by any means, but the kiss was tentative; slow and searching. As Kurt responded, though, the heat of it quickly grew. Kurt inhaled sharply, arms quickly raising to wrap around Sebastian's shoulders, fingers of one hand threading through his damp hair with those of his other clutching tightly to the fabric of his own suit jacket.

Kurt could feel warmth blossoming in his belly at the familiar yet new sensation of kissing Sebastian. He doubled his efforts when he felt Sebastian move his hands so that both were cupping his face and the other man tilted his head and pressed in for more. The kiss quickly moved from gentle and sweet to something a little wild and so deliciously passionate with tongue and suction, and a touch of teeth. It didn't really lose the gentleness through its transition, though –not really. Sebastian was kissing him like he was –not exactly fragile, but... precious. There was a tenderness in the way Sebastian touched him, the way his large hands gently cradled Kurt's face, in the way their mouths slotted together and bodies pressed close, that Kurt hadn't experienced in a decade. It nearly brought tears to his eyes.

Pushing the emotion aside, Kurt concentrated on the physicality of it –something less uncomfortable, something he had come to understand so much more easily. Kissing, touching, foreplay... it was like a dance. It was a tango he knew all the steps to, a performance he could feel confident in, even as his heart ached with want for the emotion emanating from Sebastian that he still couldn't let himself completely open to.

When they pulled back and their eyes found each other, they remained motionless for a few strained seconds before something in both of them simultaneously snapped and suddenly they were frantically grabbing for each other. Kurt pushed his jacket off Sebastian's shoulders, while Sebastian's fingers quickly opened the fly of his dress slacks. Their mouths crashed together as they worked, breathing hotly into each other as electricity crackled between them.

Face still fused to Sebastian's, Kurt hooked his fingers into the front of the man's jeans and pulled him with him as he backed into his bedroom. They fell back onto Kurt's bed, breathless, hands roaming and clutching at the exposed skin of their heaving chests. Kurt pulled Sebastian completely on top of him, wanting to feel his weight over him, pushing him into the mattress. Sebastian sat up on his knees, straddling Kurt as he ran his hands over Kurt's torso, starting at the waistband of his briefs and moving gradually up to his shoulders. Kurt's entire body shuddered. A low moan built up in the back of his throat and escaped when Sebastian leaned down to fully drape his body over Kurt's while fitting their mouths together for a deliciously sensual kiss. Their hands found each other at their sides, fingers intertwining, and Sebastian moved Kurt's hands up above his head. Kurt groaned, feeling owned and wanted, as Sebastian pressed his tongue possessively into his mouth, licking into the taste of him, before pulling it back to suck on his bottom lip.

Kurt was panting heavily when Sebastian pulled back to start kissing over his jaw, behind his ear and then down the side of his neck. Kurt felt his body tensing and relaxing every millisecond as he toes curled and his dick grew harder in his briefs. He groaned, letting Sebastian kiss down his body. He was not able to do anything _but_ let him as his hands were still captive above his head. His hips bucked up of their own accord when Sebastian sucked one of his nipples into his mouth, sending a new wave of heat through his belly and groin.

Kurt considered ripping his hands free and rolling Sebastian over so they could hurry and fuck already, when he realized with a jarring clarity that they shouldn't be doing this. Frustrated, he let out a long groan that hitched in the middle when Sebastian's hand ghosted over his groin.

"Sebastian," cut out Kurt, eyes squeezed shut and jaw clenching. "I have to slow down."

"Mmmm, what?" was Sebastian's answer, the sound of it vibrated into Kurt's skin where Sebastian had being mouthing at his ribs.

"We need to stop," said Kurt, more determined than frustrated this time.

Sebastian pulled back, letting go of Kurt's hands and rolling onto his side. He laid next to Kurt for a few moments catching his breath looking so gorgeous and absolutely debauched that Kurt hated himself for making them stop. Still, he knew he'd be worse off in the morning if they had continued.

"I'm sorry," whispered Kurt, barely audible over their combined panting.

He watched as Sebastian closed his eyes for a few moments as if trying to get control of himself. Finally Sebastian opened his eyes again and smiled at Kurt, though it looked somewhat pained.

"No, it's... it's okay," said Sebastian. "I understand."

Kurt bit his lip and he could see how Sebastian's eyes were immediately drawn to the movement.

"I'm going to keep kissing you, though," whispered Sebastian as he moved in.

A small smile tugged at Kurt's mouth and he nodded when Sebastian paused inches from his face to wait for his consent. Considering their previous frenzy, the soft, chaste kiss Sebastian pressed to his lips was almost comical... except that it really, really wasn't. Kurt's heart fluttered in his chest at the sweetness of it.

"Will you be my date to the wedding?" he asked breathlessly when the other man pulled back to look down at him.

The slow, warm smile that spread across Sebastian's face made Kurt's heart clench in his chest. Sebastian leaned in to kiss him twice more before pulling back and propping himself up on his elbow.

"I would be honored," he said, his voice still low and a little rough, but tender and altogether lovely.

Kurt smiled nervously up at him before grabbing him behind his head and pulling him down for more kissing. They cuddled close on the bed, the giddiness and enthusiasm of their kisses gradually tapering to sweet comfort and bliss. Eventually, they fell asleep burrowed together into Kurt's blankets.

* * *

A few hours later, Kurt woke with the bright midmorning sun beaming into the room. Still feeling tired, Kurt considered going back to sleep before he realized he wasn't alone in his bed. He breathed in sharply at the revelation, his eyes quickly popping open, but as he took in Sebastian's sleeping face, everything came back to him. He couldn't help but smile softly as he remembered everything Sebastian had done for him the night before.

Sebastian began to stir and for one panicked second, Kurt realized that he hadn't slunk off to fix his hair and face like he usually did when he awoke with someone in his bed. He suppressed his panic, though, as Sebastian's eyelids parted to reveal the bright green irises of eyes trained on him. He bit his lip, smiling nervously, as he waited for Sebastian to say something.

Sebastian reached for him and softly ran the back of his fingers over the side of Kurt's face. Kurt's eyes fell shut and he breathed in a shuddery breath. When the warmth of Sebastian's hand disappeared, he opened his eyes again to search Sebastian's face.

Sebastian let out a soft sigh and smiled fondly at him.

"G*d you look gorgeous in the morning," he whispered before leaning in to softly kiss Kurt's lips.

"Really?" breathed Kurt when Sebastian had pulled back.

"Yeah."

Sebastian rolled onto his back then, rubbing his eyes and muffling a yawn. Kurt watched in awe of this man who laid beside him, who he thought he had figured out, but who had completely surprised him over the last twelve hours.

"How about," said Sebastian, turning back to Kurt. "We both go get showered and dressed and meet back here in an hour, and I'll take you out for a late breakfast. There's this really great little place a few blocks over that makes Swedish crepes. Then, we can come back here and you can show me all your old designs and we can go through your fabrics and those half-sewn pieces you had piled on top of your sewing machine in your closet. I want to see what designs the up-and-coming Kurt Hummel has underway."

Kurt's breath caught in his throat and he just stared at Sebastian, shocked and delighted and wondering if he was perhaps dreaming. When Sebastian raised his eyebrows at him like he was waiting for a response, Kurt shook himself and let out a small embarrassed laugh.

"I...yeah, sorry," stuttered Kurt. "Yeah, that would be... Sebastian, that would be perfect."

His face hurt from smiling and he was sure he looked like an idiot, but then Sebastian moved closer to him to kiss him a few more times as if relishing in his ability to do so. Kurt's heart fluttered in his chest and he thought about pushing Sebastian back down into the bedding and kissing him until they were both out of breath and hard. It was that moment when his cell phone started to beep with an alarm on the bedside table.

Kurt groaned in frustration, but reached out to blindly grab for the phone as Sebastian sat up to give him some room. He looked at his phone and realized he was supposed to meet Rachel and the girls in half an hour.

"Oh shit," hissed Kurt, sitting upright. "I have to go! Damnit! Rachel's already irritated with me about my whole 'quest' thing when I should be helping her with her wedding and now... _shit_... now I'm going to be so insanely late. I'm sorry I gotta go!"

Kurt nearly fell out of bed in his haste. He continued muttering nonsensical things about being late, Rachel and Broadway divas, and how she feels about punctuality while he quickly moved about his room grabbing what he needed before scurrying off to his bathroom to shower. When he entered his bathroom, he dropped his clothes and towel to the floor and spun around to run back out to Sebastian who was still sprawled on his bed wearing a bemused expression that held a hint of disappointment. Kurt went to him, grasped his face in both hands, and kissed him hard. When he pulled back from the kiss, Sebastian was grinning at him in his old cocky manner and Kurt couldn't help but lean in for one more kiss before running back to the bathroom.

* * *

It was Friday and the wedding was to take place the next Saturday –eight days away, yet Kurt found himself in a local flower shop helping Rachel choose her flowers. Had it been his wedding, he would probably be panicking over this fact. Actually, no –if it were _his_ wedding, this would never, ever, ever happen because Kurt would be _so_ much more prepared.

Kurt rolled his eyes; Rachel talked like her wedding was the biggest event of the millennium, and yet, she was humming and hawing over flower arrangements like she had absolutely no plan. It was eight days away from the big day and she had absolutely no plan. Kurt had wondered why Rachel had wanted to spend two hours at the florists before meeting with the other girls, but it all made sense now.

"I like the pink and white lilies," she said, turning to Kurt for approval.

"The Stargazer lilies," said Kurt, trying to keep himself from sounding condescending or annoyed, but really, she should have had this all sorted by now and he should be eating crepes with his gorgeous and surprisingly, amazingly sweet neighbour."They _are_ lovely but your entire theme is purple. Do you really want to have the main colour of your bouquets be pink when you have purple dresses? I mean, we can make it work but..."

Rachel sighed.

"I don't know, Kurt," she said. "What do you think I should go with?"

Kurt hummed under his breath for a few moments as he looked around the store.

"Well," he said. "If we got some burgundy clematis and some white and purple hellebore, maybe some dark pink peonies, and some... oooh, I don't even know what kind of flower this is but it is almost exactly the same purple as the bridesmaid dresses. We put all these together, get some dark green foliage and some white astilbes or something, and you can have your pink and purple theme."

Rachel eyed the flowers Kurt had pulled from the different bunches critically before shaking her head.

"No," she said. "As much as I love pink, I don't think we need it."

Kurt grinned in relief.

"Excellent," he said. "Then I can tell you my idea! Most people would want to go with whites and creams to counteract the bold of purple, which, of course, is lovely. I was thinking you could go a little more unexpected, though."

"I'm listening," said Rachel, enthusiasm growing on her face.

"Orange," said Kurt, excitedly.

"Orange?" repeated Rachel in disbelief. "Kurt, are you sure?"

"Yes," said Kurt, nodding. "We could even use lilies, then. You like the Stargazer lilies, we'll get Tiger lilies. Oh! And dark purple orchids with green chrysanthemums! Not only would the colours be dynamic, but the shapes of the flowers would be _amazing_ together!"

Rachel fiddled with the petals of the daisies in the decorative bucket closest to them.

"We could use orange carnations, if you'd rather," offered Kurt when Rachel didn't look convinced. "Some fuchsia anemones or even sweet peas to soften the colour contrast..."

"Rachel! Kurt!" exclaimed Tina, drawing both of their attentions away from the buckets of cut flowers they were looking over.

Tina and Mercedes briskly made their way through the store with Diana at their heels. Mercedes was quick to pull Kurt into a nearly bone crushing hug.

"Hey, Boo," she said to him with a bright smile before kissing his cheek. "I have missed you so much."

"It is _so_ good to see you, 'Cedes," gasped Kurt smiling brightly and completely forgetting about the flowers.

"So, did you two decide on the flowers?" asked Tina. "Are you ready to leave for lunch?"

"Kurt was over an hour late," said Rachel, exasperatedly. "So, we haven't had a chance to decide on a single thing, yet. We aren't even certain of colours."

"It isn't _my_ fault you left such an incredibly important aspect of your wedding planning to last minute," bit back Kurt sharply before turning an incongruously warm smile back to Mercedes.

Mercedes smiled and rolled her eyes at Kurt in mutual understanding.

"Have you discussed anything?" asked Diana, tilting her head to the side as she regarded the mismatch of flowers in Kurt and Rachel's hands.

"Well," said Rachel, glancing around the store for a moment. "I think I'll probably just go with white roses, maybe some lilacs thrown in to continue the whole purple theme."

Kurt paled as the girls all nodded thoughtfully.

"Kurt was trying to talk me into orange," she stage-whispered with a dramatically scandalized expression. Then she turned to Kurt with narrowed eyes and demanded, "Is this like the time in high school when you gave me that 'makeover' to try to attract Finn?"

"Rachel," exclaimed Kurt, shaking his head. "Don't, oh my g... nevermind. Just don't use lilacs, that's terrible. If you are going to go with the white roses, at least use delphiniums or lisanthus with them"

"I think Kurt might be onto something with the orange," said Tina thoughtfully. "What if you used orange lilies and some pale yellow roses with some purple flowers?"

"Ooh," said Kurt, turning to Tina with interest. "I like how you think. I was trying for something a lot more playful, but your idea would be really quite lovely. Orange... but understated."

Tina beamed at him.

"I'm not using orange," said Rachel, huffing. "It would look terrible with my skin tone."

Kurt rolled his eyes.

"It's just a couple of flowers, Rachel. You aren't _wearing _head-to-toe orange like some sort of crazed super-villain," he said in exasperation. "That would be me and my psychopathic purple suit."

"Okay, well, hurry up and choose something. I didn't have breakfast this morning because the time zones are messing with me and now the lunch hour is nearly over and I'm getting cranky," said Mercedes.

"I liked Kurt's idea with the delphinium with your white roses," said Diana with a shrug. "It would be really simple, but quite elegant."

Rachel let out a long breath of air, visibly deflating. Kurt tried to keep from smiling smugly, secretly delighted to have Diana's support for once... even if he was a little disappointed that they weren't going with his fabulous orange idea.

"Okay," she sighed. "I'm trusting you two in your judgement here, seeing as I don't even know what a delphinium looks like."

Kurt managed to refrain from snorting and Diana shot him a wink.

"See if they'll throw in some orange Gerber daisies," she said just as Rachel began walking to the counter to place an order.

The look of affront on Rachel's face was enough to get Kurt turning to hide his own in Mercedes' shoulder as he chuckled.

"So," said Mercedes while they waited for Rachel to return. "Who are you bringing to the wedding, Kurt? I heard you and Benjamin broke up -I'm sorry about that, Baby."

Kurt shook his head and tossed his hand to the side.

"Whatever," he said flippantly. "He was a douche bag and probably too young for me, anyway. At least _I_ broke up with _him_, this time."

The sympathetic look Mercedes gave him didn't sting quite so bad as his mind flitted back to Sebastian. A small smile grew on his face.

"I'm bringing Sebastian," he admitted, then.

"Sebastian?" asked Mercedes. "Sebastian Who? Do I know him?"

Kurt shook his head and was about to speak when Rachel showed up.

"Kurt, I need you to come tell them what that flower was again... Sebastian? What about Sebastian?"

"Kurt's bringing him to the wedding as his date," said Mercedes.

Rachel's eyes widened.

"You invited _Sebastian_?" she exclaimed in horror. "Your creepy, date-rape neighbour?"

"Date-rape?" asked Mercedes, looked over at Kurt with wide eyes.

"There's no story there," deadpanned Kurt shaking his head. "Rachel's just being dramatic and wildly inappropriate."

"What's inappropriate is bringing that meerkat-faced sexaholic to _my_ wedding," replied Rachel, her voice getting louder and higher-pitched as she spoke.

"Rachel," said Tina in a low, soothing tone that still bore much command. "Don't overreact, Kurt doesn't have bad taste. You know he wouldn't bring a sex criminal to your wedding."

"Bridezilla emerges," Kurt whispered under his breath to Mercedes while Tina spoke.

"What about the magician and his 'sexy magic' Kurt brought to your twenty-third birthday party?" asked Diana with a smirk before turning to Kurt. "What happened to Connor? I thought you were meeting up with him."

"Didn't work out," Kurt said lowly from behind clenched teeth. Before relaxing and shooting Diana a fake-sweet smile. "I think you would really like Sebastian, Diana. He mocks me almost half as much as you do."

Diana raised a finger and opened her mouth to reply but Kurt didn't get to hear her response because the other girls started speaking.

"What happened to Blaine Anderson?" asked Rachel. "I thought Sebastian was helping you find him. Or did you two start sleeping together and decide give up on that?"

Kurt's mouth when dry.

"I... no..." he stammered. "No, he's still looking for him."

Rachel's eyes widened.

"So you _did_ have sex with him," she exclaimed. "Is that what you're saying? You and Sebastian are sleeping together?"

"Oh, no!" exclaimed Tina, turning to Kurt with disappointment etched on her face.

"No!" said Kurt, his voice coming out high-pitched. "I didn't!"

No one looked convinced. Kurt raised his hands up as if to show he was innocent.

"I didn't," he pushed.

"Good," said Diana. "Don't."

"What?" snapped Kurt. "Why?"

"He's not the kind of guy you end up with," she said. "He's the kind of guy you fool around with before you meet the guy you end up with."

"Guys like him, Kurt," interjected Rachel, "they'll say anything to get you into bed. They'll lie right to your face."

"You don't even know him," said Kurt, feeling backed into a corner and panicky, despite the beautiful flowers all around him.

"No," agreed Diana. "But you do."

Kurt's brow furrowed.

"You really think he's the kind of guy who will want to settle down with you, Kurt?" she asked. "He's a one-night-stand kind of guy, am I right? He doesn't do commitments. But, hey, he might be serious about you, who knows? Still, do you think he'll be in it for the long run? A long relationship is probably one or two months to him. You're not getting any younger. You don't have time for another dead-end relationship."

Kurt felt emotion tying his throat in a knot as Diana spoke. Her words were bringing all his issues to the surface, all his fears with starting something with Sebastian. It made him feel small and vulnerable and he hated it.

"Who says we're anything but friends?" asked Kurt, eventually, trying to sound unaffected. "He's my neighbour who's been helping me find my exes. We're _not _slee... having sex. Yes, he's coming as my plus one but only as a favour to a friend and probably because of the open bar. So, can we just drop it, now? Mercedes is hungry."

The girls looked mostly mollified with Kurt's explanation, Diana still a little judgmental and Rachel still a little wary.

"Okay," said Rachel after a short pause. "Come up to the counter with me and make sure I asked for the right flowers. They said that they could add in a few others to make everything work with the colour scheme."

Kurt followed Rachel up to the counter feeling a little shaky on his feet.

* * *

That evening, Kurt sat down at the desk Sebastian had given him and began to go through his old sketchbooks. He smiled to himself as he paged through the drawings and notes he had made over the years, trailing his fingers over different drawn outfits and matching swatches of fabric he had stapled to the pages. He flipped to an empty page and began to draw out some wedding tuxes, all the emphasis on Rachel's wedding lately was making him think about his own, someday. It wasn't his fault that the other groom's body type seemed to look a lot like Sebastian's tall, lean frame that was made beautifully classic with the black tux he was designing.

He had spent just over an hour drawing when the phone beside him vibrated to life with a new text. Kurt pushed on the screen and suddenly realized he had mixed up his phone with Sebastian's. He was about to dial his number to call Sebastian and tell him, when he noticed the title of the message.

_Info on Blaine Anderson_

He opened the message to see the old conversation between Sebastian and whoever it was who had just texted. It was a few days old.

To Seb (Tues.):  
_I got u a number. 212-655-3214_

From Seb (Tues).:  
_Thanks man, I owe you big._

To Seb (Tues.):  
_Hell yeah u do!_

To Seb (Fri.):  
_Hey man. Did you pass on the # to Kurt? You never told me if it worked out._

Heart hammering in his ears, Kurt shakily set the phone back down. He braced himself with both hands on the desk, closed his eyes and just breathed for a few moments. Rachel's words echoed in his mind and tore at his heart; _'Guys like him, Kurt, they'll say anything to get you into bed. They'll lie right to your face.'_

* * *

**A/N:** You can find me on tumblr! My username is _idareu2bme_ and all my Number Twenty related posts are tagged _fic: Number Twenty_


	8. Chapter 8

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali, lurkdusoleil, **  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Sex,_ Klaine Angst_

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did _take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story.

* * *

**_Chapter Eight_**

* * *

After a few deep breaths, Kurt managed to get a hold of himself. He quickly wiped at two stray tears half-hoping that if he wiped them away fast enough it would be like they hadn't happened. His hands still felt jittery, but he picked up his pencil to get back to his drawing anyway. He was just about to put pencil to paper when his apartment door opened and Sebastian came in.

"Honey, I'm home," he called out jokingly.

Kurt tensed.

"So, I brought over some DVDs to watch," said Sebastian, sauntering into the open-concept room and from the sound of his voice, he was most likely grinning widely - maybe even a little bit smugly, as if proud of himself. Kurt wouldn't know for sure, though, because he just really couldn't look at him right then. "And, I cooked! Okay, so, they are supposed to be taquitos, but they look more like cannolis, and they kind of taste like egg rolls... but, I like all those things, so, they should be okay."

Kurt didn't answer. He glanced out of the corner of his eye to see Sebastian set down a covered plate on the counter before heading his way. Kurt quickly turned his attention back to the suit he was drawing. He bit his lip when he saw how much the model in his drawing looked like Sebastian and quickly turned the page back to a different drawing.

"Oh," said Sebastian, happily, obviously still not catching on to the hostility Kurt _had_ to be emanating. "You're working! That's great, don't let me bug you."

Sebastian kissed the back of Kurt's neck and Kurt stiffened even further at the contact. The sweet, simple domesticity of it was something he had longed for and yet, was something so completely unwelcome in that moment. He ground his teeth as Sebastian all but skipped away to go plunk down on his couch.

Kurt waited until Sebastian was settled on the couch before letting his shoulders drop. He took a few moments after that to be sure his voice would be even when he spoke. Then, he took a breath, closed his eyes, and put his dusty, old acting skills to work.

"Hey, so," he called over his shoulder, lightly. "Just out of curiosity, did you ever track down Blaine Anderson?"

"Um, no," replied Sebastian. "Why?"

Tears of anger pricked at Kurt's eyes all over again and he had to work harder to control his voice when he spoke again.

"Oh, just wondering," said Kurt, shrugging. "But, really? No _phone numbers_? Nothing?"

"Nope."

Kurt closed his eyes and breathed in and out a few times. Sebastian was lying through his teeth, right to his face - well, to his back, but still. He closed his sketch book and set it aside, then meticulously put away his pencils. When he was finished, he stood up, mindful not to look toward the couch where Sebastian was, and made his way to the kitchen to wash his hands in the sink.

"Okay, well," he said as he turned on the water. "I'm pretty busy right now, so maybe you should go."

The room suddenly took on a very still quality, as if both participants stopped breathing and time had halted in anticipation of the inevitable fall-out that was about to ensue. Kurt turned off the water, feeling Sebastian's eyes on his back, and dried his hands. He briskly walked across the room, grabbed the cell phone from his desk, and dropped it in Sebastian's lap over the back of the couch as he passed him again.

"I'll see you later," cut out Kurt before nearly running to his bedroom, his bottom lip trembling as his eyes continued to prick with fury.

"_Shit," _he heard Sebastian curse behind him before he kicked his bedroom door shut.

Kurt leaned back against his bedroom door as the tears started to fall. He couldn't believe he had been so foolish to think he could have something special with _Sebastian_.

"Kurt," called out Sebastian from the other side of the door. "Kurt, Kurt, please..."

"Just go," replied Kurt. "I don't want to hear your lies."

"Alright, alright, yes," said Sebastian, sounding panicky and flustered. "Yes, I was able to get Blaine's phone number but... but I didn't think it mattered now."

"Would you _please_ just go," pleaded Kurt.

"Is this because of Blaine?" asked Sebastian sounding a mixture of angry and regretful and altogether upset. "I thought..." he paused and when he spoke again his voice was so small that it would have broken Kurt's heart had it not been pulverized so many times before. "What about last night?"

"Let's just pretend last night never happened," replied Kurt, coldly.

There was a long pause. Had Kurt not been leaning against the same door that Sebastian was undoubtedly also pressed against on the other side, he wouldn't have heard the shuddery intake or the next words.

"I... Kurt... I don't want to pretend it never happened..." whispered Sebastian brokenly. "It was... the best night."

Kurt wiped furiously at his eyes. He was _not_ going to let Sebastian do this; he wasn't going to let him get under his skin like this.

"Go," he said as evenly as he could. "You're not the kind of guy I'm supposed to be with and I want you to go."

There was another pause.

"What kind of guy am I?" asked Sebastian, his voice suddenly dark and a little dangerous.

Kurt should have kept his mouth shut; he should have just left it and spent the rest of the night curled up in his comforter.

"You're the kind of guy you date before you meet the guy you end up with," said Kurt, closing his eyes and regretting every word as he said it. "I've already been with nineteen of you. I can't waste my time on another man-slut who just wants to get his rocks off with me."

He could hear Sebastian's sharp intake of breath.

"So, you're going to try to get back together with this Blaine guy who you haven't seen in years, who didn't work out the first time, just so that you don't go over the number twenty?" asked Sebastian, coldly.

"It's not just about a number anymore, okay?" Kurt snapped.

"Then what_ is_ it about, Kurt?" shouted Sebastian.

"It's... it's about what I _want_!" yelled Kurt, balling his fists at his sides.

"You don't know _what_ you want," countered Sebastian. "You're so busy worrying about what other people think that you don't even know who you are!"

Kurt bit his lip as Sebastian's angry words sunk in. Sebastian was breathing heavily on the other side of the door.

"You're worried about magazine stats and other people's criticisms, so busy dredging up the past and worrying about the '_what could have been's_', that you don't even try. You don't even try, Kurt." said Sebastian, his voice going a little softer as if with resignation. "You could have everything you want, if you'd only stick your neck out just a little bit instead of worrying about failing or what other people might think. Just... try."

Kurt sank to the floor, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He buried his face in his knees to keep Sebastian from hearing his little sobs, but everything Sebastian had said was true. He was stuck and his little quest wasn't getting him unstuck like he had hoped; If he couldn't have this, then what _could_ he have?

"At least I've _had_ relationships," said Kurt, pushing back at Sebastian in his hurt. "All you do is sleep around and try to escape the consequences in the morning."

"That might have been true, until... I met... you," replied Sebastian.

Kurt's poor, mutilated heart gave a painful twist in his chest.

"Well, I'm sure if we _had _slept together, you'd be long gone by now," said Kurt, putting all his anger and hurt into the words he didn't for a second want to believe. "Because that's who you are, Sebastian, and that's who you'll always be."

"Fine," cut out Sebastian before letting out a long, sad sigh. His next words were weary. "I'll... I'll text you the phone number and you can give him a call. Bye, Kurt."

* * *

Kurt was pleasantly surprised at how enthusiastic Blaine was upon hearing from him. It was enough to push his heartbreak to the side, at least momentarily. They arranged to meet for dinner the very next night and Kurt spent his entire Saturday getting ready. He even spent some time altering his best suit to look a little more chic, tailoring the jacket to taper to his waist a little more snugly and his trousers to fit a little nicer. Blaine was rich and well-known and, by the photos of him in recent magazines, even dreamier than Kurt remembered him. It wouldn't do for Kurt to show up in something that was so obviously straight off the rack.

Kurt arrived at the restaurant first, which was probably a good thing because it gave him time to get over his wide-eyed wonder at the grandiosity of the place. Columns and statues and fountains, everyone with an important air to them, live classical music with string instruments being delicately played by people in suits... the place was breathtaking, if not intimidating.

Once he had been shown to his seat, Kurt looked around the room trying to mimic the upper-class air of some of the people he saw. Had he made it as a Broadway star, he would probably feel comfortable in such settings, but as it turned out, the unemployed office employee didn't quite feel at home. And then, suddenly, it felt like everyone in the room stopped speaking and held their breath. Even the small orchestra stopped playing, it appeared - or maybe it only seemed that way - when Blaine Anderson walked into the room in slow motion. His smile was bright and white and so ridiculously charming that Kurt didn't know whether to swoon or to scoff... he decided to swoon.

Blaine stopped to greet a few different people on his way to their reserved table, but his smile changed to something a little more genuine and subtly excited when his eyes landed on Kurt. Kurt was definitely swooning now.

"Dreamy as ever," he muttered under his breath as his heart fluttered in his chest.

He politely stood from his seat as Blaine approached.

"Blaine," he breathed, smiling at him.

"Kurt," replied Blaine, his eyes doing their big, warm, puppy-dog thing that they used to do back in high school.

They sat at the opposite ends of the small table and simply stared at each other for a few moments before both laughing at their ridiculousness.

"It is so amazing to see you, Kurt," said Blaine, finally. "It has been so long."

"It really has," answered Kurt, smiling a little too brightly. He couldn't help the nostalgic emotion that rose within him at being in Blaine's presence. He was the boy Kurt never really got over, after all.

A waiter came and presented them with a bottle of wine that was on the house because of Blaine. They both spent some time looking at their menus, Kurt wanting to speak but not knowing which words to use and Blaine looking like he was feeling the same. After they had ordered, Kurt asked Blaine to fill him in on everything in his life.

"Well," started Blaine. "I went to university for my masters in business..."

Kurt was surprised at that, and spent the better portion of Blaine's spiel reeling. He was having a hard time imagining Blaine at eighteen deciding to take his father's advice and not try for something in music or performing arts. He hoped it didn't have anything to do with their breakup.

"Cooper's finally given up his ridiculous stint in Hollywood and is now handling the business side of things," continued Blaine, and Kurt had to hurry to catch up after spending too much time thinking instead of listening. "When my dad asked me to work on the foundation side of things, it was sort of a natural fit for me, you know? I mean, I've never really been good at the whole money-grubbing end of things, it's a lot easier for me to give it away... I'm rambling. I'm sorry. I can hear myself and I'm rambling."

"No," said Kurt, shaking his head and smiling. "No, not at all. We wanted to get caught up... and you're catching me up."

Blaine smiled at Kurt in a way that seemed so familiar and yet, was so foreign. So much time had passed and he didn't really know this Blaine Anderson, but he could see traces of his high school boyfriend in him. It was a strange feeling, like being able to somehow look back on their possible future in a most melancholic sort of way, but it was also really quite exciting for the same reason.

"I bet Cooper was really heartbroken to give up acting," said Kurt, trying to tamp down the prevalent butterflies in his belly with conversation.

"Well," said Blaine, thoughtfully while a gently amused expression crossed his handsome features. "He really didn't get much better than his stint as the credit rating spokesperson back when we were in high school. Do you remember?"

"Free credit rating today dot com," Kurt sang softly with a grin on his face.

"Slash savings," added Blaine with a small chuckle.

Kurt grinned widely at him from behind his hand.

"Anyhow," continued Blaine. "Like I said, he didn't really do much better than that, a few random appearances on episodes of lesser known shows, a few commercials. There wasn't much to his name and none of us are getting any younger. I mean, he was nearly forty and still didn't even have an actual career when Dad talked him into coming to work with us." Blaine shrugged before reaching for his glass of wine. "I'm all for following your dreams and whathaveyou, but you've got to be realistic; you know?"

Kurt tensed at Blaine's last statement. It sounded terribly close to the very same one he had heard Blaine's father use on Blaine countless times when they were in high school - nearly word for word, actually, even if it might not have carried as much disdain in the presentation.

"He's doing well, though," said Blaine. "I think he's enjoying it. So, how about you? Last I heard you were in marketing?"

"Well," said Kurt, suddenly feeling embarrassed and inadequate. "I'm kind of between jobs right now, to be honest."

"Oh, well, listen," said Blaine, his face nothing but earnest helpfulness. "Just say the word and I can get you an interview over at Andersons."

"Oh, no, thank you, no," said Kurt, shaking his head and feeling his cheeks redden with further embarrassment even while his chest warmed with affection for Blaine. "That's... not why I wanted to see you."

"Oh?" asked Blaine, biting his lower lip and giving Kurt something of a coy smile.

Kurt smiled back before lowering his eyes to the table. It felt so much like their coffee dates back when they had first gotten together; the sudden flirtatious air between them.

"I... uh, actually," started Kurt, wanting to move the conversation forward even though a part of him was relishing the undercurrent of sexual tension reminiscent of their past. "I'm considering making a change. A career change," he unnecessarily added seeing as today's Blaine seemed to put a lot of stock in 'careers'. "I want to get into the fashion industry, maybe try my hand as a designer."

"Oh," said Blaine, smiling politely as his eyebrows rose in surprise. "How very adventurous of you."

Kurt's smile faltered only slightly at that.

"Yes, well," said Kurt, running his fingertip over the silverware as he shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "We're not getting any younger, right?"

Blaine laughed fondly.

"Oh, how I've missed you, Kurt," he said.

Kurt looked up in time to see the fond expression on Blaine's face and he melted a little, his smile turning more genuine again.

* * *

Kurt woke the next morning with thoughts of the evening shared with Blaine on his mind. Even though Blaine was even more gorgeous with ten more years under his belt, was very much interested in getting reacquainted with Kurt, and there was still some sort of spark between them, Kurt couldn't help but notice how his thoughts had often strayed to Sebastian during their date. He couldn't help but measure Blaine against Sebastian even though he had spent the last ten years struggling with the persistent habit of measuring suitors against his memories of Blaine.

He wondered what Sebastian was up to and whether he could forgive him for having said the heinous things he had. Kurt quickly got out of bed and dressed with plans to go across the hall to apologize. He wasn't sure what he would do about the whole Blaine versus Sebastian issue, but he didn't want to leave off with Sebastian how they had.

After a cup of coffee in attempts at combating his nerves, Kurt took a deep breath and pushed open his apartment door. As fortune would have it, he stepped into the hallway at the same time as a very familiar face that was decidedly not Sebastian's came out of Sebastian's apartment. Kurt stopped short, confusion clouding his brain for a few moments before he gasped.

"Tristan," he hissed. "What the hell?"

"Oh, hey Kurt," replied his friend (soon to be ex-friend) and drinking buddy with a guilty smile. "Kind of early for you to be up on a Sunday morning isn't it?"

Kurt's blood boiled with fury.

"Kind of the wrong apartment for you to be leaving so early on a Sunday morning isn't it?" shot back Kurt even as his stomach rolled with the thoughts of exactly why Tristan was leaving Sebastian's apartment with that familiar smug but guilty look on his face.

Tristan just shrugged back at Kurt before calling his goodbyes back into the apartment and closing the door.

"I'll see you around, Kurt," he said before hurriedly trotting down the stairs.

Kurt wasn't sure whether he was furious, heart-broken or just plain sickened as he watched Tristan leave. Of course, that was the moment Sebastian opened the apartment door and poked his head out.

"Hey, 'Tan," called Sebastian from behind a lazy grin. "You forgot your underwear."

"Keep them," Tristan called back, now out of sight as he descended the stairs. "As a token of my appreciation, or a reason to call me again, whatever."

Sebastian was smirking but his face immediately paled when his eyes landed on Kurt.

"Kurt," breathed out Sebastian, his mouth pulling down in a deep frown as his face continued to lose its colour. How white would it turn?

"Sebastian," bit back Kurt vehemently.

"Kurt, I..."

"Whatever," said Kurt, dismissively. "It's none of my business who you fuck, even if it is one of my exes and current friends. Far be it from me to judge you for using my list as your own personal little black book."

Sebastian looked painfully distraught, but Kurt didn't give him a chance to reply as he quickly slammed his apartment door shut. He stormed back to his bedroom and picked up his cell from its usual spot on his bedside table. He swiped at his contacts list with his finger before pressing on the newest contact, Blaine Anderson, to send him a new text message.

_To Blaine:_  
_Last night was great. I would love to get together again soon._

Only after pressing the send button did Kurt allow his face to finally crumple. He dropped his phone back onto the bedside table before sinking to his bed and letting his head fall into his hands. Silent sobs shook his shoulders.

* * *

The wedding was only days away when Kurt got the excited phone call from his father. He was out having lunch with Rachel when it happened.

"I can't believe you kept this a secret!" exclaimed Burt into the phone and Kurt had a shocked moment where he couldn't tell if his father was angry or elated.

"Um," stammered Kurt. "Hello to you, too, Dad."

"Carole and I were out for a walk this morning when we passed a newsstand," continued Burt without preamble. "Do you know what we saw on the cover of NN Magazine?"

"Oh, Dad," said Kurt, rolling his eyes and smiling. "You know you can never believe anything NN prints, right?"

Rachel gave Kurt a confused smile from across the table, setting down her teacup and cocking her head to the side in silent askance. Kurt just shook his head.

"So you and Blaine Anderson _didn't _go out together Saturday night?" asked Burt.

"What?" choked out Kurt.

"There was a photo of you and Blaine Anderson on the cover, it wasn't _the _cover photo, but there was a small photo and then when I opened the magazine to the page number beside it... there were a _lot_ of photos," rambled Burt in an almost school-girl like tremor that was ridiculously unlike him.

"We're so excited for you, Hun!" called out Carole in the background.

"So, are you two an item now?" asked Burt, his excitement practically shaking the phone in Kurt's hand.

"I... um..." Kurt didn't know what to say, he looked up at Rachel to see her scrolling excitedly through her phone, undoubtedly thinking they must have been talking about photos of her and Finn when she heard Kurt say NN and looking it up online. Ever since saying 'yes' to Finn when he had proposed, she seemed to think the entire world was interested in her wedding.

"Kurt!" gasped Rachel, then, looking up at him with wide eyes and a hopeful smile.

Kurt sighed in exasperation and put his cell on speaker phone before setting it on the table between them. He didn't want to have this conversation any more times than necessary.

"We're taking it slow, Dad," said Kurt. "Just getting reacquainted for now."

Carole squealed at the same time as Rachel, and Kurt had to repress the urge to cover his ears.

"That is so great, Kiddo," said Burt enthusiastically. "I still have your high school graduation photo on my cell; I'm going to text it to you after this call. You two looked so great together, you in your red graduation gown and Blaine in his suit. He was so proud of you. We all were."

Kurt bit his lip at the 'were' even if it had been unintentional on his father's behalf.

"That's okay, Dad," said Kurt. "I'm sure I have plenty of photos of us in my apartment."

"I'm just so excited!" said Burt, laughing at himself.

"Are you bringing him as your date to the wedding?" asked Carole.

Kurt's mouth went dry at that. He looked up from the phone and caught Rachel's eye. She was grinning hopefully at him.

"I... yes?" he answered, deflating.

Carole and Rachel both squealed again. Kurt rolled his eyes and dropped his head in his hand as some of the other restaurant patrons looked in his and Rachel's direction. They were out on the patio, but New York's noisy streets couldn't block out Rachel's voice.

"I knew he was the one," sighed Burt happily.

Kurt could hear the relief in his father's voice, as if now that Blaine and Kurt were back together, Kurt wouldn't be lost anymore. His stomach lurched, but perhaps his father was right.

* * *

The next few days were a blur of time spent with Rachel, who was growing ever more panicky as her wedding day approached, and with Blaine. One time they even had a double date with Rachel and Finn, which went so well that Kurt had to admit that perhaps Blaine was the perfect fit for his life. He already knew Kurt's family and many of Kurt's long-time friends and he and Blaine were finding it quite easy to fall back into rhythm with each other. Still, there were moments when he grew silent and had to remind himself that he wasn't the same Kurt - and Blaine wasn't quite the same Blaine. Really, he seemed more like the Blaine Anderson Kurt met on the Dalton steps (suave, faux-confident, and possibly a little lost -definitely repressed) than the Blaine Anderson he had so loved. Both Blaine's were so easy to love, though, that Kurt pushed through his moments of unease.

He felt a little out of place at the function he attended with Blaine the Friday night before Rachel's wedding, but then Blaine would smile at him and he would practically melt. He wasn't even sure what the evening was for –some sort of fundraising event through Andersons, no doubt. He wondered at all the press Blaine would probably get by being seen publicly with a male companion at his side. They didn't engage in any sort of PDA, not having even kissed yet since being reunited, but it was quite obvious that Kurt was Blaine's date at the event. He wondered how Blaine's father felt about it and what Blaine was thinking, knowing that it had to be causing some sort of issue between him and his father who was running on his whole 'Traditional Values' campaign.

When Kurt got home late that night, he heard faint music as he climbed the stairs. He would have just assumed someone had music playing on their stereo were he not newly privy to the knowledge that Sebastian and his band practiced on the roof. Kurt paused on the last step of the stairs leading to his floor and listened. He couldn't make out the words, but he heard a mellow crooning voice, kind of like Sebastian's, over an alternative soft rock sound. The voice sounded heartbroken. Kurt's chest tightened with emotion and he quickly moved to his apartment door, unlocking it with stiff fingers and blurring eyes.

* * *

**A/N:** You can find me on tumblr! My username is _idareu2bme_ and all my Number Twenty related posts are tagged _fic: Number Twenty_


	9. Chapter 9

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali &** lurkdusoleil  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Gay Sex, _Blaine_

**Note:** By 'Blaine' I mean that if you are a die-hard Klainer, you might have a hard time swallowing how Blaine is portrayed in this story as well as the angst around their break-up. I don't want to paint Blaine as a villain because I love him, and I don't think I _did _make him out to be one, but I figured I'd warn for previous Klaine and the portrayal of Blaine as _not_ Kurt's one and only. In canon, Klaine is my OTP, but I like to multiship with fanfics.

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did_take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story. Trust Sam to take a light-hearted, stupid rom-con and turn it into an angsty story. Hah.

* * *

**_Chapter Nine_**

* * *

"At long last!" exclaimed Rachel after throwing open her front door in the most dramatic of fashions. "It's my wedding day!"

Kurt beamed at her, dropping his bags to gather her in his arms for a hug.

"I'm so happy for you, Rachel," he exclaimed giving her one last squeeze before letting her go and gathering up his things again. "Okay, let's get inside, we have a very special event to dress for!"

Kurt allowed Rachel to lead him into the bustling little townhouse and up the staircase to her and Finn's master bedroom where Tina, Mercedes, and Diana were getting dressed.

"You're here," exclaimed Tina excitedly as she flounced over to Kurt in her bright purple bridesmaid dress. It wasn't zipped and fell down her shoulders as she moved, but she ignored it to throw herself into Kurt's arms.

Laughing, Kurt hugged her before turning her around so he could zip the dress up.

"Rachel," sounded Carole's voice from outside the room. A few moments later she was poking her head in through the door. "Rachel, the hairstylist called and she'll be here in twenty minutes. Oh! Hi, Kurt! I didn't see you come in. Have you been here long, Hun?"

"Just got here," replied Kurt, shaking his head.

Carole stepped further into the room and gathered him up in her arms for a hug before kissing his cheek.  
"I'm just about to head back to the hotel to deal with the men," said Carole. "Did you want to come or do you have plans with these lovely ladies?"

"No!" cried out Rachel and Tina at the same time which made them both laugh.

"Don't take away our Kurt," said Rachel.

"I think I'm staying," laughed Kurt. "I'll see you at the wedding, Carole."

Carole nodded, smiling, and backed out of the door. Once she had left, Kurt turned back to the girls in the room just in time to get his arms filled with a hysterical Rachel.

"It's my wedding day," she sobbed and Kurt let out a sigh.

"It is," he agreed, patting her shoulder lightly. "And you need to finish getting ready so you can go enjoy it."

* * *

Kurt managed to help get all the ladies ready, securing the top of an errant zipper on Tina's dress with a strategically placed stitch, while simultaneously placating an angry Rachel intent on halting all activities to file a complaint with the store concerning the zipper malfunction. The doorbell rang soon after and Diana left dressed in her grooms(wo)man attire to go answer it while Kurt cleared some space in the room for the hairstylist. Once the woman appeared, with Diana helping her carry her supplies, she quickly set up and got started on each of the young women.

While the stylist was hard at work, Kurt went to the second bedroom to don his tuxedo, which Rachel had told him was hanging on the door. He had worn it once earlier that week during a fitting and had been absolutely appalled at experiencing the nightmare in person, though he had to admit to himself that it wasn't actually as bad as he had imagined. He took a few deep breaths once he was alone in the room with the _thing_to steel himself before unzipping the bag to reveal the head-to-toe purple beneath.

The material of the suit was gorgeous. The colour...well... it hadn't changed since the last time he had seen it. It was still a bold plum hue –a little darker than the bridesmaid dresses, but not enough to make it any less _purple_. The silk tie was the same bright colour as the dresses and the shirt was an off-white, or as Tina had called it, papaya whip. Kurt let out a defeated sigh, resigned to the knowledge that he not only had to wear the suit, but would be seen by friends, family and longtime acquaintances in it, not the mention being immortalized on film, thanks to the efforts of the hired wedding photographer. Kurt sighed again at that and reached up to unhook the clothes hanger from the door.

He took his time getting dressed, partly because he knew the girls' coiffures wouldn't be ready for some time yet, but mostly because he wasn't in a hurry to wrap himself in purple no matter how fine the cut nor luxurious the feel. As he dressed in the quiet of the empty room with only the chatter and giggles of the women in the distance, behind closed doors, he allowed his mind to wander.

He thought back to earlier that morning when, as it happened, he left his apartment and stepped into the corridor just as Sebastian was locking his own door. Sebastian was looking absolutely dashing, complete with hair that was actually styled for a change, a clean-shaven face and an elegant black suit. When asked his destination, Sebastian had said he was going to a wedding; a response that momentarily stunned Kurt and gave Sebastian enough time to complete his task turn to the stairs.

"You too, right?" asked Sebastian as Kurt had followed him.

"Yeah," answered Kurt, taken aback at just how much his heart ached at the sight of Sebastian. Still, he wondered what wedding Sebastian was so suddenly invited to.

"Give my best wishes to Rachel," Sebastian had said before disappearing out the front door, jogging to the street to hail a taxi. Kurt had watched him go, feeling empty and so, so alone.

"Kurt?" called out Rachel from the other room and Kurt shook himself from his reverie.

"Yes, Rachel?" he called back.

"Are you dressed, yet?"

"Almost," he said, straightening his tie in the mirror before grabbing for the doorknob.

* * *

The sky was a brilliant blue, the sun warm and shining while a soft breeze played idly with the folds of dresses and tendrils of hair; the weather was cooperating with Rachel's plans perfectly. Kurt stood next to Puck just a few steps behind the lattice wedding arch while they waited for the music to begin. Finn and Rachel's friends and family were already seated on the white folding chairs in the cool green grass of the park. Kurt eyed Puck's beautiful off-white suit with jealousy as he tried to quell his embarrassment over his more colourful ensemble.

The music began to play and together Puck and Kurt stepped forward with their arms linked. Kurt couldn't help but feel a little smug at being able to walk down the aisle with a man who had been something of a bully to him in the early days of high school. Puck didn't seem the least bit uneasy at having to walk with Kurt. He had actually been rather enthusiastic when they were paired at the wedding rehearsal.

When they reached the front, they broke apart, Kurt standing on Rachel's side and Puck on Finn's. Mercedes and Sam (who had flown in the night before) were behind them, followed by Tina and Diana. Then, the music changed and Rachel appeared at the arch. She made her way down the aisle with a dad on either side. She looked divine in her white wedding dress with touches of papaya whip in the intricate lacework studded with pearls, her long dark hair pulled up with a few curling tendrils falling down around her face, and her lovely mauve and cream bouquet in her hand. She was positively managed to tear his eyes off her in time to glance over to see his brother's response. Finn's eyes were shining with unshed tears, his face alight with joy. Kurt felt tears suddenly pricked at his own eyes.

Kurt was glad he didn't have to worry about mascara like the women standing up front along with him. But he knew he probably looked terrible tears kept building in his eyes and his lip kept quivering throughout the ceremony. It was especially hard for him to listen to Finn and Rachel's vows - that they had written themselves - though he couldn't help but laugh with everyone as Finn stumbled on his words and then try to subtly get cues from Rachel for his next lines.

He glanced out over the crowd watching with fond smiles and moist eyes, and his gaze landed on Blaine, who had quickly found Mike and sat with him. Blaine noticed Kurt watching him and smiled brightly at him for a moment before turning his attention back to Finn and Rachel.

Rachel and Finn had been on again and off again over the past ten years. They would get really serious for a while and then their passions would flare too hot and they would break up over the smallest of things only to find each other a few months or, one time, years later. Rachel was always so irritable without Finn in her life and Finn so directionless when they were apart. It was as if they were continuously fighting what was meant to be, but finally,_ finally_they matured and cooled down. They had been together without incident for two years when Finn had popped the question.

Kurt wondered, glancing back at Blaine again, if perhaps he was also meant to be with his highschool sweetheart. Perhaps all he needed was to find Blaine again and they, too, could have a happily ever.

When the ceremony concluded, before taking Finn's arm and walking ceremoniously down the aisle with him, Rachel turned to fling her arms around Kurt's shoulders and pull him in for a tight embrace. She also hugged Tina and Mercedes too before finally turning back to Finn, who was high-fiving Puck. Kurt grinned, rolling his eyes at their antics The wedding party coupled up and walked down the aisle, then, as the music played and the guests cheered.

The oversized gazebo was decorated in banners of off-white linen and purple bows. Tina and Mike danced expertly around it while the majority of the group simply enjoyed stepping back and forth in rhythm to the music. Kurt put his arm over his father's broad shoulders and smiled brightly at him as they danced together, glad that his father was the kind of man willing to dance with his gay son at his step-son's wedding.

"Kurt," said Burt. "Are you happy?"

"Yeah," said Kurt, immediately, though he made a face at his dad in confusion of the question.

"I only want what's best for you," said Burt, glancing over at Blaine and Carole who were dancing together. Carole was sobbing into Blaine's shoulder about her baby growing up and getting married while Blaine awkwardly smoothed a hand over her back. "You know that, right Kurt?"

Kurt turned his attention back to his dad.

"Of course," said Kurt, frowning.

"I want to apologize for my behavior the other day," said Burt with a sigh. "It wasn't my place to say what I did..."

"Dad," said Kurt, smiling sadly. "You're my _dad_, if it were anyone's place, it'd be yours."

"Then maybe it isn't anyone's place," said Burt. "All I want for you is for you to be happy. You're not like me, Kurt. You have your mother's looks, you have my stubbornness, but you are most definitely your own person. And I've always been proud of you for that..."

Kurt sighed and nodded, looking down. There was that past tense again.

"And I'll always _be_proud of you," said Burt, grinning just a little when he caught Kurt's eye. "It just hurts me to see you flounder. I only ever want to see you succeed at life."

Emotion grew in his chest again, making it feel tight. Kurt really couldn't wait for this entire wedding to be behind him, it was becoming ridiculously emotional.

"Thank you, Dad," he managed to whisper.

"I'm sorry if I pressured you one way or another with this new relationship with..." Burt glanced over at Blaine again and Kurt followed his gaze. At least Carole had stopped crying. "You need to do what makes_ you_happy, Kurt."

Kurt nodded, smiling despite the wretched tears in his eyes.

They danced for a little while longer but then the song changed to something even slower and Blaine suddenly appeared at Burt's shoulder.

"Sorry, sir," said Blaine, smiling politely at Burt. "I was hoping I could cut in."

"Blaine Anderson," gruffed out Burt. "You know better than to call me sir."

Blaine grinned at him, then. Kurt chuckled fondly as Burt let go of him to pat Blaine's shoulder. Then Burt left to find Carole and Blaine took his place dancing with Kurt.

"I'm sorry to break up your time with your dad," said Blaine in a low voice. "I know how special he is to you."

The longing in his voice when he talked about Kurt and Burt's relationship was still there even ten years later and Kurt frowned sympathetically.

"I just couldn't slow dance with Carole," admitted Blaine with a shiver.

Kurt laughed.

"She is rather emotional today for _some_reason, isn't she?" he quipped.

Blaine smiled fondly.

"I can't imagine why," he played along.

They danced together for another two songs.

"I'm leaving again in a few days," said Blaine, suddenly.

Kurt leaned back from where he had been resting his chin on Blaine's shoulder.

"What?"

"Father has me going to Milan for him on business," explained Blaine.

"Oh, wow," said Kurt, the prospect of the place exciting even while he deflated knowing that Blaine was leaving again when they were only just getting reacquainted. "For how long?"

"Six months."

"Six... months... wow," stammered Kurt.

"I was..." started Blaine, looking excited and nervous. "I was kind of hoping you would come with me."

Kurt's eyes widened.

"That... wow," said Kurt, not knowing how to respond. Weren't they moving a little fast? They hadn't even kissed yet.

"I know it's really soon after so long apart, but you aren't working right now so it isn't as if anything's keeping you in New York," said Blaine. "And I'd really like to continue to spend time with you now that we've found each other again. Besides, I'm pretty sure Milan would be the place to go if you were interested in getting into fashion."

Kurt was feeling flustered at the amazing offer and the potential surrounding it.

"You wouldn't have to worry about affording anything," continued Blaine. "You'd be staying with me and I could pay for anything else you need while there."

Kurt considered it. It would be a dream come true. It would be everything he had been looking for; a new love, a chance at a new and glamorous life. So, why did it seem less and less appealing as he imagined it?

"Where do you think we'd be if we had stuck together?" asked Kurt, suddenly.

"I don't know," answered Blaine, looking thrown by the question. "Maybe Broadway? Competing for lead roles?"

Blaine chuckled at the thought before turning more serious.

"It doesn't really matter, though, does it? I mean, it didn't happen," he said.

Kurt looked down at Blaine's silk tie, frowning at that.

"I don't blame you, Kurt," said Blaine, then. "I mean, it hurt... I really loved you, but... I understand."

"Loved?" asked Kurt, looking timidly up at Blaine from beneath his eyelashes. "You don't anymore?"

Blaine chuckled softly despite the melancholy of their conversation.

"Well, I'm sure I could again," he said with a sweet smile. "How could I not? But it has been ten years. I'm meeting a brand new Kurt. I want to get to know you. We have history but..."

"It's been ten years," repeated Kurt, finishing Blaine's sentence for him.

Blaine nodded.

"You know," he said. "I spent so much time wondering what I could have done differently to keep you from leaving me; I went over those last few months so many times in my head trying to figure out where I had gone wrong."

Kurt wanted to cry.

"It was never you," he said in a rush of air. "I didn't break up with you because of anything you did, Blaine. It was me. I had a secret and it was just eating me alive. I didn't want you to have to spend a year pining for a boyfriend who was a lie."

"A lie?" asked Blaine, confusion on his face.

Kurt lowered his arm from Blaine's shoulder and grasped his hand to lead him away from the dance. They stepped out onto the grass and walked away from the party to sit on a bench just far enough away to give them a little privacy.

"It had seemed so important to you that we were each other's firsts," started Kurt. "I just hated to think what it would do to you if you ever found out that it wasn't true."

"What?" asked Blaine, shocked. "You... you weren't a virgin."

He didn't look mad, just completely taken aback with surprise.

"Remember Brett?" asked Kurt, looking down at his hands clasped tightly in his lap.

"Um, no... should I?" asked Blaine, running a hand over his gelled hair.

"The pothead kid in my class," said Kurt. "Red hair, always said really odd things... smelled kind of homeless."

Blaine wrinkled his nose as recollection filled his eyes.

"He was... curious," continued Kurt, feeling humiliated as he regaled. "It was after you kissed Rachel at her party and then went on a date with her. I was so upset with you and then you fought with me about being bisexual. Remember?"

Blaine nodded, seemingly too stunned for words.

"Well, Brett was... there... he, um, he came over to do a project with Finn for some class they had together. Finn wasn't home."

Kurt stopped there, not really wanting to give any more information and hoping Blaine wouldn't press for details. Blaine didn't.

"I... so..." stuttered Blaine, obviously still trying to fit this new information into his distant memories of that time. Finally he just shook it off and focused back on Kurt. "Why didn't you just tell me, Kurt? Did you really think that I would have broken up with you over that? We were just dumb teenagers. Did you really think I would have thrown everything away over something like..."

Kurt raised his eyebrows and Blaine faltered.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "Okay, so, I probably would have been upset, but I loved you."

"So, it wouldn't have been a problem?"

"Yes," sighed Blaine. "It would have been a problem... but not insurmountably so."

Blaine shook his head slowly back and forth.

"I can't believe I spent all that time worrying over what I had done..."

"I'm sorry," whispered Kurt.

"...I started second guessing everything," continued Blaine.

"Oh, Blaine," choked Kurt, grabbing his hand and squeezing it.

"Don't beat yourself up over it, Kurt," said Blaine, then, looking up to smile warmly at him even though he looked pained. "It was a really hard year, but we can't change the past, right?"

Kurt paused at that.

"Year?"

"Yeah," said Blaine, nodding emphatically. "Senior year was just horrible with missing you and wondering what I had done to lose you completely. McKinley High was horrible without my best friend. I got through it, though. I graduated and then went to university and then joined my dad in the family business; things have turned out pretty well."

Kurt nodded half-heartedly. Of course Blaine hadn't spent _ten years_ upset over how things had ended between them, only Kurt was pathetic enough to do something like that. Only _Kurt_would be ridiculous enough to ruin the best years of his life living a stunted life because of a high school breakup.

"I'm not mad, Kurt," said Blaine, misreading Kurt's sad face. "You were my first. No matter what, you've always been special to me."

"So, it _does_matter," said Kurt, cocking his head to the side.

Blaine's brow furrowed for a moment before realization triggered on his face.

"No, _love_, Kurt," he said. "My first love. Who cares how many people you've been with? I mean you don't want to be out there sleeping with every guy you meet... unless, um, well, unless that's what you want. What I'm trying to say, though, is that it doesn't matter who you've been with. I mean, I doubt you've been celibate for the last ten years. I haven't - even if my dating scene has been rather pathetic considering my father."

Kurt grimaced at that, wondering again at Jake Anderson's stance on their reunion.

"So," said Blaine. "Now that we've cleared the air, what do you think, Kurt? Will you come with me? This could be our second chance."

Kurt worried his bottom lip between his teeth. Blaine was amazing and charming and sweet, just like he remembered. He was offering him the most amazing opportunity. Still, Kurt couldn't help but worry at putting his entire life in someone else's hands. His love, his live, his career - his entire future - would, once again, be bound to Blaine's. It was like the do-over he had been waiting a decade for, and yet...

Kurt inhaled a deep breath.

This was it. Kurt could recognize this as a defining moment in his life.

"I've been unhappy for a really long time," he admitted. "I kept thinking that if only I could find someone to love me like you did...if only I could recapture how I felt about love and life back in highschool, then maybe I could be happy again... excited about life."

Blaine's expectant smile faltered slightly as he took in Kurt's words. He tentatively touched the back of Kurt's hand and Kurt just smiled sadly and shook his head.

"Blaine," he continued. "I can't do that to you. As much as I had hoped having you again would be my saving grace, I can't expect you, or anyone for that matter, to be solely responsible for my happiness."

Blaine's face fell, as did his shoulders.

"I think you are right and this is our second chance, but... you were my best friend first and foremost. Maybe it is our second chance at being that."

They were both silent, then. The music of the wedding party floated across the grassy field like a scent on a breeze, the sound of conversation and laughter in the distance filling the silence between them.

"I'll call you from Milan," said Blaine, finally.

His smile was genuine even with disappointment in his eyes. Kurt pulled him in for a hug before letting him go. He knew Blaine would call him and perhaps they would find their friendship rekindled. But it felt so freeing to get a second chance at their relationship and actually turn it down. A weight lifted from his shoulders.

"Good bye," whispered Kurt and he suddenly felt released from his high school promise to never say it.

Kurt wiped at his eyes as he walked up the path to the crowded gazebo. Blaine had left after quickly saying his goodbyes to the people he knew and his well-wishes to Finn and Rachel. Kurt had stayed back at the bench to allow him to do so in peace. Carole approached him when he arrived.

"It's time for your speech," she said brightly as she tugged him to the front of the gathering and left him with the wedding singer.

Kurt, though feeling a bit flustered, smiled politely at the singer as the man offered him his microphone. Kurt took a few deep breaths to try to centre himself, still recovering from the emotional exchange with Blaine.

"Hi," he said and a few of the people in the crowd called their 'hi's back at him.

Kurt chuckled nervously before clearing his throat.

"I'm sorry if I get a little emotional," he offered. "But, to be fair, I think I am one of the people who have it hardest today. My very best friend and my only brother just got married."

A few people cheered and Kurt laughed wetly.

"I have to admit, I was a little bit nervous when Rachel first told me they were getting married. She called me right after and squealed into the phone for ten minutes before I could even make out enough of the words to know what was going on."

Kurt paused to wait for the murmur of chuckles to die down, smiling.

"I was worried because of their history," explained Kurt and he caught Rachel's eye as she gave him a stern look. He smirked at her. "For all the time Finn and Rachel have been together, I never really understood why. They just seemed so opposite in so many ways. And, really, who believes in high school sweethearts anyway?"

Finn was grinning at him and Kurt smiled back.

"Love is not just about compatibility, though," he continued. "We all know love isn't easy; and despite it sounding like a good idea, it isn't actually about finding someone who is _easy_to love."

Kurt had to bite his lip to keep his grin from growing too wide as he thought of the next thing he would say.

"Love is finding that someone who drives you crazy," he said and everyone who was privy to Finn and Rachel's rocky relationship laughed at that. Kurt's devilish grin softened then, when he thought about Sebastian. "And who keeps things interesting. Love is finding that someone who pushes you to be unapologetically you and then loves you in spite of it."

Kurt paused again, blinking back a few tears. He laughed at himself as he wiped at his eyes with his free hand.

"Honestly, I didn't think this day would come... and I worried that it would... but Rachel and Finn taught me that love is a continuous choice. You find someone you can be yourself with, who you can scream and cry with, who can see you at your worst and still think the best of you... then you actively make the choice to keep loving that person every single day."

Finn and Rachel put their arms around each other, both beaming at Kurt. Kurt smiled at them before looking beyond them and finding his dad in the group. His dad looked proud.

"To Rachel and Finn, may you choose love every day for the rest of your lives," said Kurt, raising a glass of champagne that one of the band members slipped into his hand.

"To Rachel and Finn!" called out the crowd.


	10. Chapter 10

**Title:** Number Twenty**  
Pairings: **Kurt/Sebastian**  
Rating: **R

**Beta: **canuckpagali**,** lurkdusoleil, & perkytxgirl**  
Warnings: **Promiscuity, Crude jokes, Slut Shaming, Gay Sex, _Blaine_

**Note:** By 'Blaine' I mean that if you are a die-hard Klainer, you might have a hard time swallowing how Blaine is portrayed in this story as well as the angst around their break-up. I don't want to paint Blaine as a villain because I love him, and I don't think I _did _make him out to be one, but I figured I'd warn for previous Klaine and the portrayal of Blaine as _not_ Kurt's one and only. In canon, Klaine is my OTP, but I like to multiship with fanfics.

**Summary: **Kurt's life isn't shaping up to be what he had expected. He's _still _single, he_ isn't _a Broadway star, he's _just_ lost his job (which he hated anyway), and he's about to watch the most on-again-off-again couple known to man get married. To make matters worse, he's just learned that the amount of guys he has slept with is twice as much as what's considered average in the USA. He's pretty sure if sixteen-year-old-Kurt saw himself now, he would be appalled.

Watching "What's Your Number" with my husband the other day, I suddenly felt compelled to try to write that story as a Kurtbastian fic. It just seemed like it would fit really well. I _did _take a lot of liberties with the storyline and with my Glee characters, but hopefully it'll be for the betterment of the story. Trust Sam to take a light-hearted, stupid rom-con and turn it into an angsty story. Hah.

* * *

**_Chapter Ten_**

* * *

Kurt didn't want to stay late at the reception, not with his speech-induced revelation so bright and distracting in his mind. It was difficult for him to remain attentive to everything going on around him through the dinner, even with relatives and old friends approaching him to visit and catch up. Finally, after a few more speeches were given and they had cut the cake, Kurt was able to sneak away as the party began its expected fall from formal to depraved.

It was dark when Kurt arrived home, but the night was still young for a Saturday. Thoughts of Sebastian on his mind, Kurt quickly slipped into his apartment to change out of the wretched purple before he would cross the hall to try to make amends. He had considered leaving the suit on as something of an icebreaker but ultimately decided that asking for forgiveness would be humiliation enough for one evening. Once he was dressed in a pair of slim jeans and a soft sweater, he stepped out of his apartment and across the hall to knock on Sebastian's door. His stomach was nervous and uneasy as he waited for an answer, but no answer came. He knocked again to be sure; still nothing.

Kurt leaned his forehead against the door and let out a sigh of frustration. Sebastian _had_ said he was also going to a wedding. He would probably stay well into the night, drinking and dancing and enjoying himself like Kurt should have been doing. But Kurt knew that he would lose his nerve if he went back to his apartment, so he turned around and slid down the door so that he was sitting with his back against it. Perhaps Sebastian wouldn't be too long.

Eventually, Kurt fell asleep there. When he awoke it was to his name being gently called in a familiar but somewhat confused voice. Kurt slowly opened his eyes and lifted his head, neck stiff from the uncomfortable way he had been sitting.

"Sebastian?" he asked dreamily as he blinked a few times to get his mind back into focus.

"Kurt," said Sebastian who was kneeling in front of him looking a mixture of confused and concerned. "What are you doing?"

"Wanted to talk to you," drawled Kurt before he started to gather his wits.

He had fallen asleep sitting against Sebastian's door and now Sebastian, still dressed devastatingly gorgeous in his trim black suit but his hair slightly dishevelled, was squatting in front of him with worry in his bright eyes and a crease in his smooth forehead. Kurt wanted to trace it with his fingers.

"Are you okay?" asked Sebastian.

"I haven't been okay for a long time," answered Kurt.

Sebastian sighed, sounding frustrated.

"Are you drunk?" he asked, suddenly his voice didn't sound as concerned.

"What?" exclaimed Kurt and that was when he saw the two other men standing behind Sebastian looking entirely uncomfortable. "I'm not... I'm not drunk."

Kurt eyed the two men; they were about his age and both quite attractive, dressed stylishly in suits as if they, too, had been at the wedding. It would be just Kurt's luck that Sebastian would go above and beyond the usual stereotype of using weddings to hook up with people; he would use them to get a sexy threesome.

"You're sitting on the floor in front of my apartment door because you 'wanted to talk to me' and you live just across the hall, Kurt," deadpanned Sebastian.

"You're right," said Kurt, scrambling to get to his feet as humiliation and disappointment burned in his throat. "I'm sorry, I'm being ridiculous. You weren't home and I had just worked up the nerve to come talk to you and I didn't think I would be able to work up the nerve twice and so I didn't want to leave but I see that you have company and I was being really stupid to think that... I don't know what I was thinking. I'm sorry. I'm being inappropriate. I'll... maybe I'll talk to you later."

Kurt quickly pushed past the three men, his sights set on his still-slightly-ajar apartment door. Sebastian caught his wrist, though.

"Work up the nerve for what?" he asked.

Kurt stopped and turned to him. He swallowed nearly audibly, his eyes flicking nervously to the other two men who were still standing there seemingly unsure of what to do. Sebastian looked over at them, too, and grimaced. He dug his keys out of his pocket and tossed them to the shorter of the two men.

"Sorry, guys," he said. "Go on inside, make yourself at home."

They nodded and turned to his apartment door while Sebastian turned his attention back to Kurt.

"We really _should_ talk," he murmured in a low voice. "Can we go into your apartment?"

Kurt couldn't take his eyes away from Sebastian's face, he simply nodded at him and then let Sebastian direct him into his apartment.

They sat on the couch.

"What did you want to say, Kurt?"

Kurt shook himself.

"I just... I wanted to apologize for what I said," said Kurt. "You were right about me and it hurt so I lashed out and... I didn't mean the things I said to you, about you. I don't think that."

Sebastian licked his lips absently. Kurt was studying his face for his reaction but couldn't read it.

"Thank you," said Sebastian, solemnly. "Apology accepted."

Kurt tried to smile at him, but it came out feeling awkward.

"Is that all you wanted to say?" asked Sebastian, then.

"I..."

If Kurt said 'no, there's more' and then proceeded to pour his heart out to this man, to tell him about how he couldn't keep his mind off him, about how he thought he was perhaps falling in love with him, would it be of any use to either of them? Kurt thought of those two attractive men waiting for Sebastian in his apartment and the memory of Tristan leaving the weekend before. Was there any point in Kurt laying himself bare now?

He didn't think he could bear to be turned away if he did.

But what if this was his only chance? If he kept quiet, would he forever regret it? Sebastian himself had bemoaned the fact that Kurt was too afraid to put himself out there. Still, if Kurt didn't say anything, they would be able to go back to their own lives and everything could be the same as it was before any of this had happened.

Except, it wouldn't really be the same, would it? The things Kurt had learned about himself had a lot to do with Sebastian. The desk sitting in his living room where his sewing machine and sketchbooks sat would always remind him of Sebastian. His life would always have a Sebastian-shaped gap in it - there was no setting things back to the way they once were.

"...No, there's something else," said Kurt with a rush of breath.

Sebastian tilted his head to the side to show he had his attention.

"I want to thank you," said Kurt. "I want to thank you for teaching me that love is not about finding someone to _make_ you happy. I don't need someone else to make me happy; I need to be able to make myself happy."

Kurt wanted to laugh at himself as he said those words, it seemed so obvious, now. How could he have possibly thought that he had any business spending all his time looking for someone to love him when he didn't even love himself? Did he actually think it was someone else's job to make him happy? He needed to be happy first; he needed to be content with himself and find happiness in his life and then... then he could find someone to share that happiness with. Kurt didn't need some man to swoop in and save him, he needed to save himself. His heart caught in his chest at that thought. He focused back on Sebastian, then.

"You saved me, Sebastian," said Kurt.

Sebastian immediately started to shake his head 'no' and Kurt smiled at that, raising his hand to stop him.

"You saved me by waking me up to the fact that it wasn't up to someone else to save me, it was up to me," said Kurt.

Sebastian smiled at that.

"Are you sure you're not drunk," he asked.

Kurt laughed but quickly sobered when he remembered the two men who had shown up with Sebastian.

"I'm sorry," he said. "You have people waiting for you, I should let you..."

"No," said Sebastian, putting his hand on Kurt's knee just as Kurt was about to stand. "It's alright."

"But aren't you... aren't they..." Kurt didn't want to say it.

"They live on the other side of town," said Sebastian with a shrug. "It's late; I told them they could crash at my place."

"Oh."

"What were _you_ thinking?" asked Sebastian, suddenly grinning.

"I wasn't thinking anything," replied Kurt, feeling relieved and idiotic at the same time.

Sebastian narrowed his eyes at him, his grin growing.

"You were thinking I picked them up at the wedding," teased Sebastian. "You thought we were going to have a freaky, sexy threesome. You were picturing it in your mind; the writhing, the moaning, the... Oh."

"Oh?" asked Kurt, looking up from where he had been staring at his hands in embarrassment.

"You _were_ thinking that," laughed Sebastian, his voice almost sounding nervous.

"Am I so transparent?" asked Kurt, chuckling pathetically.

"They're in my band. Band members," explained Sebastian. "We were the music for a wedding downtown."

Kurt took that in, it sounded so much better than what he had thought. Even if it seemed strange to him that Sebastian's band played events like weddings.

"Kurt," said Sebastian, imploringly. "I'm so sorry about... about Sunday."

Kurt tensed at that. The memory of seeing Tristan coming out of Sebastian's apartment still made him feel dizzy with the mixture of emotions in induced.

"You... you don't have to be... there's nothing to be sorry for," said Kurt, willing his eyes not to tear up. "There's no reason why you can't be with... Tristan."

Kurt felt sick saying it because it was like acknowledging that it had really happened.

"I learned something this week, too," said Sebastian, then.

Kurt looked at him curiously.

"Maybe there isn't anything wrong with being with a lot of different guys," said Sebastian. "But... but I don't want to be... not anymore."

"You don't?"

"Nope," said Sebastian, shaking his head. He inched closer to Kurt on the couch, the soft smile on his face turning from rueful into something more genuine and even a little smoldering. "There's only one guy I'm interested in and everyone else pales by comparison."

Kurt could feel heat growing on his cheeks as a similar warmth bloomed in his chest. The corners of his mouth were twitching into a smile and he was about to respond but then Sebastian was leaning in to kiss him softly. It was chaste and sweet, but the affection in it stole Kurt's breath away. When Sebastian pulled back, Kurt fought to find equilibrium.

"That's great, really," he said breathlessly, not really thinking straight all of a sudden. "But couldn't you have come to this realization without your dick in someone else's mouth?"

Sebastian sputtered in shock and Kurt wanted to slap himself in the face for ruining the romantic moment.

"How'd you know?" Sebastian stammered.

Seeing Sebastian all wide-eyed because of Kurt's crassness was hilarious and after such a long, emotional day -week, actually, no... month, Kurt couldn't help but burst into a fit of ridiculous giggles. Sebastian narrowed his eyes at him in mock annoyance Kurt rolled his eyes, grinning.

"He's number nine, or did you forget how you met him?"

Sebastian's face fell at that. "Right"

"Yeah," said Kurt, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

"Okay, this just got really awkward really fast," grumbled Sebastian.

Kurt couldn't help but silently agree.

"So," he said in a strained, high voice. "Moving on."

"Does this mean that..." started Sebastian, looking like he was afraid of the answer. "You and Blaine?"

"I turned him down," said Kurt, simply.

Sebastian let out a sigh and rubbed his hands over his face, it sounded like relief which confused Kurt when he saw how dejected Sebastian looked when he looked back up at Kurt.

"I should have given you the number," he said, his voice filled with regret. "I shouldn't have lied; I just... didn't think I could compete with that."

Kurt smiled a little when he saw Sebastian look back down at his hands like a well-chastised child. He hummed softly in response before his smile turned a little wicked.

"I understand," he said, reaching to pat Sebastian on the knee. "I mean, if I were a _wedding _singer, I would have a hard time trying to measure up to a hot-shot businessman, too."

"Hey!" snapped Sebastian, playfully, looking up sharply but smiling tentatively at Kurt.

Kurt lowered his head and leaned into Sebastian's space, grinning fondly.

"You're right," he said, gently. "You should have given me his number; you should have let me decide what I wanted. You tried to take away my chance to figure it out for myself."

Sebastian bit his lip and nodded.

"But," continued Kurt. "Sebastian, you don't have to compete. It never was a competition over my heart, and even if it was, you definitely would have been a contender. As it stands..." said Kurt shrugging and smiling a bit more brightly "...I chose myself, which... by some stroke of fate, includes you." Kurt faltered at that, his face going solemn and questioning. Sebastian _had _just said that he wanted him, but Kurt still felt wrong assuming things. "That is... if you..."

"I definitely do," replied Sebastian, his face erupting with joy

Kurt laughed lightly, overwhelmed and relieved.

Suddenly, Sebastian's hands were cupping his face and Kurt found himself being kissed senseless. His breathing stuttered and he quickly grabbed for Sebastian, fingers clutching at the smooth fabric of his suit. It felt so right to be kissing Sebastian, not just because his lips were amazing on Kurt's, but because it felt real –not just enjoying being with someone or doing it because that's what one does in relationships, but actually connecting physically with someone he was already connected to emotionally. It was thrilling and Kurt was quickly growing drunk with it.

Kurt pushed the blazer off Sebastian's shoulders and he fumbled a little as he pulled his arms from it, their attentions still mostly on the incessant kissing. They broke apart, both panting for air, and Sebastian quickly began loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt while Kurt pulled his sweater up over his head and tossed it aside without flourish. Then he was climbing into Sebastian's lap where the other man was sitting sideways on the couch, facing him. Kurt began kissing up his jaw and then down his throat as Sebastian continued to work the buttons, finally getting enough undone to pull the shirt over his head. Kurt grinned deviously when Sebastian turned back to him after tossing his own shirt to the side, and then he was pushing Sebastian back with all his weight, landing on top of him with an exhaled '_oof_'.

They kissed some more, hands fumbling to touch and smooth over the bared skin. Kurt straddled him, his ass in perfect position to feel Sebastian's arousal as it grew. He shifted his hips and pressed down, causing Sebastian to groan softly into their kisses. Without fully planning to, they began to rock together. Heat was building deep in Kurt's belly, his extremities sparking on particularly good grinds. Eventually, Sebastian tore his mouth away from Kurt's and gazed up at him, pupils blown wide, while he worked for a few seconds to catch his breath.

"We need to either slow down or head to the bedroom," he panted.

There was no way Kurt could slow down.

"What about your band mates?" asked Kurt even while he silently pleaded that Sebastian not go.

"They know where everything is, they've been over before," said Sebastian.

Kurt leaned in to slot their mouths together for a kiss that was supposed to be quick but ended up something more. He teased his tongue against Sebastian's top lip, sensually sucking it in between his own lips while Sebastian ran his fingertips into his hair, cupping his jaw and neck while groaning. When they broke apart, Sebastian looked dazed. Kurt couldn't help but feel smug.

"So," exhaled Sebastian, shakily. "Bedroom?"

"Hell, yes," answered Kurt breathlessly.

They moved together to Kurt's bedroom, climbing onto the bed and losing the rest of their clothing as they went. Kurt laid down on his back, pulling Sebastian ontop of him. Sebastian paused, kneeling over him to look down at him. They had both seen each other naked before, there were no surprises now, but everything was much more intense in this situation. Kurt felt suddenly nervous of what Sebastian saw and whether he would like it. The hunger in his eyes, though, was a pretty good indication that Sebastian was enjoying the sight.

"You are just so gorgeous," whispered Sebastian before leaning in to kiss him.

Kurt grabbed for his head, digging fingers into his hair before loosening his grip and running them down the hinge of Sebastian's jaw, the sides of his neck, and resting them on his shoulders. He licked into his mouth, delighting in the taste of Sebastian that was newly familiar. When they broke apart from the kiss, Sebastian quickly moved his mouth to the thin skin stretched taut behind Kurt's ear. His hot breath and soft lips kissing him there sent shivers through Kurt's body. Sebastian then worked his way down the side of his throat, shifting so that he was crouching over Kurt's thighs and then leaning down so their erections met. Kurt groaned, throwing his head back and pushing up for more.

Sebastian's thrusts and grinding were lazy, though, as he put most of his attention on working his mouth over Kurt's body. His tongue and lips worshiped the soft skin and sparse hair of Kurt's chest. He supported himself with on hand pressed into the bed beside Kurt's head while he ran the fingertips of his other softly over the skin he was about to kiss. Kurt felt like he was drowning it even while simultaneously feeling like he was about to explode. It was as though someone had drained his veins of blood only to fill them with electricity. He was so overcome with the tender way Sebastian's lips kissed each part of him, the way his tongue would peek out to taste him, the way he would suck and nip at his skin like every inch of him was delicious, that it felt like his lungs were struggling to expand.

When Sebastian's mouth finally made it to his hips, Kurt thought he might actually come just from the relief of it after such excruciating build-up. Sebastian laved his tongue over the sensitive skin there, nosing against the neatly trimmed hair, and pressing kisses into the crease of his thighs. It had been forever since Kurt had been given so much attention, since someone had so tenderly drawn this out for him, and Kurt thought his heart was actually swelling in his chest –it was nearly painful. His dick was aching with need for his release and he wanted to cry out to Sebastian to please just put him out of his misery, even while wishing it would never end.

Then, finally, Sebastian's hands were grasping Kurt's thighs and his mouth was sinking over him. Kurt wanted to sob in relief of it. Sebastian's mouth was fantastic velvety heat; he just wanted to push into it over and over with abandon. Sebastian's head bobbed as he fucked him back into his throat before he slowed down and pulled up so he was just teasing at the head. Kurt whined in his throat, grabbing fistfuls of the bed sheets to keep himself from pushing Sebastian's head down. He peeked through scrunched eyelids to see Sebastian grinning around his cock, green eyes staring up at him.

"Seb," ground out Kurt, trying to sound stern but mostly sounding wrecked. "Don't tease."

Sebastian's grin turned wolfish before he sank back down. Kurt groaned and bucked up as the hot, wet, so-good engulfed him again and he pressed deeply into Sebastian's throat. He fucked up into him a few times before Sebastian pulled off again, and Kurt let out a long groan of frustration. Sebastian began licking and kissing at his dick, then, like he had been the rest of his body earlier; tasting it, _worshiping_ it.

Kurt thought he might die.

Then Sebastian was crawling up his body, leaving a trail of hasty kisses as he went before grabbing Kurt's chin and kissing him deep and dirty. Kurt flailed for a moment before grabbing onto Sebastian and returning the kiss with fervour. He wrapped his arms around him and Sebastian sat up, bringing him with him so they were both sitting facing each other. He pulled Kurt into his lap and wrapped a hand around their dicks.

"Hold me," he pleaded in a low whisper that made Kurt shudder before leaning forward to wrap his arms tighter-still around Sebastian.

Their chests were pressed tightly together, their mouths fusing over and over as they panted, and Sebastian's large hand worked them over, their precome and his saliva allowing his movements to stay smooth. Eventually, though, Kurt pulled back far enough to thoroughly lick his own hand and move it down to wrap around the side Sebastian couldn't reach. He dropped his forehead to Sebastian's shoulder as they pumped together, breathing heavily in unison and coming within seconds of each other, the come of the first adding lube and heat to their grips and causing the other to let go.

"Oh g*d," panted out Kurt as they leaned against each other, waiting to come back down.

Sebastian leaned in to kiss him softly, just a tender press of lips before he was leaning his forehead against Kurt's and continuing to attempt to catch his breath.

"So good," gasped Sebastian.

"So, _so_, good," agreed Kurt feeling nearly dizzy from it. "Let me go get a cloth."

"Thanks."

Kurt took a few seconds more to make sure he could balance before untangling himself from Sebastian and crawling off the bed. He felt amazing as he walked on shaky legs to retrieve a cloth for cleanup. Even sated and happy, he couldn't help but imagine how amazing it would be to do other things with Sebastian in the future. He wanted to do everything with him... _everything_. From having Sebastian bend him over the kitchen table to picking out a brand new kitchen table together. Kurt froze with his hand on the faucet he was about to turn on; he wanted to _buy furniture_ with Sebastian. A slow smile grew on his face and he wet the cloth with warm water before quickly heading back to the sexy, wonderful man waiting for him in his bed.

* * *

The next morning Kurt woke to find Sebastian watching him as he lay next to him, his head propped on his hand, and a soft smile on his face. Kurt smiled lazily and stretched his arms above his head, arching his back and humming. He muffled a small yawn with his hand as he turned his attention back to Sebastian and his sparkling green eyes.

"Sleep well?" asked Sebastian, his voice low and soft, sounding intimate and loving.

Kurt let out a happy sigh, nodding his response.

"How about you?" he asked.

Sebastian grinned and reached to pull Kurt close, wrapping his arms around him and pressing his face into Kurt's neck.

"Mmm," he said, his words like kisses against the delicate skin of Kurt's neck. "Probably the best ever."

Warmth bloomed in Kurt's chest as goosebumps appeared all over his arms. He wasn't sure how his body was even holding together with the amount of excitement over the recent developments thrumming through his system.

"What are your plans for today?" asked Kurt once Sebastian had loosened his hold and leaned back far enough that they could see each other's face.

"Well," said Sebastian flirtatiously, but it sounded nearly suggestive when he spoke in such a low timbre and a bout of arousal flared low in Kurt's belly and bubbled up into his chest. "There's this guy I would really like to take out for breakfast but he evaded my last invitation, so..."

Kurt smiled and bit his lower lip.

"You know," he said coyly. "Someone told me about a crepes place not far from here that is supposedly really good."

Sebastian grinned at that and leaned in to lightly kiss Kurt's lips a few times before pulling back.

"I'll go get dressed," he said.

Kurt smiled, feeling altogether ecstatic. Sebastian kissed him one time more before finally getting out of bed, his tall, lean body shamelessly and deliciously nude. Kurt couldn't help but follow the lines and contours of the beautiful body with his eyes. Sebastian moved with a masculine grace one would expect from a dancer or athlete, someone with complete understanding and control of their own muscles and joints. It was mesmerizing to watch the movement under the smooth, sparsely freckled skin. Sebastian was grinning smugly at him when Kurt finally tore his eyes away from his body to meet his eyes. He could feel his own cheeks pink at being caught ogling but he simply shrugged.

Sebastian pulled on his underwear and now wrinkled slacks before returning to Kurt to give him one more quick peck like he really didn't want to leave him even for the short time it would take him to get ready for their breakfast date. Then, he left the bedroom to collect the rest of his clothes from the living room and head to his own apartment. Kurt waited for the sound of his apartment door clicking shut before he let out a whoop of joy followed by a truly mortifying shrill squeal. He heard Sebastian's laughter in the hallway and realized he had heard him. Groaning in embarrassment but still smiling, he allowed himself to fall backwards onto his bed.

* * *

Not much long later, perhaps half an hour or so, found Kurt and Sebastian leaving their apartment building together, dressed and fresh-faced. They walked close together down the sidewalk, the city a constant buzz even on a Sunday morning. The sun was warm and sky above bright blue as if Kurt's joyous mood had dictated the weather.

He eyed Sebastian's hand so near his own as they walked. He thought back to Benjamin who didn't like any forms of PDA if they were at all romantic. Kurt didn't need hand-holding and other silly gestures of romanticism; still, it might be nice... no, Sebastian definitely wasn't the type. Kurt chewed his lip and looked forward again as they reached a road they needed to cross.

"It's just around the corner," said Sebastian as they waited for the light to change so they could cross the street. "I think you'll really like it."

"I'm sure I will," said Kurt, smiling brightly.

"You can get them just drenched in chocolate and fudge sauce and covered in powdered sugar," said Sebastian, grinning. "So, so good."

"Seriously, Seb?" laughed Kurt. "You are going to die of diabetes."

"No," replied Sebastian. "It is so good, you have to get it. Promise me you'll order something criminally sweet."

"I think I'm sweet enough, thank you," said Kurt haughtily.

Sebastian scoffed at that but grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckles before dropping it to their sides and keeping their fingers interlocked as they stepped down onto the street when the light changed. Kurt wanted to be horrified with himself over how the action had started a swarm of butterflies in his stomach as if he were a silly teenager all over again, but he couldn't because Sebastian was holding his hand and smiling fondly at him as they walked down the street. What he wanted out of life might have shifted, and his dreams may have changed, but his ability _to_ dream had returned and the future seemed a hell of a lot brighter because of it.

Kurt was about ready to claim a _Happily Ever After _when suddenly his phone rang in his pocket. He didn't want to let go of Sebastian's hand but he had to in order to answer the phone. He pulled it out and quirked an eyebrow at it seeing an unfamiliar number on the screen. They paused on the sidewalk, stepping to the side to be out of the way of the rest of the pedestrians. Sebastian watched Kurt curiously.

"Hello?" asked Kurt.

"Hello, Kurt?"

"Yes?" answered Kurt, wondering at the voice that sounded vaguely familiar.

"This is Trent," said the voice. "Trent Partridge."

"Oh, wow," said Kurt. "Hi! How are you?"

"Good, well, a little confused," he said, laughing.

"What can I do for you, Trent?" asked Kurt, giving Sebastian a look as he said the name.

"Well, I got a strange phone call from a guy who claimed to be your personal assistant last week," said Trent through the phone speaker pressed to Kurt's ear. "He said something about you wanting to get in touch with your old flames? Well, that wasn't quite how he phrased it but..."

Kurt's eyes widened and he glared at Sebastian who looked amused and a little lost.

"Um," started Kurt, not sure how to answer that.

"Anyway," continued Trent. "I just thought I should tell you that... well, we never... did anything."

"What?"

"We... that night that we saw each other in the bar and went back to my hotel room? Yeah, we didn't... I mean, we planned on it... but then... you passed out before we could," explained Trent, sounding a little embarrassed and somewhat regretful.

"Oh, um," stammered Kurt –what does one say to that? "Thanks for telling me. I—um, thanks."

"I mean," said Trent, sounding unsure. "If you still wanted to meet up sometime, I would love to get together for old time sake. I should tell you, though, I have a boyfriend so it would just be a friendly outing, no..."

"That sounds great, Trent," said Kurt, beaming and hardly containing himself. "We should definitely do that. You have my number so if you are ever in New York again just give me a call."

"Splendid," responded Trent, his voice brightening. "I will do that. Good to hear from you, Kurt."

"Yes, you too. Good bye," said Kurt before hanging up.

Sebastian had his head cocked to the side when Kurt put his cell away. Kurt grinned at him, biting his lip to try to keep it contained.

"That was Trent," said Kurt, on the verge of exploding.

"I gathered," replied Sebastian.

"He said my _personal assistant_ called him last week," said Kurt nearly laughing.

Sebastian grinned cheekily, "Is that so?"

"I guess we never did anything," said Kurt. "We were drunk and I passed out before something could happen."

"Oh?"

Kurt nodded.

"You're my number twenty!" exclaimed Kurt, suddenly, no longer able to contain it.

He threw himself into Sebastian's arms as Sebastian laughed and scrambled to catch him. It had stopped mattering long ago, but still, Kurt couldn't help but feel triumphant with the new knowledge. He kissed over Sebastian's face, holding tightly to him and undoubtedly receiving a few looks from people nearby.

"So," asked Kurt breathlessly when he finally pulled back from his assault. "What are you doing for the next fifty or so years?"

Sebastian's face stretched into a great, big, beautiful smile before he leaned in to capture Kurt's lips with his own. Kurt smiled into the kiss which made it a little awkward for their lips to stay together but it didn't matter. He ran his fingers through Sebastian's soft hair and deepened the kiss, his body thrumming with happiness and excitement. Kurt Hummel could dream again.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

YOU GUYS! I am filled with such a sense of accomplishment being able to tell you that this fic is complete. Wow! Thank you so much for reading, I really appreciate it. Thank you to those who took the time to leave comments, I really appreciate hearing back from you. A very special thank you to my betas who probably worked as hard on this fic as I have (if not harder) and without whom this fic would be a lot less coherent. They have just been amazing, amazing, amazing, reading and pointing out errors, and giving insights and sharing ideas and giving me back-pats and doing some hand-holding when I was unsure... I might not have taken ALL their advice at times, because, lets face it, I'm a stubborn idiot, but without their tireless efforts, those of you who enjoyed this fic probably wouldn't have, lol! So, yeah, thank you to my betas!

Shout out to **SplishieSplash** who asked me to put the "dick in someone else's mouth" line in a fic at some point and it made it into here! haha! Hope you liked it!

I have SO much **headcannon** for this story, it is INSANE! So, instead of driving myself crazy by attempting a sequel, I'm going to do a long-winded Q&A session on my blog! Please pop by idareu2bme on tumblr and assault my **ask box** with as many questions about this fic as you can think of. Thank you for humoring me!


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